Tag: Gods love

Our Need for Light

We will grow from all our experiences, but how can we make sure that growth produces good things?

I’ve had my fair share of experiences with mold, my most recent involving my electric toothbrush. There’s a little divot in the plastic where the bottom of the toothbrush rests when I’m not using it, and over time, the darkness and the dampness in that spot has created an orangish gook (yes, I’m definitely using the technical terms here). I must say, it’s rather disconcerting seeing this gook on the bottom of the instrument that’s meant to clean my mouth. When the gook first appeared, I wiped it and it went away. But the lazier I got about cleaning it, the worse the gook became.

None of us would want to be compared to mold. Come on, it’s disgusting, a super nauseating color, and such an odd, disturbing texture. Yet sometimes, the fruit from our lives takes the form of mold rather than beautiful flowers or delicious fruit.

You may be wondering what I mean by the “fruit of our lives”. Well, Jesus actually uses fruit when describing how people will know we are Christians. He says, “By their fruits, you will know them.” (Matthew 7:20) Our fruits are essentially our legacy. Are we helping others? Are we making a difference? It doesn’t have to be changing the whole world, but are we at least making a difference in the lives of people around us? Are we known for being kind, generous, and patient? What kinds of fruits are we producing through our growth?

Growth. There’s the key word. The only way any fruit can be produced is when we grow. Now, God can certainly work through pleasant situations as well as painful ones, but if you look back on your life, you can probably see how memorable the painful lessons were. It was when you were lonely that God revealed you are never alone. It was when you were grieving that the verse “And Jesus wept” suddenly meant something to you as you realized that Jesus was crying alongside you. It was when you were broken that you searched for healing from the ultimate Healer. Jesus is the one who can light our path and cultivate good fruit from all of our experiences.

The thing is, we can technically grow in both the light and the dark. But when we grow in the dark, away from God’s counsel, away from people who care about us, away from wisdom, we end up producing mold. When we huddle in our own messes, unwilling to cleanse ourselves, unwilling to do the difficult work it takes to learn from our mistakes, we end up worse than how we started.

But when we grow in the light, we can produce beautiful fruit. We can become pops of color in a dismal, gray world. We can bloom like sunflowers, bringing joy to everyone we know. We can bring peace and comfort, like lilies, to those in need. We can bring nourishment and delight, like the fruit sitting in your fruit bowl right now.

When we allow the light to pour in, we begin to reflect the goodness of God.

You see, my friend, no matter what situation you’re in, you will grow. Difficulties, stress, and pain are bound to change us. But wouldn’t you want something good to come from those things? Wouldn’t you rather be a source of hope rather than wallow in self-pity?

But only you get to choose which path you’ll take. Will you allow God to move through you, shaping you into the person you are meant to be? It will take time. It may even take additional pain before you can see what God’s doing. But isn’t the good fruit worth it?

Today, ask yourself whether you’re growing in light or in darkness. It’s not too late to remove the moldy parts of your life and start over. God has the divine cleaning tools of forgiveness, grace, and mercy. He is more than ready to be the light you desperately crave.

He chose to give us birth through the word of truth, that we might be a kind of firstfruits of all he created.

James 1:18

For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light (for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness and truth) and find out what pleases the Lord. Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them. It is shameful even to mention what the disobedient do in secret. But everything exposed by the light becomes visible—and everything that is illuminated becomes a light. This is why it is said: “Wake up, sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you.

Ephesians 5:8-14

Hope for When You Don’t Belong

Do you pour out your heart for others, only to end up being their “second choice”? Here is hope for those left behind, wondering where they fit into this mess called “life”.

Sometimes it feels pointless. You are there for others, you prioritize them, and then they make you their second best option, if even that. You let their words–or rather, lack of words–define who you are.

But even if you are never chosen by the people you love, remember this:

The world is not full of truth. People don’t know what they are missing. You aren’t missing out–they are. By continuing to be faithful, you will do something much greater than be “chosen”. You will leave a lasting legacy. A legacy full of love. And guess what?

You are chosen.

Maybe not by the people who fill your mind and break your heart, but by the people God has led to love you. You may not know who they are yet, but they are there. Praying, watching, waiting, hoping. They may not fully understand why God has placed you on their hearts, but you are being looked out for.

Most of all, God chose you. He chose you when He sent His son as a sacrifice. He sent Jesus as your salvation and proof of His love. He chooses you every day, even when our sin breaks His heart.

You are someone’s first choice. You are God’s first choice. Don’t let anyone make you feel otherwise. You will always be cherished and loved by the One who knows every single part of you. And He will never, ever leave you behind. ❤

But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.

1 Peter 2:9

And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another advocate to help you and be with you forever— the Spirit of truth. The world cannot accept him, because it neither sees him nor knows him. But you know him, for he lives with you and will be in you.

John 14:16-17

Here is a podcast episode related to today’s post! I hope you enjoy it!

Episode link: https://anchor.fm/hannah-chung4/episodes/Hope-for-When-You-Dont-Belong-e15okoq/a-a1plh4

Don’t Forget the Constant

Do you ever feel an emptiness inside you that you’re longing to fill?

Humans are created with an innate desire to have an intimate relationship with another being. I use the term “being” lightly, because it’s not always a person. Sometimes it’s the obvious of a romantic partner; other times it’s the desire to have a close friend, mentor, or even an emotional support pet. Sometimes the “being” is a hobby or activity or lifestyle.

I’ve spent much of my life searching. Searching for a close friend, searching for romance at times, searching for a spiritual mentor, searching for someone who will fulfill this ache.

Now, you might be thinking, come on, Hannah, God’s always there. Was this “searching” happening before you came to faith?

Honestly, no. It started a few years ago, or at least consciously started at that time. That was right during the beginning of my deeper relationship with God. It was during a season of loneliness that I realized two things:

  1. That I really need God
  2. And that I really wanted someone (a person) to fill this void inside me

Over the past two months, I’ve learned a lot about some people I’ve held (and still hold) in high regard. I counted on them, and to be honest, they let me down. But I also saw a new side to them, and I’m thankful to know the whole picture so that I can better understand them. Yet it’s been really hard realizing that I can’t count on these people that I had hoped would fill the void.

I jumped from person to person in the hopes of finally finding someone who respected me, who enjoyed deep conversations, and who could be there for me emotionally and spiritually. I’d find someone for a season, and then they moved on. But what I longed for was a permanent person.

And today I hit rock bottom. Okay, that might be a bit of an exaggeration, but the build up of some hard things finally toppled me over. I had to take a deep breath and deal with my feelings. And that’s when I came to an important realization: I had been trying to fill God’s place with a person. That’s why I never felt satisfied.

Not only that, but I started to think of a few people I’ve taken for granted. A few close friends, good listeners with a steady presence, who have been constants in my life. Yet I discounted them during my search because I wanted something “bigger”. I wanted someone who would take God’s place, someone tangible with quick responses.

But the more I thought about it, the more I realized how God used my loneliest seasons to bring me closer to Him. He wasn’t bringing me through those times to be cruel, but to give me what my heart desired, His constant presence.

God has always been there. He will always be there. And while we can’t touch Him or feel Him or hear His audible voice, we can see how He’s working. I enjoy comparing God to love, not just because God literally is love, but because it is the best analogy for Him.

We all believe love exists (at least in some capacity). But we can’t see love, can we? We can’t feel the essence of love. We can’t hear love’s voice. Yet we know it’s there. We can see the way love brings people together and heals old wounds. We can see love transform lives.

God’s the same. We can feel God through others or nature or really through anything God chooses. We can see Him working even if we can’t physically see Him. We know that He is there simply by a feeling, by the signs around us.

Don’t discount the constants in your life, especially God. Don’t forget about the people who may not be the most “exciting” or take that void away, but who have been placed in your life to bring you closer to God.

Anything you put before God isn’t going to last. It could be something really great, but it’s not greater than God. And when you’re mad at God for taking something away, stop and ask if it was taking you away from God.

God is with you through it all. You are never truly alone. ❤

Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.

Deuteronomy 31:6

Are My Problems Too Big for God?

It can be easy to feel overwhelmed by life. What burdens do you need to give to God today?

It’s easy to forget that God is, well, God. The most powerful Being to ever exist. The One who created the solar system and oxygen and humans and giraffes (yes, giraffes, because they are awesome and who else could even think of that kind of creature??) and more things than there are numbers to count them!

It’s especially easy to forget that we should be in awe of God when life is going, in the words of my friend, pretty stinky. Because when things don’t go the way we planned or when it’s hard to see how God could possibly use this difficult or painful or downright irritating situation, we lose hope. We forget why it’s actually a positive thing to have God in charge.

Recently, I’ve witnessed a person I care about go through one of the hardest times of his life. It’s hard to understand why God can allow him to hit such a low. It’s one thing to want everyone to be saved and to know God loves them, but it’s completely another when you see a person who has such potential and already a close relationship with God be in such pain.

I’m sure we’ve all had our moments of doubt. Perhaps it was after an opportunity fell through or a relationship ended or a passion died out. We wonder why God has taken us through such barren wasteland, or maybe we even second-guess ourselves and wonder if we were even following God to begin with.

Yet over the past several weeks, as I’ve experienced both extreme joy and sorrow, as well as disappointment and confusion, God has made one thing clear to me. Before we are even born, God has chosen us. He has a purpose for us, and instead of that purpose being some sort of “idea” floating around, it is a tangible thing. God is intentional. He never allows us to experience anything that He didn’t take into account for.

Two and a half years ago, during one of the toughest times of my life, God sent me a verse, Psalm 116:8, “For you, Lord, have delivered me from death, my eyes from tears, my feet from stumbling.” Little did I know how that verse would play a role in my faith journey years later.

I wouldn’t call myself an artist, or at least a painter. However, I do enjoy painting as it’s very therapeutic for me. I’ve given my paintings, usually an abstract or ombre background with a verse or inspirational quote, as gifts before. I felt God leading me to paint something for my friend going through a rough time. I knew I should paint a verse, yet I wasn’t sure what verse to paint.

Ironically, the day before, I randomly decided to go through my old journals (there are 19 of them, so it’s no small feat, but clearly something I don’t do often). Anyway, I came across Psalm 116, which I had forgotten over time.

In that moment, I knew that was the passage to choose a verse from. I landed on verse 6 because it seemed more fitting. The next morning, right before I delivered the gift, I noticed my verse of the day, which just so happened to be Psalm 116:8.

God knew back when He first gave me that verse that it would encourage me, and someday be used through me to encourage another person. God had already chosen me for the tasks He’s given me now way back then and even before that.

It’s easy to think that our problems are too big for God. But let’s be honest, while our problems are difficult and can hurt, are they really bigger than defeating evil and creating the entire universe? I don’t think so.

God’s got this. I know it’s easier said than believed, but if you really think back, perhaps you can see how God has worked through situations you previously couldn’t understand. God can do so much through us, but we have to listen to Him. We have to trust that even when things don’t make sense, He has a bigger plan. He knows the future and He will only give us what’s meant for us.

So when you’re disappointed or overwhelmed, give those feelings to God. Remember that He has your best interest in mind and He is always with you.

Praise the Lord, all you nations;
    extol him, all you peoples.
2 For great is his love toward us,
    and the faithfulness of the Lord endures forever.

Psalm 117:1-2

Oh, the depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are his judgments and how inscrutable his ways!

Romans 11:33

The Lord protects the unwary,

When I was brought low, He saved me.

Return to your rest, my soul,
    for the Lord has been good to you.

Psalm 116:6-7

Words of Wisdom

Have you been hurt by someone’s words in an argument?

We all have that one phrase that gets under our skin. It’s usually a criticism, and something people don’t realize harms us. Often it’s meant to shine a light on a weakness of ours (or maybe a perceived weakness that we’re working on), but it wounds instead.

For me, it’s being called “selfish”. I’ll never forget the time in middle school when I was first outright called selfish. My mom and I were in an argument and she used that term against me. That stung deep because my whole life, growing up as an only child, everyone assumed I was self-centered. And I’ll admit, I’ve had moments of being selfish. However, it was something I was working on and worked so hard to not be. I felt like a burden and did everything I could to not make things about myself, even sacrificing my sanity sometimes. But there it was, that evil word. This particular irritation, this deep wound that comes when it’s implied that I’m not thinking of others, must stem from this feeling of needing to earn my worth, of not sacrificing enough. Often, these “trigger phrases” come from past pain and deep seeded lies from the enemy. Nonetheless, they cause us to spiral into self-doubt and cause us to forget who we are in Jesus.

I don’t blame my mom, or others who have used this adjective. My mom even denies having that argument because she can’t imagine saying that and she affirms me on a regular basis. However, whenever the word “selfish” comes up, it still stings.

Today, when I shared how I felt about a sensitive subject with a friend, she shot back, “You’re not the only one going through hard things.” That hurt. That hurt a lot. To me, that was an implication that I’m a selfish person. While she didn’t mean to wound me, it went far deeper than she realized.

But this post isn’t a debate of whether or not I’m a selfish person. It’s about what I’ve learned from being hurt by other people’s misguided remarks. I know I’ve hurt others with my words before, especially words coming from an angry place.

Words hold a lot of power. A lot more power than we realize. We won’t always realize how much they can change others’ lives, whether for good or bad. That’s why we have to be careful with our words, using them sparingly sometimes, or inserting them into heated conversations to bring peace other times.

The issue with words is that they are so easy to say or type or write. In a few seconds, there can be a whole angry paragraph on text sent out. Or in the blink of an eye, we’ve opened our mouths and spit out the very same hurt someone else has thrown at us. When we don’t think, we can’t exercise wisdom.

Now, I’ll be honest, it’s pretty much impossible to never hurt anyone’s feelings, especially with your words. But it’s important to always keep in the back of your mind that your words may have more impact than you realize. So make that impact positive. Make your words be what lifts people up.

For me, the phrase “You’re never alone” has stuck with me from a prayer a friend prayed over me during a retreat during one of my darkest times. Still when I hear it, I feel an instant sense of warmth and love. I feel God’s presence beside me. It has the opposite effect of “You’re not thinking of others”.

We all have weaknesses. I have more than I can count, and sometimes selfishness is one of them. Sometimes speaking before I think is one of them. When we see a brother or sister in Christ struggling with a sin that’s hurting others, we should find a way to help them work through it. But we shouldn’t make them think that they are any less of a person by struggling with something because we are no more perfect than they are.

It is by God’s grace that we are here, and when we extend that grace to others, we will begin to see the world in a whole new light. The light of God’s unfailing love. ❤

For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God.

Ephesians 2:8

This you know, my beloved brethren. But everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger.

James 1:19

The Process of Being Made New

Have you taken the time to rest and work through what’s hurting your heart?

I’m sure we’ve all had that one road we avoid driving on, that’s never properly taken care of. As I’ve shared before, I work at a horse riding barn, which is located in a reasonably rural area. The closer I get, the more beat-up the roads become. Potholes, overhanging branches, and a random assortment of odd objects clutter the road.

The last main road leading to the property has had a few major potholes since I’ve started driving on it. They’ve tried filling the potholes with cement or asphalt, yet they often end up getting bigger after a while. A few weeks ago, they tore up the entire road, stripping it of the outer layer and leaving a worn down rubble path.

I was horrified, to say the least. Sure, the old road with the filled potholes wasn’t ideal, but this disgusting torn up mess was terrible. I feared they were just going to leave it like that after a week went by with no progress. However, my boss assured me they were just stripping the road in order to put down fresh asphalt.

To be honest, I began to doubt her, until one day, out of the blue, the entire road had been re-paved! It’s fresh, shiny even, and the smoothest road I’ve ever driven on. They went all out by adding a sidewalk, ramps at the neighborhood entrances, and new paint. It looks pretty perfect, and on the surface no one would know how crumbly it is underneath.

Sometimes, in life, we like to cover up our brokenness by filling our lives with empty things. They can be things that seem good, and maybe they even are, like relationships, sports, hobbies, or even volunteering. However, when we are trying to soothe an old wound with these things, we will never get to the heart of the problem.

It’s easy to push ourselves forward without taking the time to work through our past hurt. We might take small steps, like filling in the “potholes” with temporary solutions. A talk here or a devotional there, or even a prayer sometimes. But when we don’t have the patience to sit down and really feel those painful things and let go, we can’t be made new.

And trust me, God wants to make you new. He wants to tear away all the images you’re hiding behind and see the real you. And perhaps that person is broken, hurting, and overwhelmed. Perhaps that person really doesn’t have it all together and isn’t sure who they are anymore. But God wants to meet you where you’re at and bring you long-lasting healing.

He isn’t going to just help you work through one incident, either. He’s going to go all out, bringing understanding and healing to the root issues and carrying your burdens for you.

When you trust in Him and allow His peace to flow through you, you are a new creation. The old is gone, the new has come!

It will surely take time, perhaps it might not even feel worth it. But trust me, when you look back later, you’ll be glad that you allowed yourself time to rest and process. You are worth the time it takes to heal.

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!

2 Corinthians 5:17

Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all.

2 Corinthians 4:16-17

Song Recommendation: All Things New, by Big Daddy Weave: https://youtu.be/4_2aX_i4qpM

Your Presence Matters

Is it hard for you to believe you can make an impact? Here’s some encouragement and a reminder that your presence, in whatever form it takes today, matters.

As some of you may remember, this blog originally started out as an Enneagram blog. I’m not entirely sure what I was thinking since I’m not an Enneagram expert, though personalities fascinate me and the Enneagram is my favorite “organized personality” idea.

If you don’t know what the Enneagram is, it’s basically a way of categorizing humans into nine categories based on their childhood wounds, their current needs, as well as their strengths and weaknesses. I’ve researched a lot about the Enneagram, and one of the biggest parts of it is the message each type needs to hear the most. All of the messages, such as “you are loved without having to earn it” or “you can embrace both pain and joy”, are important for all people to understand, but they should resonate especially for their type.

I’m a type 9, which is called The Peacemaker, and we are known for being understanding, seeing all sides of situations, merging with the people around us, and not realizing our voices are important. The core message for 9s is “your presence matters”. While I love this phrase for 9s, I believe it’s one that you all need to hear today.

Sometimes, life can really, really suck. Like, really. Every day can feel agonizing. You wake up and wonder why you’re really here. It’s like an invisible burden that weighs a ton has been placed on your shoulders. You can barely breathe.

And during those times, it can be easy to forget why you’ve kept going this whole time. You may attribute it to fear or to not letting others down. But the truth is, the reason why you’re here is because you matter. You have an important role to play in the world. You are going to make a difference. In fact, you already have, just by being here.

It’s easy to forget the impact you have on other people’s lives. But even in the small ways, you are helping others along their difficult journeys too. Perhaps just seeing your name pop up on your friend’s phone makes them smile. Or maybe an encouraging word to a family member helped them not give up. Maybe holding the door open for a stranger at the grocery store or thanking a waiter caused them to realize someone still cares.

You may think you need to have it “all together” in order to make a difference. You may worry that everyone is watching you and judging you. And it’s true that there will always be judgemental people out there, but they aren’t the ones you should think about. They are just insecure and realize that perhaps you have something they don’t: confidence.

You don’t have to have it all together in order to make a difference. In fact, being vulnerable about the broken parts of your life, the parts that required you to seek help or turn to God, are the ones that people can relate to most. They can even be the most inspiring parts of your story.

Even if you don’t have a perfectly worded response, even if you forget to hold the door open, even if you can’t smile today, your presence alone is vital. Just by being here, in this space, you are bringing hope and joy to those around you. And they love you more than anything. ❤

I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.

John 16:33

Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins.

1 Peter 4:8

Let God Grow You

Are you struggling to figure out why you are at a difficult point in your journey right now?

To be honest, I’ve had a rough week. I won’t get into the details right now, but I have felt really upset at myself for going back to a place I had hoped not to go back to. Do you ever pride yourself on how far you’ve come, only to end up feeling like you’re in the exact same place? You thought you overcame things like overthinking situations or doubting yourself or God, and then you’re right back there.

It almost feels worse than it did originally.

Last night, I scrolled through some old videos, and by old, I mean old. Little Hannah was a lot different than grown-up Hannah. I mean, I don’t crack cow jokes and name my stuffed animals “Utters” anymore…right?

Anyway, as much as I could see what was different about me, I also saw similarities. In tutorial videos, I kept affirming my invisible audience and reminding them that I couldn’t get it the first time either. I posted multiple videos to songs I still enjoy. One thing that caught my attention was a video I made on a day when I didn’t feel silly. (Which wasn’t very often 😂) It was a video where I was listening to a song by Lauren Daigle and drawing a girl climbing a mountain.

Music and art have always been my sources of escape. My way to connect with God and with myself after a tough day. Some things never change. And maybe that’s okay.

Wherever you are in your life, I hope you know that you are growing. I hope you know that even if you have been sucked back into the dark, there is still a light at the end of the tunnel. You are not stuck. You are still being transformed into the person you are meant to be.

Sometimes, things remind us of our past, and we think that’s a bad thing. But the truth is, we will never be the same person we once were. We are not stuck in that identity. We can still keep the aspects of our lives that make us, well, us, and grow into better people.

Even if you are feeling old feelings, you are not that same old person. You are coming at this problem with more wisdom, more strength from God, and more hope because you know that you can get through this.

My church is going through the book of Exodus right now, and we just reached the part where the Israelites are going through the wilderness with God. Based on their grumbling and complaining, and the fact that they were traveling through the wilderness, I’m guessing it wasn’t all fun and games. I picture rocky terrain, a thirst and hunger for comfort, and decreasing motivation.

I often compare the Israelites journeying through the wilderness to a hike. (Though I hope you don’t take 40 year hikes, but if you do, congrats, you just blew my mind!)

To be honest, I don’t usually enjoy the hiking process. I mean, getting dirt and twigs stuck in your tennis shoes, climbing up never-ending hills, and seeing tree after tree after tree…oh and don’t get me started on the rocks! Once my toes were black and blue after stubbing them on giant rocks during a hike.

So why do we hike when the journey is so difficult? Because of what’s at the end.

Sometimes, we are rewarded with a gorgeous waterfall or a picturesque view of a town. Other times, we simply get the pleasure of a job well done. We made it! We did it! And we can go out and do it again.

Difficult seasons of life are often like taking a hike. We have to get through a lot of prickly bushes of people, stinging nettles of mean words, and falls that send us spiraling into anxiety.

But once we get to the end, it’s always worth the hike. Sometimes God rewards us by showing us how we helped others or allows us to share our stories to make a difference. He might even give us a simple solution at the end of the whole journey. Other times, He allows us to relish in the satisfaction of making it this far, of growing in confidence.

Speaking of growing…that’s the whole point of our “life hikes”.

When faced with an opportunity to grow, we often try to avoid it by taking a smoother route. But that route will eventually lead back to the rocky road because that’s the only way to true growth. We can’t get to the reward until we get through the tough stuff. Until we finally learn what God’s teaching us.

We can go in kicking and screaming, demanding an easier way, until we give up and let God take us where we need to go. That often leads to detours that make the trip even longer and more trying. But when we go in with a tender heart, with open ears and eyes, we will grow even deeper into who God wants us to be.

When we focus on the gorgeous waterfall, we forget about the sharp rocks beneath us. When we focus on our Creator, we forget about the ones who call us unworthy. When we focus on who God sees us as, we forget about who we used to be.

Today, open your heart and mind to the fact that God is calling you to grow. Comfort zones are easy and enjoyable places to be, but nothing beautiful grows there. Step out of your comfort zone and realize that through whatever you’re going through, God is going to make you stronger. Don’t give up. ❤

Do not let your heart be troubled; believe in God, believe also in Me.

John 14:1

Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.

Isaiah 43:18-19

Song Recommendation, New Day, by Danny Gokey: https://youtu.be/0TrKXehB0pg

The God of Feelings

Do you ever worry about your feelings being too big for God? Here’s some advice and encouragement!

I’ve often spoken of how God isn’t a “God of feelings”. He’s so much bigger than that, loyal, faithful, honest, and never-changing. His love is so different from the fleeting love we experience in many relationships.

While all of that is true and important to recognize, I’ve realized I may have done an incredible disservice to you. By speaking so joyfully about God in this way, I may have misled you into believing that He doesn’t have feelings, that feelings don’t have a place in our world. But believe me, feelings do have an important place, and God does have feelings too.

I’ve seen the consequences of not “believing in feelings” firsthand within my own family. I used to think it was just my family, but during the recent spread of awareness about the issues Asian Americans have faced, I’m beginning to realize it’s cultural. It’s a known fact that there’s a stigma around mental health in the Asian American community, often because our mental health has not been seen as important in the past. For my dad’s side of the family, expressing any kind of feeling (other than indifference) is seen as a weakness.

Both my dad and my grandma, whenever they mention a loss or a difficulty, laugh it off to prove they are okay. I’ve never seen either of them cry. They literally live out the line from Let it Go, “Conceal, don’t feel, don’t let them know.” Whenever I share a hardship with them, they merely shrug and act like I’m an idiot for being the least bit concerned.

But I know those feelings are deep within them. When our dog passed away last year, my dad clung onto compulsive actions in an attempt to unknowingly cope. The stress lines and the frown on his face indicate his anxiety. Yet if asked, it will be received with harsh reprimands for ever assuming anything’s not fine. It deeply saddens me to see them suffering like this. The negative feelings won’t dissipate simply because we choose to ignore them. Rather, they continue to bubble up until we are forced to confront them, often by this point in an unhealthy way.

I think Christians often fall into the trap of making everyone think they have to be fine in order to be a Christian. “You must not trust God if you are sad or disappointed,” they often say. “Everything happens for a reason, and if you don’t believe that fully at every given moment, then you must not be saved!”

But that’s not true. If our faith was dependent on never having a single doubt or wavering moment, then our faith wouldn’t be much of anything. Our faith is built on God’s grace and forgiveness. When we get out on the water with Him and falter, He will stretch out His hand and rescue us. And those moments of truly needing His saving is what strengthens our faith the most.

When we’re close to God, we know His character. He isn’t going to turn away from us when we have tear stains on our cheeks. He isn’t going to laugh at us when we come to Him in bits and pieces after our heart’s been broken. He isn’t going to mock us when we are asking for forgiveness.

Rather, He is going to be there waiting for us, excited when we turn to Him through everything we’re feeling.

It’s when we don’t know God’s character that we fear coming to Him as anything less than perfect. Well, let me tell you, God knows darn well that we aren’t perfect! He knows our every thought and feeling. He hears every whispered cry and every quiet call for help.

But guess what? God isn’t afraid of what you’re feeling.

God is so much more powerful than what we’re feeling. He has given us this life, and these feelings, in order to bring us closer to Him and to each other. So don’t deny the fact that you have feelings. Rather, see how these feelings may be prompting you to show other’s God’s love.

One of the greatest marks of a follower of Christ is compassion. I once read in a Bible study that compassion is “love in action”. It requires stepping into another person’s shoes and feeling what they are feeling. We can’t show compassion if we deny ourselves our right to feel.

We can’t control how we feel, but we can control what we do with those feelings. If you are worried about your feelings taking over your life, then remember that you can allow God to use those feelings for good.

No matter how you’re feeling today, your feelings are valid. They matter. But they certainly won’t ever define who you are in Christ.

Lord, you have examined me

    and know all about me.

2 You know when I sit down and when I get up.

    You know my thoughts before I think them.

3 You know where I go and where I lie down.

    You know everything I do.

4 Lord, even before I say a word,

    you already know it.

Psalm 139:1-4

Song Recommendation: Broken Prayers, by Riley Clemmons: https://youtu.be/cBDt_-tIfLI

Known

Do you ever wish you knew what God would say to your questions?

Do you have that person in your life that you know so incredibly well, you feel like you can read their minds? You know their answer to your question before you even ask, and you could answer for them if need be. You know how they feel about situations, what advice they’d probably give you, and what each distinct facial expression means.

Yesterday, I had a moment with my mom that freaked her out. She started explaining a situation, and without even being a sentence into it, I knew exactly who she was talking about and my answer to her unspoken question. I’d like to think I have superpowers, but in reality it’s likely because she and I have been spending way more time together due to the pandemic. That’s what it takes to fully know someone, spending lots of time with them and watching their reactions to similar situations.

So many times I’ve wished to know God’s answers to all my questions and decisions. Then I wouldn’t experience doubt or regret. I’ve often heard people say that they’d have a relationship with God if they could hear His voice. As Christians, we often worry about pleasing God, and second-guess everything because we aren’t sure if we’re doing what God wants us to.

But here’s the thing: even if we never hear God audibly speak, we can still know His answers to every single question and concern we have.

Now, you might be half-way through an eye roll, thinking, “Great, Hannah’s going to suggest reading the Bible and praying more. Heard that one before.”

Well…yes. But I’m not going to just leave you with that.

You see, we can know God just as well as we know that one person in our lives fully. By spending time with God, we can figure out how He’d react to certain situations. By listening to how God reacted to other situations in the past, (hint hint, through the Bible), we can see how He might react to situations now. The best part about God is that He never changes His mind. He will never take away the gift of grace and salvation He’s given us. He will never suddenly stop loving us. His plan will always come to completion at the right time.

So, if you have the desire to know what God thinks, which is wonderful if you do, then spend more time with God. Even spending an extra few minutes in the Word can bring so much clarity. And prayer…that’s so underrated. Praying can truly make miracles happen. Praying can bring you peace when you thought you could never feel remotely content again. Most of all, prayer is a conversation with God, and what better way to get to know Him than talk with Him?

God knows you fully and loves you, not despite, but because of who you are. When you feel like no one really gets you or you don’t feel like explaining yourself, go to God. He already knows and He’s ready to welcome you with open arms.

But if anyone loves God, he is known by Him.

1 Corinthians 8:3

I am the good shepherd, and I know My own and My own know Me.

John 10:14

Song suggestion: Known, by Tauren Wells: https://youtu.be/gbQ6Lfh5L14