Purpose – Page 9 – The Will to Wake Up

All Together

Do you find it difficult to relate to people who seem to have it all together? Is it tempting to only share the parts of your life that are going well?

Recently, I’ve heard a lot of people note how, especially within the church, we are inclined to share how we successfully made it through past pain and difficulties, yet we are reluctant to reveal how we don’t have it all together in the present. The more I’ve thought about this, the truer it sounds. When we pretend like we have everything figured out, we are doing a disservice to both ourselves and the people witnessing our spiritual journey.

The truth is, no one has life figured out completely. They may look like they do, but they really don’t. Last week, I had lunch with an old friend, and we were discussing our plans for the next year. She eagerly shared how she would be joining a smaller community which she described as “nerdy”, which she looked forward to being a part of. I remarked that meant she wouldn’t feel like she had to keep up an image of having it all together. She laughed and replied, “When have I ever looked like I’ve had it all together?”

This is coming from someone who had the perfect grades in school, a great family, a comfortable home, played on a pro soccer team, nearly published a book at age 18, and had a decent sized friend group. To the outside observer, yeah, she did seem like she had it all together.

Prior to her confession of not “having it all together”, I assumed she saw herself as a successful, brilliant young woman with a bright future ahead of her. In fact, I was even a little intimidated by her as I thought about how far she had come in her goals while I felt so far back. Yet in that moment, I realized how truly terrible it is when we assume others have it better than we do.

When we see someone win a gold medal or receive a promotion, we don’t always hear about the sweat and tears it took to get where they are today. When we enviously watch others find the love of their lives or a boss who finally respects them, we don’t know about all the people who have rejected them or belittled them in the past. The point is, we don’t each others’ full stories. Even if everyone read a memoir written by everyone else, we still wouldn’t know each others’ daily thoughts and struggles. There’s no way we can take on that kind of responsibility.

That’s why it’s important to focus on the tasks God has given us specifically to do instead of looking over our shoulders at people who seem to have it better.

Additionally, when given the opportunity to share our testimonies, whether in front of a small group or one-on-one with a friend, we need to honest about how God is using our daily lives. That includes our setbacks, our moments of wondering whether or not we really overcame our past fear or regret. It also includes appreciating the little joys of each day, knowing that they may fade away tomorrow, yet we can still enjoy them in the moment.

Today, let yourself be vulnerable where you are being called to be vulnerable. Obviously, not everyone is in a place to hear about the deeper parts of your story. However, when God is calling you to share your story, don’t allow the temptation to appear as perfect as possible take over. Remember how the relatable messages of others have resonated with you. People can’t learn from human “perfection”. However, we can learn from the truths buried inside life’s ups and downs.

Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.
Ephesians 4:29

If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you.
John 15:7

Song Recommendation: All Together, by Mike Donehey: https://youtu.be/IV2PdVlcUDw

Don’t Forget the Constant

Do you ever feel an emptiness inside you that you’re longing to fill?

Humans are created with an innate desire to have an intimate relationship with another being. I use the term “being” lightly, because it’s not always a person. Sometimes it’s the obvious of a romantic partner; other times it’s the desire to have a close friend, mentor, or even an emotional support pet. Sometimes the “being” is a hobby or activity or lifestyle.

I’ve spent much of my life searching. Searching for a close friend, searching for romance at times, searching for a spiritual mentor, searching for someone who will fulfill this ache.

Now, you might be thinking, come on, Hannah, God’s always there. Was this “searching” happening before you came to faith?

Honestly, no. It started a few years ago, or at least consciously started at that time. That was right during the beginning of my deeper relationship with God. It was during a season of loneliness that I realized two things:

That I really need God
And that I really wanted someone (a person) to fill this void inside me

Over the past two months, I’ve learned a lot about some people I’ve held (and still hold) in high regard. I counted on them, and to be honest, they let me down. But I also saw a new side to them, and I’m thankful to know the whole picture so that I can better understand them. Yet it’s been really hard realizing that I can’t count on these people that I had hoped would fill the void.

I jumped from person to person in the hopes of finally finding someone who respected me, who enjoyed deep conversations, and who could be there for me emotionally and spiritually. I’d find someone for a season, and then they moved on. But what I longed for was a permanent person.

And today I hit rock bottom. Okay, that might be a bit of an exaggeration, but the build up of some hard things finally toppled me over. I had to take a deep breath and deal with my feelings. And that’s when I came to an important realization: I had been trying to fill God’s place with a person. That’s why I never felt satisfied.

Not only that, but I started to think of a few people I’ve taken for granted. A few close friends, good listeners with a steady presence, who have been constants in my life. Yet I discounted them during my search because I wanted something “bigger”. I wanted someone who would take God’s place, someone tangible with quick responses.

But the more I thought about it, the more I realized how God used my loneliest seasons to bring me closer to Him. He wasn’t bringing me through those times to be cruel, but to give me what my heart desired, His constant presence.

God has always been there. He will always be there. And while we can’t touch Him or feel Him or hear His audible voice, we can see how He’s working. I enjoy comparing God to love, not just because God literally is love, but because it is the best analogy for Him.

We all believe love exists (at least in some capacity). But we can’t see love, can we? We can’t feel the essence of love. We can’t hear love’s voice. Yet we know it’s there. We can see the way love brings people together and heals old wounds. We can see love transform lives.

God’s the same. We can feel God through others or nature or really through anything God chooses. We can see Him working even if we can’t physically see Him. We know that He is there simply by a feeling, by the signs around us.

Don’t discount the constants in your life, especially God. Don’t forget about the people who may not be the most “exciting” or take that void away, but who have been placed in your life to bring you closer to God.

Anything you put before God isn’t going to last. It could be something really great, but it’s not greater than God. And when you’re mad at God for taking something away, stop and ask if it was taking you away from God.

God is with you through it all. You are never truly alone. ❤

Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.
Deuteronomy 31:6

Are My Problems Too Big for God?

It can be easy to feel overwhelmed by life. What burdens do you need to give to God today?

It’s easy to forget that God is, well, God. The most powerful Being to ever exist. The One who created the solar system and oxygen and humans and giraffes (yes, giraffes, because they are awesome and who else could even think of that kind of creature??) and more things than there are numbers to count them!

It’s especially easy to forget that we should be in awe of God when life is going, in the words of my friend, pretty stinky. Because when things don’t go the way we planned or when it’s hard to see how God could possibly use this difficult or painful or downright irritating situation, we lose hope. We forget why it’s actually a positive thing to have God in charge.

Recently, I’ve witnessed a person I care about go through one of the hardest times of his life. It’s hard to understand why God can allow him to hit such a low. It’s one thing to want everyone to be saved and to know God loves them, but it’s completely another when you see a person who has such potential and already a close relationship with God be in such pain.

I’m sure we’ve all had our moments of doubt. Perhaps it was after an opportunity fell through or a relationship ended or a passion died out. We wonder why God has taken us through such barren wasteland, or maybe we even second-guess ourselves and wonder if we were even following God to begin with.

Yet over the past several weeks, as I’ve experienced both extreme joy and sorrow, as well as disappointment and confusion, God has made one thing clear to me. Before we are even born, God has chosen us. He has a purpose for us, and instead of that purpose being some sort of “idea” floating around, it is a tangible thing. God is intentional. He never allows us to experience anything that He didn’t take into account for.

Two and a half years ago, during one of the toughest times of my life, God sent me a verse, Psalm 116:8, “For you, Lord, have delivered me from death, my eyes from tears, my feet from stumbling.” Little did I know how that verse would play a role in my faith journey years later.

I wouldn’t call myself an artist, or at least a painter. However, I do enjoy painting as it’s very therapeutic for me. I’ve given my paintings, usually an abstract or ombre background with a verse or inspirational quote, as gifts before. I felt God leading me to paint something for my friend going through a rough time. I knew I should paint a verse, yet I wasn’t sure what verse to paint.

Ironically, the day before, I randomly decided to go through my old journals (there are 19 of them, so it’s no small feat, but clearly something I don’t do often). Anyway, I came across Psalm 116, which I had forgotten over time.

In that moment, I knew that was the passage to choose a verse from. I landed on verse 6 because it seemed more fitting. The next morning, right before I delivered the gift, I noticed my verse of the day, which just so happened to be Psalm 116:8.

God knew back when He first gave me that verse that it would encourage me, and someday be used through me to encourage another person. God had already chosen me for the tasks He’s given me now way back then and even before that.

It’s easy to think that our problems are too big for God. But let’s be honest, while our problems are difficult and can hurt, are they really bigger than defeating evil and creating the entire universe? I don’t think so.

God’s got this. I know it’s easier said than believed, but if you really think back, perhaps you can see how God has worked through situations you previously couldn’t understand. God can do so much through us, but we have to listen to Him. We have to trust that even when things don’t make sense, He has a bigger plan. He knows the future and He will only give us what’s meant for us.

So when you’re disappointed or overwhelmed, give those feelings to God. Remember that He has your best interest in mind and He is always with you.

Praise the Lord, all you nations;
extol him, all you peoples.
²For great is his love toward us,
and the faithfulness of the Lord endures forever.
Psalm 117:1-2

Oh, the depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are his judgments and how inscrutable his ways!
Romans 11:33

The Lord protects the unwary,
When I was brought low, He saved me.
Return to your rest, my soul,
for the Lord has been good to you.
Psalm 116:6-7

The Process of Being Made New

Have you taken the time to rest and work through what’s hurting your heart?

I’m sure we’ve all had that one road we avoid driving on, that’s never properly taken care of. As I’ve shared before, I work at a horse riding barn, which is located in a reasonably rural area. The closer I get, the more beat-up the roads become. Potholes, overhanging branches, and a random assortment of odd objects clutter the road.

The last main road leading to the property has had a few major potholes since I’ve started driving on it. They’ve tried filling the potholes with cement or asphalt, yet they often end up getting bigger after a while. A few weeks ago, they tore up the entire road, stripping it of the outer layer and leaving a worn down rubble path.

I was horrified, to say the least. Sure, the old road with the filled potholes wasn’t ideal, but this disgusting torn up mess was terrible. I feared they were just going to leave it like that after a week went by with no progress. However, my boss assured me they were just stripping the road in order to put down fresh asphalt.

To be honest, I began to doubt her, until one day, out of the blue, the entire road had been re-paved! It’s fresh, shiny even, and the smoothest road I’ve ever driven on. They went all out by adding a sidewalk, ramps at the neighborhood entrances, and new paint. It looks pretty perfect, and on the surface no one would know how crumbly it is underneath.

Sometimes, in life, we like to cover up our brokenness by filling our lives with empty things. They can be things that seem good, and maybe they even are, like relationships, sports, hobbies, or even volunteering. However, when we are trying to soothe an old wound with these things, we will never get to the heart of the problem.

It’s easy to push ourselves forward without taking the time to work through our past hurt. We might take small steps, like filling in the “potholes” with temporary solutions. A talk here or a devotional there, or even a prayer sometimes. But when we don’t have the patience to sit down and really feel those painful things and let go, we can’t be made new.

And trust me, God wants to make you new. He wants to tear away all the images you’re hiding behind and see the real you. And perhaps that person is broken, hurting, and overwhelmed. Perhaps that person really doesn’t have it all together and isn’t sure who they are anymore. But God wants to meet you where you’re at and bring you long-lasting healing.

He isn’t going to just help you work through one incident, either. He’s going to go all out, bringing understanding and healing to the root issues and carrying your burdens for you.

When you trust in Him and allow His peace to flow through you, you are a new creation. The old is gone, the new has come!

It will surely take time, perhaps it might not even feel worth it. But trust me, when you look back later, you’ll be glad that you allowed yourself time to rest and process. You are worth the time it takes to heal.

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!
2 Corinthians 5:17

Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all.
2 Corinthians 4:16-17

Song Recommendation: All Things New, by Big Daddy Weave: https://youtu.be/4_2aX_i4qpM

Your Presence Matters

Is it hard for you to believe you can make an impact? Here’s some encouragement and a reminder that your presence, in whatever form it takes today, matters.

As some of you may remember, this blog originally started out as an Enneagram blog. I’m not entirely sure what I was thinking since I’m not an Enneagram expert, though personalities fascinate me and the Enneagram is my favorite “organized personality” idea.

If you don’t know what the Enneagram is, it’s basically a way of categorizing humans into nine categories based on their childhood wounds, their current needs, as well as their strengths and weaknesses. I’ve researched a lot about the Enneagram, and one of the biggest parts of it is the message each type needs to hear the most. All of the messages, such as “you are loved without having to earn it” or “you can embrace both pain and joy”, are important for all people to understand, but they should resonate especially for their type.

I’m a type 9, which is called The Peacemaker, and we are known for being understanding, seeing all sides of situations, merging with the people around us, and not realizing our voices are important. The core message for 9s is “your presence matters”. While I love this phrase for 9s, I believe it’s one that you all need to hear today.

Sometimes, life can really, really suck. Like, really. Every day can feel agonizing. You wake up and wonder why you’re really here. It’s like an invisible burden that weighs a ton has been placed on your shoulders. You can barely breathe.

And during those times, it can be easy to forget why you’ve kept going this whole time. You may attribute it to fear or to not letting others down. But the truth is, the reason why you’re here is because you matter. You have an important role to play in the world. You are going to make a difference. In fact, you already have, just by being here.

It’s easy to forget the impact you have on other people’s lives. But even in the small ways, you are helping others along their difficult journeys too. Perhaps just seeing your name pop up on your friend’s phone makes them smile. Or maybe an encouraging word to a family member helped them not give up. Maybe holding the door open for a stranger at the grocery store or thanking a waiter caused them to realize someone still cares.

You may think you need to have it “all together” in order to make a difference. You may worry that everyone is watching you and judging you. And it’s true that there will always be judgemental people out there, but they aren’t the ones you should think about. They are just insecure and realize that perhaps you have something they don’t: confidence.

You don’t have to have it all together in order to make a difference. In fact, being vulnerable about the broken parts of your life, the parts that required you to seek help or turn to God, are the ones that people can relate to most. They can even be the most inspiring parts of your story.

Even if you don’t have a perfectly worded response, even if you forget to hold the door open, even if you can’t smile today, your presence alone is vital. Just by being here, in this space, you are bringing hope and joy to those around you. And they love you more than anything. ❤

I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.
John 16:33

Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins.
1 Peter 4:8

The Perfect Balance

Do you feel burned out, exhausted by life itself? May you find rest and encouragement through these words.

For those of you interested in the Olympics, I’m sure you’ve heard the headliner about U.S. gymnast, Simone Biles, withdrawing from her team’s competition this week. Each headline reads differently, but the one I love the most said, “Simone Biles’ Decision Changes the Way Athletes View the Olympics Forever”. By prioritizing her mental health, she is inspiring others who are pushing themselves too hard and encourages us to live life to the fullest rather than to please others. In fact, this choice means more than if she won gold. She could be saving lives by helping others realize their wellness matters more than any expectations placed on them. She will always be remembered, not just as a champion, but as an impactful advocate. Perhaps we can finally become a world that judges “success” not by metals but by how fulfilled and joyful people feel.

I’ve been thinking a lot about mental health recently. As I’ve shared, I’ve had my highs and lows regarding it. I’ve also witnessed others make life-altering decisions because of it, some to benefit them and others out of desperation. This is an issue that truly burdens my heart because so often people feel the need to “fit the mold” in order to be worth anything. They need to feel chosen by people, and if they are rejected, then they fear they have no future.

In all honesty, I have been rejected. Most of us have been rejected. Sometimes, we can just pass it off as that person’s loss and move on. Other times, it really stings. We hear a song that reminds us of them and we can no longer enjoy it. We want to reach out, but we don’t know how. We worry people will think we’re weak for needing a break or needing understanding.

We don’t all experience things the same way. Even if I had the exact same life as you, the things that bother you may not be the things that bother me. Things that cut deeper into me may not cut as deeply into you. That’s totally okay, and normal in fact. However, it means we have to be aware that people see situations in their lives differently, and we have to be sensitive to whatever stage of healing they are in, even if we would’ve healed faster or slower than them.

We need to be open and honest about our mental health. We need to seek the help we need or the space we need so that we can heal. And most of all, we need to turn to God and loving people He’s placed in our lives in order to remember where our worth comes from.

But we also can’t be fixated on one aspect of our lives. That’s often what gets us buried deeper into the hole of discouragement in the first place. When we only focus on our mental health, we can lose sight of our physical or spiritual health, or vice versa.

I was recently talking with a mentor who shared the three “healths”: spiritual (our relationship with God), physical (our lifestyle choices), and mental/emotional (how we feel, especially how much peace we have). There needs to be a balance between the three of them. God is working within each piece of this circle, but we have to do our part to give proper attention to each aspect.

But when we’re supposed to put God first, how can we have both balance and priorities? Well, prioritize listening to God. Ask Him what areas of your life you’re neglecting. If you continue to stay attuned to Him, you’ll be able to find that perfect balance.

Today, you may be feeling overwhelmed. You may be feel all alone. Perhaps you fear that nobody really loves you or cares or sees or knows. But I promise you that you are never alone. God knows you. He loves you and will always take care of you. He sees you, and He is putting you on others’ hearts so that they will see you and love you too. Whatever is burdening you right now will not last forever. Do what you need to in order to heal, regardless of how others might judge you. In the end, your life is between you and God. Your life is a gift, not just to you but to those who are privileged enough to be around you, to be your friend. You are worth whatever it takes to heal.

I love the Lord, for he heard my voice;
    he heard my cry for mercy.
Because he turned his ear to me,
    I will call on him as long as I live.
The cords of death entangled me,
    the anguish of the grave came over me;
    I was overcome by distress and sorrow.
Then I called on the name of the Lord:
    “Lord, save me!”
The Lord is gracious and righteous;
    our God is full of compassion.
The Lord protects the unwary;
    when I was brought low, he saved me.
Return to your rest, my soul,
    for the Lord has been good to you.
For you, Lord, have delivered me from death,
    my eyes from tears,
    my feet from stumbling,
that I may walk before the Lord
    in the land of the living.
Psalm 116:1-9

Known

Do you ever wish you knew what God would say to your questions?

Do you have that person in your life that you know so incredibly well, you feel like you can read their minds? You know their answer to your question before you even ask, and you could answer for them if need be. You know how they feel about situations, what advice they’d probably give you, and what each distinct facial expression means.

Yesterday, I had a moment with my mom that freaked her out. She started explaining a situation, and without even being a sentence into it, I knew exactly who she was talking about and my answer to her unspoken question. I’d like to think I have superpowers, but in reality it’s likely because she and I have been spending way more time together due to the pandemic. That’s what it takes to fully know someone, spending lots of time with them and watching their reactions to similar situations.

So many times I’ve wished to know God’s answers to all my questions and decisions. Then I wouldn’t experience doubt or regret. I’ve often heard people say that they’d have a relationship with God if they could hear His voice. As Christians, we often worry about pleasing God, and second-guess everything because we aren’t sure if we’re doing what God wants us to.

But here’s the thing: even if we never hear God audibly speak, we can still know His answers to every single question and concern we have.

Now, you might be half-way through an eye roll, thinking, “Great, Hannah’s going to suggest reading the Bible and praying more. Heard that one before.”

Well…yes. But I’m not going to just leave you with that.

You see, we can know God just as well as we know that one person in our lives fully. By spending time with God, we can figure out how He’d react to certain situations. By listening to how God reacted to other situations in the past, (hint hint, through the Bible), we can see how He might react to situations now. The best part about God is that He never changes His mind. He will never take away the gift of grace and salvation He’s given us. He will never suddenly stop loving us. His plan will always come to completion at the right time.

So, if you have the desire to know what God thinks, which is wonderful if you do, then spend more time with God. Even spending an extra few minutes in the Word can bring so much clarity. And prayer…that’s so underrated. Praying can truly make miracles happen. Praying can bring you peace when you thought you could never feel remotely content again. Most of all, prayer is a conversation with God, and what better way to get to know Him than talk with Him?

God knows you fully and loves you, not despite, but because of who you are. When you feel like no one really gets you or you don’t feel like explaining yourself, go to God. He already knows and He’s ready to welcome you with open arms.

But if anyone loves God, he is known by Him.
1 Corinthians 8:3

I am the good shepherd, and I know My own and My own know Me.
John 10:14

Song suggestion: Known, by Tauren Wells: https://youtu.be/gbQ6Lfh5L14

Hope for the “Doormats”

Are you tired of feeling used and your worth depending on others? Here’s some encouragement!

There’s a reason why certain types of people are called doormats. You know what I’m talking about. People who are extremely kind, flexible, and wish for others to notice them, but often make little effort to bring attention to themselves. Hopeful that they will finally get noticed for all the work they do on others’ behalves. Waiting, waiting, waiting. Until they finally grow tired of feeling used.

If you think about it, doormats, or rugs, are a really good analogy when describing these characteristics. When you have a rug, you likely forget to clean it. You step on it, it absorbs the dirt, grime, and pet hair of your family, and then it eventually gets thrown out. I’ve never heard of someone looking forward to inheriting their family member’s rug. Likely rugs aren’t even in the will.

You might be feeling a little exposed at the moment. Perhaps you’re a “doormat”; you allow people to walk all over you. Or maybe there’s someone in your life who you’ve taken for granted. I’ve been at both ends of the spectrum and neither is pleasant, or comfortable, to confront.

You see, when we are doormats, we are trying to find our worth in something that isn’t stable. We are seeking affection, affirmation, and appreciation from people who don’t see our value. We cling to the little words or gifts that might make all we’re sacrificing (often our mental health) worth it. But then, when we’re eventually tossed out or fed up, we’re left feeling empty.

Then, on the other side of things, when we don’t notice the people around us, we can often unintentionally make them feel unseen. Or maybe we are aware of how they look up to us and want to please us, and we (guiltily) take advantage of it. It makes us feel better about ourselves, like we finally have an important place in this world. But that feeling is only temporary.

Though it might seem easier to be the “user” in this situation, the truth is, both parties are hurting. They are both hoping to find a relationship where they feel worthy.

And, my friends, I have the answer to this longing: Jesus. (By now, you probably guessed it 😉 )

Jesus loves us no matter what. Nothing we do or don’t do can change that. He will pick up all our broken pieces and make us whole again. He will guide us through the storms of life and give us unexplainable peace when the hard times hit. He leads us to the right decisions and prompts us to make a difference in others’ lives.

Most importantly, He cares about us and sees us as worthy.

And when we feel worthy, we can help others feel worthy. When we walk down the street, we won’t just be walking through a crowd of noisy people. Instead, we can see each person individually, in need of God’s love. The annoying child next door, the nosy coworker, or the quiet woman on the bus suddenly becomes God’s precious creation.

So today, ask yourself if you are placing yourself in situations that show your true worth. Are you over-extending yourself for the sake of getting others’ approval? Are you overlooking someone who needs to be shown God’s love today?

You will always been worthy and seen by God. ❤

Fear not, therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows.
Matthew 10:32

But when the goodness and loving kindness of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of works done by us in righteousness, but according to his own mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewal of the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us richly through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that being justified by his grace we might become heirs according to the hope of eternal life.
Titus 3:4-7

Letting Go of the Darkness

When we feel insecure, it’s easy to slip into the darkness and hide who we really are. But remembering that God never leaves us can help us have courage in our relationships.

According to experts, we look better in the dark. The more I think about it, the more it makes sense. When in dimly lit places, we can hide our flaws and mask our insecurities behind the shadows.

If you’ve noticed, restaurants targeting dating couples are often dimly lit. You’d suppose it’s to create a romantic ambiance, right? But how is it really more romantic? (Without being overly suggestive here…)

Well, it’s all scientific, actually. The pupils in our eyes dilate when we’re in the dark, as well as when we see something we like. That means our eyes are trying to get a better look at it, letting more light in. Thus, by creating an environment where our pupils naturally dilate, we are more inclined to find the person in front of us attractive and enjoyable in this kind of setting.

Now, you may be wondering what this has to do with faith advice or encouragement, but trust me, as always, I do eventually get to a point!

We often cling to the dark when we are scared of revealing our vulnerable side, the parts of us we aren’t super proud of. The “dark” can refer to a multitude of masks, really, whether it be a successful job, a busy schedule, or even acts of generosity. It can also be secluding one’s self, not opening up to people who care, or literally hiding where no one will think to look. We use the darkness as a way to escape the present pain and to make ourselves appear better than we really are.

But, as you may have already learned the hard way, relationships have to be built on honesty. I once read the quote, “If people don’t like you for what you are, they will not like you more for pretending to be what you are not.” (Rabbi Jonathan Sacks)

There is great truth in this. It’s easy to want to put on a show for people you love, people who seem “better” than you (spoiler: they are not), and people you hope to keep in your life. For me, I was always afraid of losing people. I still struggle with this fear. When I worry they’ll forget me or not need me around anymore, I force myself to pretend that everything’s okay when I’m around them and do whatever I can to make them need me or want me around.

But by the end of the day, it makes me feel unsatisfied. That’s because the only way we can feel satisfied in our relationships is when we put them in God’s hands and stay true to who we are. Though we’d like to have certain people in our lives forever, sometimes it’s not meant to be. Every relationship has a reason, whether they last a week or for decades. Even a short interaction with a waitress or a cashier might be life-changing. You never know.

God uses different people for different seasons of our lives. He wants us to find people who love us just the way we are. Yes, they should encourage us to grow, but they shouldn’t make us feel bad for being who God created us to be, quirks and all. And if they leave, they leave.

But you know who will never leave? God. He is the light. No dark facade can phase Him. And He will always, always be by your side through thick and thin. It may not feel like it sometimes, when the hard times hit, but I love what a wise friend of mine once said. God saved him from a potentially tragic situation, and he said, (paraphrased), “I know that Jesus was in the seat next to me. Even if I had been seriously hurt, He still would’ve been with me. No matter what, Jesus is always with me.” I will always keep this piece of wisdom close to me. That kind of trust astounds me, and hopefully it inspires you as well.

Breathe in, remembering that you have nothing to fear. Breathe out, remembering that Jesus will never leave you nor forsake you.

For you were formerly darkness, but now you are Light in the Lord; walk as children of Light.
Ephesians 5:8

Even the darkness is not dark to You,
And the night is as bright as the day.
Darkness and light are alike to You.
Psalm 139:12

For He rescued us from the domain of darkness, and transferred us to the kingdom of His beloved Son
Colossians 1:13

But all things become visible when they are exposed by the light, for everything that becomes visible is light.
Ephesians 5:13

Running the Right Race

With all the terrible things in our world, it can be easy to lose hope. Here is some encouragement when running the race called “life”.

My dog, Rocky, is something else, let me tell you! I’ve only had him a little over a year, yet I could fill a book with stories about him. From the time he broke into the bathroom to get to my aunt (who happened to be showering and thought he was a murderer…and who hasn’t stayed with us since) to yesterday’s shenanigans of ripping open a new tissue box and taking large chomps out of each tissue, he’s quite the character. He’s got boundless energy…unless he’s napping, in which he would prefer to not be disturbed 🙂

Recently, he’s figured out where our house is in perspective to the other parts of the neighborhood. Take him anywhere, and he can lead you home. In fact, if you try taking him anywhere, he will lead you home. Apparently he believes once around the block is enough exercise for him.

Today, as we were turning the corner and our house was in view, his little legs stretched out as he fast-walked. His tail was in the air, his tongue hanging out, and his eyes fixed on the prize: home. I called out his name a few times, but nothing could distract him. He knew where he was going and nothing could get in his way.

The apostle Paul compares our lives to a race. In multiple letters, he commands us to “run the good race” by following God’s truth, exercising self-control, and most of all, fixing our eyes on the prize. And that prize is eternal, nothing we can even comprehend down here.

It’s easy to get distracted from the prize, life with God, when we are in the world, doing the day-to-day things. Our anxieties, relationships, and work can make us forget that there is more to us than this life. We can feel bogged down by the weight of this world when we see our climate declining, families in desperate situations, and people being discriminated against.

It’s important to fight for justice and help those in need. In fact, Jesus commands us to do just that. However, when it feels like nothing will get better, we must remember that this world is only temporary. We can only do the best we can, and then we have to trust that Jesus knows what He’s doing.

God can seem cruel by allowing evil to take place in the world. But He knows the future. He knows that while there are certainly present suffering, it is nothing in comparison to the wonderful things He has in store for us. We must not blame Him for the bad things that happen, and instead focus on what good He may be bringing from it.

We just have to keep running the good race and remember that God is in control. I believe in you. Don’t give up.

I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.
2 Timothy 4:7

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.
Hebrews 12:1

Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love him.
James 1:12