motivation – Page 2 – The Will to Wake Up

What If…It’s Gonna Be Okay?

Hope for when life is confusing.

I don’t know about you, but for me, when life doesn’t go the way I hoped, I start questioning all my decisions. I get angry at myself for not choosing the opposite choice, assuring myself that if I had only known better, things wouldn’t have ended up this way. If I had picked a different school, became friends with someone else, researched more before making a choice…the list of what ifs could go on and on.

But what if…

The reason why you didn’t know was so that you could grow?

Just think about it. If you hadn’t made that mistake, would you still be the person you are today? If you hadn’t gotten into that rough situation, would you still be the compassionate and understanding individual you are now? You may not feel strong, but the truth is, with every difficult season, you are growing into a stronger person.

And what’s the worst that could happen if you dare to believe that the future is bright? What if this isn’t the end? What if this is the beginning of something amazing?

I once heard that the one thing that elevates humans above other species is our imagination. This imagination can cause our minds to run wild with fears, doubts, and questions. Questions that trap us in the past, ruminating over all the scenarios that could have been.

But I like to think of imagination as one of life’s greatest blessings. What if your imagination allows you to see the potential in others, the light that God has placed inside each of us? What if your imagination restores your hope in yourself?

You can be rest assured that no matter what your life looks like right now, yes, you are capable of good things. Yes, there is more ahead of you. Yes, you aren’t a mistake.

Today, on the day dedicated to gratitude, I want you to soak in the goodness of God’s promises. He calls you chosen. Forgiven. Blessed. Chosen. Loved.

When we focus on all we have to be grateful for, our hope is restored. We aren’t sugarcoating the past or only focusing on its downfalls. We are recognizing how both the good and the painful have shaped us into who we are today.

And that person, no matter how you are showing up today, is amazing.

So thankful for you. ❤

For everything God created is good, and nothing is to be rejected if it is received with thanksgiving, because it is consecrated by the word of God and prayer.
1 Timothy 4:4-5

Praise the Lord. Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; his love endures forever.
Psalm 106:1

Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good;

his love endures forever.
1 Chronicles 16:34

More Than You Can Bear

Are you feeling overwhelmed, wondering where Jesus is in the midst of all you’re going through?

Sometimes, life just feels like too much. One thing after another, spiraling into a season of chaos. And when one stressful season ends, it feels as though another is just around the corner. During these times of uncertainty, you may only have the energy to ask God one simple thing: “Why?”.

To be honest, I’ve been asking God “why” a lot recently. Why this school, why these feelings, why don’t I understand?

What are some questions you have for God? Maybe they are related to your mental or physical health, or perhaps an important relationship in your life. There are countless things to question God about; the tough thing is waiting for an answer.

Yesterday, I was feeling overwhelmed by the burden of wanting to do whatever I can to help others, yet not knowing where to start. I was reading about how my generation, Gen Z, is considered a “lost generation” due to the high levels of anxiety, depression, and overall despair. Everyone feels…alone. All they want is to feel something, which leads to an assortment of harmful behaviors that take the place of being fully cared for and embraced.

Do you ever read Bible verses that make you frustrated? Often these are verses that are designed to make us feel better, yet when they don’t, they almost feel like a mockery of our pain. We read verses about Jesus carrying our burdens and our joy being complete through Him, but when we feel hopeless, heavy, and tired, these promises become empty words.

So often, we expect Jesus to be like another person: fallible. We avoid calling out to Him because we assume our emotions are too much for Him or that He won’t follow through in time, if ever. And when we do call out, sometimes nothing changes for a while.

All we have left is our weak, exhausted soul calling out for help and clarity.

When I hear about all the things people are struggling with, I want to scream at the top of my lungs, “Where are you, Jesus?”. But for some reason, that feels wrong. How can I scream at the One who is the source of my joy and peace? He literally saved me. Shouldn’t that be enough?

But here’s the thing: Jesus doesn’t expect us to be satisfied just with His earthly appearance and sacrifice thousands of years ago. That’s why He’s given us the Holy Spirit, called our Advocate, to speak on behalf of us.

Jesus, God, the Holy Spirit…they are all-powerful, incomparable, divine beings who want to be in relationship with you.

The Holy Spirit is inside you, feeling everything you’re feeling, enraged about everything that bothers you, and desperately fighting for you. And when you take the time to listen, really listen, and look for the ways Jesus is showing you He’s there, maybe this burden won’t feel so lonely.

Last night, I wrote in my prayer journal, as I always do, yet I couldn’t feel Jesus. I couldn’t really feel anything except frustration and fear. I asked Jesus what I should do, but I didn’t hear anything. A little while later, I opened up my Bible to continue reading Nehemiah.

In that chapter, Nehemiah was assigning tasks to those helping him do God’s work of restoring a city that had previously been oppressed. One particular character caught my eye, a “faithful person who feared God more than most”. This man was given an important task, a task that was clearly not for the faint of heart. However, Nehemiah, through the guidance of God, knew he could handle it because of his obedience and dedication to God.

Right in that moment, I felt Jesus speaking to me, reminding me that He has given me this life because He knows that I can make good use of it. He knows that it’s hard, but He has equipped me with everything I need to carry on.

I believe that Jesus is telling you the same thing. No matter what you are going through, Jesus is right beside you. He is waiting for you to call out to Him. He wants everything, even your toughest questions. He’s making a way for you, even if you can’t see it yet.

I encourage you to make the time to simply rest with Jesus. Allow yourself to step away from the world and let His Spirit of peace fill your mind and heart. You never know what may come out of it, perhaps even a change in perspective and a renewal of hope.

Jesus promises to never give us more than we can bear. He knows you, He loves you, and He is ready to transform you into the person you are meant to be.

Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.
James 1:2-4

God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.
1 Corinthians 10:13

A song recommendation if you need encouragement: It’s Gonna Get Better, by The Young Escape: https://youtu.be/DDSNoibW41M

Dreaming of a Better Tomorrow

Is there a dream or a passion that you long to pursue, yet fear of displeasing God or others is holding you back?

I’m sure you’ve heard the expression “follow your dreams”. Christians enjoy bashing this phrase because it doesn’t indicate aligning your life with God’s will. While I agree that God’s will should come first in our lives, we also need to realize that our dreams and passions are often from God and should be heard. In fact, we can fall into the trap of using our interpretation of God’s will as an excuse to not go out and do what would make a difference.

How often have you not done something because you thought, “Oh, I haven’t heard explicitly from God that I’m supposed to do this, so it must mean I shouldn’t”?

We limit ourselves when we believe that God’s will fits into a box. If we don’t have the exact qualifications, then we don’t believe we’ll ever be capable. If we don’t have the financial support, then God must be calling someone else with more money.

We use these human excuses to prevent us from actually doing God’s will. We allow our fear of failure diminish the possibility of having an extraordinary legacy.

Here’s the thing: A lot of times, we don’t follow our dreams out of good intention. We think that we can’t enjoy doing God’s will.

Your heart is in the right place. However, I want to free you from this line of thinking.

God has given you your specific gifts and passions for a reason. In the world God created before brokenness entered, there were jobs for people to do, but He made sure they were meaningful. I’ll take the liberty of assuming that Adam enjoyed naming all the animals and Eve appreciated interacting with the creatures of the garden. A portion of their daily life was centered around being with God. That is within our calling as well.

You may be wondering if your dreams are in line with God’s will because certainly there are things that God wouldn’t tell you to do. Here are a few factors I take into consideration when determining whether or not I should pursue a dream:

It does not go against anything in the Bible.
You have a sense of peace, even if the circumstances seem impossible.
You have had people or opportunities that have affirmed this gifting.
After praying about it, some of your fears weaken.
You believe it could make a difference, even if the difference seems small.

God never changes, which means He will always encourage you to do things that bring restoration, hope, love, and truth into the world. Don’t let a dream labeled as “hard” or “unobtainable” discourage you. If something has never been done before, then perhaps you’ll be the first to do it. No one can make the exact same impact as you.

On a more personal note, a dream I’ve had since childhood has been writing books. Clearly I love writing, and over time, my passion for encouraging others has caused this love to deepen. A few weeks ago, God gave me the inspiration and time to create a short story photo book designed to encourage people. After it came together, I felt like God wanted me to publish it.

Yet scrolling through countless advice articles, watching helpful videos, and looking at my bank account, my enthusiasm began to dwindle. I waited for the proof (the author’s first copy) to come in the mail, but I decided it was just too hard and not good enough to publish.

But after showing the book to a few trusted people in my life, I began to sense God leading me towards publishing it again. The thought of bringing hope to others through my writing lifted a burden off my shoulders and ignited a fire within my heart. Once I said yes to the call, doors have begun opening up for me.

I know it won’t be easy. I doubt it will be a bestseller. But if it brings hope and light into at least one life, I know it will all be worth it.

You may not see the fruit of your hard work or the “proof of success” within your dream field. That can be extremely discouraging, but it doesn’t mean you aren’t making a difference. It just means that God is calling you to trust Him. Behind the scenes, He is always working. Nothing is impossible for you with God by your side.

God did this so that, by two unchangeable things in which it is impossible for God to lie, we who have fled to take hold of the hope set before us may be greatly encouraged.
Hebrews 6:18

One Step at a Time

Are you overwhelmed by the chaos of life?

First of all, can I just say how excited I am to be writing an Encouragement Thursday article this week? I have taken a break from them since moving and starting classes, but they bring me so much joy, especially when I get to hear how they’ve encouraged you.

You are the reason why I keep writing! (Apart from God’s calling of course ;)) So I’m very thankful to be able to be part of this community alongside you.

Anyway, back to the regularly scheduled program, the reason you originally clicked on this article! 🙂

What words come to mind when you think about fall? I think about the colorful leaves, the changing seasons, and the busyness that comes with all these changes.

When things get busy, it’s easy to get stuck in our heads. We get so focused on our goals and all the things we want to be or do and haven’t achieved yet. We forget to look around at the bright autumn leaves or feel the soothing drops of rain against our faces. When our fingers are wrapped around our dreams too tightly, we miss out on living in the present. In our minds, we are already in the future.

But living in future isn’t real, is it? This future that we’ve created for ourselves hasn’t happened. It may never happen. We get all stressed out about it, but it isn’t here yet.

And when we are so set on one idea of what our life is supposed to look like, we begin to lose our true passion and desire for it. It feels obligatory; do we really want this future or did we predestine it for ourselves?

Well, I have some good news. We can’t predestine anything. God is the One who has prepared the path ahead of us and when we listen to Him, our lives will begin to feel purposeful again.

Sometimes, we don’t take a break because we are avoiding something. Maybe we don’t feel ready to say goodbye so we bury ourselves in our work instead. Or perhaps we don’t want to accept that things are different, so we focus our energy on incorporating the past into the future.

We don’t want to feel weak, and for some strange reason, resting is seen as a weakness in our culture.

But here’s the thing: Jesus even demonstrated the need for rest.

I know you’re probably expecting me to bring up the 7th day of creation, but I actually found a new story that has resonated deeper with me on the subject of rest and processing grief.

Jesus was very close to his cousin, John the Baptist. John was the one preaching about Jesus, after all. Surely the tight-knit relationship between their mothers affected their bond as well. So when Jesus found out about his loved one dying a brutal death, it weighted heavily on Him.

I’ve heard the gruesome story of John’s death many times, but I never paid attention to Jesus’ response until rereading the story last night.

Here it is according to the gospel of Matthew:

When Jesus heard what had happened, he withdrew by boat privately to a solitary place.
Matthew 14:13

Read that again. What did Jesus do? He withdrew privately to a solitary place. Jesus knew His limits. He knew that He needed to take the time to process His grief. He was aware of the need for rest and encourages us to follow in His footsteps.

And what did that rest do for Him?

When Jesus landed and saw a large crowd, he had compassion on them and healed their sick.
Matthew 14:14

That’s right! It strengthened Him enough to continue healing others and even feed the five thousand later on in the passage.

When we are just going, going, going, we miss out on the opportunity to present our best selves. We can’t fully pour into others without first pouring into ourselves. The way to pour into ourselves is drinking the living water Jesus provides. Reading the Bible, praying, listening to encouraging music, journaling, participating in a life-giving hobby or activity…the list could go on. Simply being present no matter where you’re at.

I often struggle with wanting to go full-speed ahead into things…which leads to immediate burn out. Once things don’t happen at the speed I want them to, I get discouraged and question my calling and abilities. God doesn’t want us to do that. Instead, He wants us to be present where He’s calling us in the moment. Not in the future, because the future will come soon enough, but right where He wants us now.

Each day you are taking one step closer to where God wants you to be. But those steps don’t have to be giant leaps. They can be little, itty bitty steps. And that’s okay. In fact, that’s amazing. Just take life one step at a time, and it will begin to feel less overwhelming.

But the plans of the Lord stand firm forever,
the purposes of his heart through all generations.
Psalm 33:11

Take a Deep Breath

Have you been feeling burned out lately? Here is an invitation to rest and invite God’s peace to fill your troubled heart today.

Do you ever just feel…burned out?

Maybe everything is crumbling around you. Perhaps you have had an increased workload or a new person is in your life who demands a lot of your attention and energy. Or maybe things are just…normal?

Honestly, don’t feel bad if normal is exhausting. Especially now, life still amidst a pandemic, living in a world full of brokenness and selfishness and division.

But maybe that isn’t the whole world. Maybe, despite things feeling as though they are getting worse, there is still room for gentleness.

Last weekend was particularly rough for me. I won’t go into detail, but I witnessed the reality of our broken world. I felt powerless as people in need surrounded me and all I could do was take care of my own safety. And even then, I couldn’t protect a friend when she was harassed by a stranger. As I turned left and right, I saw how truly divided we have become. We think we’ve made progress in loving others and cultivating peace, but have we really? This weekend has planted an image in my mind of what Jesus meant when He described the evil we will face in the world.

Perhaps you’ve experienced something similar lately, a fresh slap of reality right in the face. It hurts, doesn’t it?

When you get hurt, it isn’t usually the initial contact that stings the most. It’s the sharpness that penetrates through your body until it’s all you can think about. It resonates deeply within you, leaving a lasting imprint. A scar that symbolizes a point in your journey.

But that is what it is–a point. It’s not the beginning, it’s not the end. It’s not the whole story. Your life has scars and it will get more scars as you keep going. But with every scar comes the rebuilding of skin, a healing process.

Though the healing process brings revival and joy back into your life, it doesn’t always feel beneficial at first. Be gentle with yourself as you take a look at what is causing the pain in your life. Change is hard and it’s important to just take it one step at a time.

Close your eyes for a moment and take a deep breath. Recently, I’ve seen the value of breath prayers, aligning your heart with God’s through a few simple words and actions. When you inhale, you will pray a few words. As you exhale, you will finish the prayer.

Pray with me:

Inhale: Jesus, my Protector

Exhale: Fill me with Your peace.

Allow yourself to feel the meaning of these words. Jesus offers us unexplainable, never ending peace with Him. No matter what’s going on, you can rest in His faithfulness.

But in my distress I cried out to the LORD; yes, I prayed to my God for help. He heard me from his sanctuary; my cry to him reached his ears.
Psalm 18:6

Never worry about anything. Instead, in every situation let your petitions be made known to God through prayers and requests, with thanksgiving. Then God’s peace, which goes far beyond anything we can imagine, will guard your hearts and minds in union with the Messiah Jesus.
Philippians 4:6-7

When the Burden Feels Heavy

Jesus promises that the burden of being a Christian is light. However, in a world full of so much darkness and pain, showing God’s love can feel anything but easy. So how can we move forward when being a Christian isn’t comfortable?

I’ve often been stumped by this verse, Matthew 11:30, “For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” In context, these words are spoken by Jesus, when He is encouraging His disciples. Not only does Jesus promise to give us an “easy” workload and a “light” burden, He says, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”

Now, I don’t know about you, but these verses hit different these days. Our world is going through a lot. We’re going through a lot. A lot of heavy, difficult, and painful things. So when Jesus tells us to come to Him and find rest, it’s an irresistible offer.

Nothing about this verse is confusing when it’s simply words on a page. Hearing about how delightful and refreshing being a Christian is sounds great, right? But then, when we’re on the battlefield for our faith, literally and figuratively, we begin to doubt the validity of these words. Is Jesus really right? If He is, then why is being a Christian so complicated?

Well…we make it complicated. We as in humanity as a whole. You see, my friends, Jesus is not telling us that life will be easy once we become Christian. In fact, these words are spoken in the same chapter as when Jesus’ own cousin, John the Baptist, is in prison. Jesus knows fully that John will be beheaded for his faith, and He also knows that most of the disciples He’s comforting will be persecuted and even killed because of their alliance to Him.

Jesus is no dummy. He knows exactly who He’s talking to, the incredible hardships they will face, and ultimately the end of everyone’s story. He isn’t saying these words to make light of difficulties or to give them false hope. Rather, He is reminding them that their faith gives them reason to always have peace, joy, and hope.

And how, you may ask, can we possibly have peace, joy, and hope during seasons of immense pain and fear? Well, because we can experience the kind of love that casts out all fear, pain, and guilt on a daily basis. Each day, when we spend time with God, we can allow His steady presence to give us rest. Even greater than that, as Christians, we have the Holy Spirit–literally God!–living inside us. To clear up any confusion, this does NOT mean we are God. Rather, it means that God wants to be with us so much, He has chosen to live inside of us so that He will be with us always.

Some of the sweetest words to hear are “I miss you”. God went one step farther than saying “I miss you”. Rather, He realized that He’d miss us so much if He wasn’t with us 24/7, He made a way for us to be together always. He’s with you on the cold, dark nights. He’s with you during scary walks alone. He’s with you when you’re facing your giants, your triggers, and your greatest fears. He’s with you through it all.

Sometimes, though, this burden that gets placed on us as Christians can feel really heavy. We are called to care about everyone, especially those hurting. When we see news headlines of people being persecuted or children being harmed or rights being taken away, we may start to panic. When we are walking alongside someone going through indescribable heartache, we may feel drained as we absorb their pain. How can this burden possibly feel light?

Earlier this year, God placed someone in my life who I knew was directly from God. I didn’t know what this person was going through when we first got connected, yet I knew God wanted me to be especially intentional in my friendship with him. Over time, I started to learn what he was going through, and I did everything I could to be there for him. At first, I felt truly honored to be chosen to be a prayer warrior and friend to him. But after a while, things started to get increasingly difficult. I lost my enthusiasm for doing God’s will in this relationship, mostly because the “next right step” seemed less clear than before. When not hearing answers right away or knowing whether or not my efforts were appreciated, I struggled to keep my hope in God. Yet I knew I had to keep going, because the burden this person was carrying was too heavy for him to carry alone.

You may be in a similar situation right now, where you aren’t sure how God is using you, but you are feeling overloaded by another person’s burden. This work of God felt exciting for a time, but now merely feels heavy. You want to be motivated to do God’s work, yet it gets draining after a while. You may be called out of your comfort zone or faced with opposition, and you aren’t sure what to do next. This burden is anything but light.

As I’ve pondered these verses over and over again, a new revelation has come upon me. We, as Christians, cannot make the burden light on our own. Rather, the key to not feeling burned out by what we’re called to do is following Jesus’ example. Jesus actually says this quite clearly in these verses by reminding us of the importance of rest and seeing how gentle and humble His heart is.

You see, burdens often feel heavy when they require us to go out on a limb for someone. When we get embarrassed or when we must sacrifice something, we start wondering where the exit is. And when we pour everything into a situation or relationship, we don’t take the time to rest and spend time with God, we get tired. Jesus, despite coming here to save the entire world, took time to rest. He took time to be with His Father. He made sure to build that into His schedule.

There isn’t a single verse in the Bible that says Jesus was embarrassed. Yet Jesus is the literal definition of humility. He washed people’s feet. He dined with the “scum of civilization”. He chatted with people labeled as “extreme sinners”. Jesus went above and beyond the call of duty. He demonstrated true love.

And when we follow Jesus’ example, our hearts become more and more like His. We are no longer embarrassed by seemingly odd things God calls us to do. We are no longer afraid to reach out and be there for people who may not expect our help. We can feel free to be exactly who God wants us to be while still having time to rest and take care of ourselves as well.

Today, your heart might feel extremely heavy. Perhaps you just received news of a friend dealing with a tragic loss. Maybe your loved one is struggling with a problem so big, the best thing you can do is pray. Or possibly the person experiencing pain is you. Maybe the burden has been placed directly on your shoulders and you’re searching for God’s peace and comfort.

I want you to read Jesus’ words and feel comforted by them. Realize that when we allow Jesus to carry the burden alongside us, the burden is light. When we see every call to help someone as an opportunity rather than an irritating interruption, the work will feel easy. We aren’t called to stay in our comfort zones. Rather, we’re called to be comforted by Jesus as we walk through the fire together.

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
Matthew 11:28-30

I will come down and speak with you there, and I will take some of the power of the Spirit that is on you and put it on them. They will share the burden of the people with you so that you will not have to carry it alone.
Numbers 11:17

The Lord replied, “My Presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.”
Exodus 33:14

Boundaries: All I Learned From My Mistakes

Are you feeling burned out, as though the weight of the world is on your shoulders? Today I’ll be sharing everything I learned from my mistakes when it comes to making boundaries with people.

You’ve tried so hard to be nice. Now, though, things are catching up to you and you still see no reward. Your boss never gave you the promotion or recognition. The person you like still treats you like trash. Your family is only piling on more demands.

I think it’s pretty clear why we need boundaries:

For our own mental health

People who struggle with boundaries also often struggle with self-esteem. They believe they have to earn their way into someone’s heart by doing things for them, even at the cost of their own peace and time.

For our energy

When we are taking on too many tasks or carrying too many emotional burdens, we get exhausted. When we’re not rested, we aren’t helping anyone. We are often grumpy, not seeing situations clearly, and lacking in joy. Rest is so important, yet often put at the back-burner, and neglected when we take on too much.

For our relationships

Any good relationship of any kind deserves to be built on respect. But if one person acts like the workhorse of another, then there certainly isn’t respect happening. But it’s not just the person without boundaries who’s lacking respect. It’s also the person doing all the work. When we don’t make boundaries, we get annoyed at the people we are serving, and resent them more and more over time.

How Making Boundaries Changed My Life

I’ll be honest–I used to be terrible at making boundaries! Especially at church, because I thought it was wrong to say no to good opportunities. But the truth is, there will always be some opportunities that seem good, but just aren’t meant for us. Even now, I occasionally struggle, but I have grown a lot from my mistakes. Hopefully you won’t have to make the same ones as me, but if you have already, perhaps this will help you learn from your mistakes too.

Mistake #1: Repaying, and Repaying, and Repaying…

We all have that one person in our lives. You know the one. They act all friendly when they want something, eager to do anything for you. But then, once they do one favor for you, suddenly you’re indebted to them for life!

I’ve had this happen to me on multiple occasions, but most recently it occurred with a person at my church. She was a great help to me by offering to assist me in my college search and giving me wise advice. She even gave me some experiences I lacked in my college application process that required her time and energy. When I ended up choosing the college she recommended, I felt even more grateful to her.

However, we had a meeting shortly after this happened, where she asked me to help with three different ministries. I love all three of them– children’s ministry, youth ministry, and the host team. I wanted to help with all of them, and I had planned on helping with two. Yet, I was feeling swamped between my new job and demanding course load, which I had already told her about. But because she had done so much for me, the least I could do was agree to these commitments, right?

As I began to work more with her, my joy and affection for my church dwindled. I hardly ever got to listen to the sermon. I was frustrated working under her because I found out she wasn’t clear on giving directions or generous with appreciation. The other leaders I was working with were cold towards me. The students in one ministry seemed more interested in their phones than in even answering “how are you?”.

The worst part was that I blamed myself. The truth was, I could’ve said no. I could’ve told her I only had time to be involved in one or two of those ministries. Then perhaps I would’ve enjoyed my time at church more and would’ve connected more deeply to the people I was serving. I was also irritated that her sacrifice of one day to help me had to be repaid with an entire year’s worth of service.

It’s easy to get pressured into saying yes when we feel guilty for someone else helping us. But we always have to make decisions with the right intentions. Serving in ministry is a wonderful thing, but even that can be done for the wrong reasons. Same with other tasks that seem like good or kind things. You will enjoy life to the fullest when you start saying yes because Jesus tells you to rather than out of obligation.

Mistake #2: Trying to Be Someone’s Hero

Let’s be honest, the easiest way to boost our self-esteem is when we find someone who is immediately drawn to us and wants us to rescue them from their difficulties. We want to be their only source of assistance and advice. We want to be the one they rely on.

But the truth is, besides the fact that should never try taking the place of God, it’s also incredibly exhausting playing “hero”. When we don’t live up to our own expectations, we feel like failures. It discourages us from reaching out in the future. If the person suddenly doesn’t need us anymore, then we feel resentful towards them, feeling betrayed.

I have tried being someone’s “hero” before, but I actually learned this lesson best when someone else tried to be my hero.

A few years ago, I was in a difficult place. I didn’t have very many friends or people to confide in. I never stood up for myself. Then came along an older friend who was more than willing to listen, hang out with me, and introduce me to others. She would say how similar we were to each other, which now I wonder was her way of reassuring herself that her influence over me was working.

I believe she honestly thought she had good intentions. She cared about me and wanted me to feel connected. But not connected without her.

After growing a lot as a person, I began expressing my own views, taking on leadership positions, and making new friends. I wasn’t telling her my deepest fears or secrets anymore. I had new people to share things with or I was able to process things with God. I didn’t need her in the sense that I was dependent on her anymore. I obviously wanted to stay friends with her, and at the time, I hadn’t realized I was her “project”.

I found that out the hard way when we butted heads on a very personal issue, a decision I wanted to make that truly didn’t involve her. However, she had probed until I told her about it, and suddenly she wanted to take over. What shocked her the most was when I disagreed with her. I was no longer this “infant” who needed to be guided, babied, and nurtured. Instead, I was her equal, a person who had her own views and could handle herself.

The thing we argued about came and went. I’m sure I’ll even forget about it eventually. But the thing I’ll never forget is how hurt I was when I realized our friendship was built on her desire to be my savior rather than my companion.

If you really care about someone, don’t try to be their hero. Instead, point them to the only one who can really save them: Jesus.

Mistake #3: Pleasing the Wrong Person

I’ve mentioned people-pleasing many times, and that’s because I struggle with it a lot. I’ve talked myself into believing that nothing can compare to the burst of joy I feel when making someone happy, even when it’s at the cost of my own well-being or my faith.

I have so many instances of people-pleasing that we could be here all day. However, I’ll share of when I felt most convicted about it.

My mom and I were discussing a few responsibilities we had taken on and how we felt we couldn’t speak up on issues we felt passionately about for fear of angering the people we were working with. We’ve ruminated over this topic countless times, mostly because of how frustrated we feel.

Afterwards, I went to do my daily Bible reading, and I started the book of Galatians. Then right there, it was as though God was speaking right to me.

“If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.”
Galatians 1:10

Whoa. To be honest, up until that point, I didn’t think the phrase “please people/people please” was even in the Bible! But the more I thought about it, the more I realized how right Paul was in this sentiment.

When we work towards pleasing people, whether by ignoring the way they talk about people we love, taking on too many of their unwanted tasks, or doing things for them that we wouldn’t normally do, we aren’t pleasing the one that we should care most about: Jesus. People pleasing can be an idol in our lives because we put people before Jesus. We can only have one master, will it be Jesus or the fear of displeasing others?

So Now What?

You might feel embarrassed or ashamed, but don’t be. It can take a long time before we realize we are valued enough by God to not seek validation from others. Sometimes it takes a lifetime to realize that. God understands our desire to make others feel loved, and sometimes that starts off by not having boundaries, and ends up being something healthier.

When discerning whether or not to say yes to something, ask God for His wisdom. He promises to give it out generously. Also ask yourself whether or not you need to trust Jesus if you say yes. If an experience will bring you closer to Him, then it is always worthwhile. But make sure you are still carving out time in your day to rest and spend time with God.

Here are a few books I’ve found helpful when it comes to making boundaries:

The Best Yes, by Lysa TerKeurst

Boundaries, by Henry Cloud

What Happens When Women Say Yes to God, by Lysa TerKeurst

The lot is cast into the lap,
But its every decision is from the Lord.
Proverbs 16:33

But if serving the LORD seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your ancestors served beyond the Euphrates, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living. But as for me and my household, we will serve the LORD.
Joshua 24:15

No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other.
Matthew 6:24

Why Do I Write?

I’ll be sharing what inspires me to write, as well as how important it is to shine our light to the world!

Recently, I shared how important it is to ask ourselves “why” every now and then. Though intentions aren’t the same as actions, (no one will know if you brought a meal over to your friend because you felt sympathy towards them or you wanted to get rid of old food), intentions do make a world of difference. Asking “why” can help us during the decision making process as well.

Over the past year, I’ve been asking myself, “Why do I write?” I’ve been asked this question, or rather, “Why do I want to be an English major?”, many times. Often the ones asking me this question are disappointed I didn’t become a pastor or a teacher (what they all predicted I would be), or they have genuine curiosity.

When God calls us to do something, we shouldn’t feel the need to justify it to others. However, for our own personal reasons, we should explore why God calls us to certain endeavors.

So, since you all have come with me on my writing journey, I thought I’d share why I write!

Why do I write?

If you had asked me this question a few years ago, my honest answer would’ve been quite…vain. I never felt listened to growing up, and the only way I felt seen was through my writing. I wanted to be a famous author to prove everyone wrong. “Hannah Chung can do things! She isn’t this quiet kid in the back of the room without thoughts and feelings of her own!”

If you haven’t believed I’ve been completely honest until now, hopefully that confession brings confirmation that yes, I am telling all the embarrassing details of my life! 🙂

Two years ago, when I experienced a spiritual revival, my reason for writing changed. I used prayer journaling as a way of processing grief and dark feelings. That brought me closer to God and changed the my “writing voice”.

I’m an definitely in a much different place than I was two years ago. Writing restores my hope and nourishes my soul. When I put my pen to paper, the world fades around me, and it’s just me and God. I’ve witnessed people living under the radar of others and I want to give them a voice. For all the years I felt unseen, I want to spend now making others seen.

Last summer, I was under the false belief that people had to be pastors in order to minister to others. Perhaps that’s why I wanted to be a pastor, because I wanted to dedicate my life to God. Though my passion was (and is) writing.

But that’s not true. We can be a teacher and show children God’s love. We can be an accountant and show someone God’s grace. We can be a lawyer and show someone God’s mercy. And yes, we can be a writer and show someone God’s understanding. We might be the only Jesus a person sees and we can demonstrate His attributes in any profession.

All those reasons contribute to why I write, but the main reason is this: I am closest to Jesus when I am inspired.

I can’t really explain how it feels, but I’ll do my best. When I’m inspired, it’s like a fire is burning within my chest, words and ideas, and most of all, love, fills my soul. I have a new understanding of life. Things just make sense. It’s like fitting the last puzzle piece into the puzzle. Everything clicks. My fingers can fly across the keyboard fast enough. I feel physically lighter as I pour out the feelings and ideas Jesus gives me onto blank pages.

I find my inspiration most often when I’m experiencing difficulties. Several years ago, I had a dry season, lacking inspiration, and I almost considered giving up writing. But then it felt like the world was crashing all around me. Everything I had believed in was gone. All except Jesus’ love.

And that’s when I knew I had to reach others the way Jesus has reached me.

I may not be the most popular person, I likely won’t end up being famous. I don’t have a thousand or even a hundred readers. But I cherish each and every one of you. Even on the posts that don’t have any likes, I feel fulfilled because at least I have done my part to share what Jesus has taught me.

When we set a fire, it spreads. We must be a light in the world, not hidden under a lamp shade, but spreading to everyone, even those in the dark crevesses.

How will you shine your light today?

You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden; nor does anyone light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on the lampstand, and it gives light to all who are in the house. Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven.
Matthew 5:14-16

Then Jesus again spoke to them, saying, “I am the Light of the world; he who follows Me will not walk in the darkness, but will have the Light of life.”
John 8:12

Life Hack #3: Honestly…

Sharing one of the best pieces of relationship/friendship advice I’ve ever received.

Growing up, how many times did you hear, “Honesty is the best policy”? Perhaps it was during the plagiarism speech at the beginning of every school year. Or maybe it was in a conversation with your parents after losing a friend over a “little white lie”. But have you applied it to your life as an adult?

Random thought: I almost wonder if I should change this series’ name to “Debunking cliché advice”. Hmm…

Anyway, I’ve given this idea of honesty a lot of thought. I’ve been trying to figure out why it’s hard. I’ve come up with three ideas:

We assume honesty means brashness

When someone tells you, “Just be honest with them”, you might picture yourself walking up to a person and crushing their dreams. Or maybe you think honesty means never using tact when talking about a controversial issue.

Well…how should I put this? No! That’s how our society has gotten honesty wrong, especially in light of all the recent tension and civil unrest.

It’s important to be true to your beliefs, especially when standing up for others or for your faith. But it’s also important to realize that people don’t come to their ideas overnight. It has taken years of experiences, pain, and advice from a variety of sources to get them where they are today. So when sharing your views, realize that part of honest means honestly listening to the other side and appreciating them as human beings, even if you don’t agree with them. And you certainly don’t have to agree with them.

Here’s the thing: People will want to listen to you more if you speak the truth in love. People will feel less attacked and more appreciative of where you’re coming from.

2. Honesty takes humility

Ah, humility. This idea revisits us once again, as it seems to do in my own life on a regular basis. We try to run, but we can’t hide from it. Being humble is one of the core attributes of a follower of Christ.

How does honesty take humility, though?

Well, being honest can mean “taking one for the team”. It might mean being the first person to admit you’re nervous about something. Or it could look like sharing your faith even when it isn’t the popular thing to do. Honesty means we’ll have to admit that we aren’t always right, that maybe the thing we were fighting for isn’t the best after all.

And that’s hard. That’s really hard. But if we aren’t honest about those things, we’ll miss out on growing as individuals and in relationships.

3. Honesty means sacrifice

In the movies, when someone makes a startling revelation and reveals the truth, they are often greeting with celebration or victory. But in real life, people may not respond to our honesty in the way we’d like them to. Perhaps it’s a confession of our true feelings, and the other person doesn’t feel the same way. Maybe it’s sharing a controversial viewpoint that sends an old friend away. Whatever it is, if it matters to you, it needs to be shared. Unfortunately, that does often mean losing people. But the true friends, the ones who really care, will be there with you when you show your true self.

Why is honesty so important, anyway?

If being honest takes so much work, why is it so important in life?

Think about it, how has another person’s honesty changed your life? Maybe it was a current significant other making the first move towards building a relationship with you. Perhaps it was a parent admitting their faults and healing some childhood wounds.

Here are a few ways honesty has impacted my life, and as I share, continue to think about your stories too.

Honesty has made me feel more comfortable

A few nights ago, I went to my first social gathering after COVID. I was pretty nervous about seeing a ton of people I hadn’t seen in over a year. Perhaps you’ve also experienced this.

When I first got into the venue, a girl I hadn’t talked to in over two years came up and started chatting with me. I greatly appreciated her efforts, and even more so after what she said next.

“You know,” she said. “I might have seemed forward for coming over here like this, but I really don’t know anyone anymore and I wanted someone to talk to.”

In that moment, that’s what I needed to hear. I wasn’t alone in my nervousness. A gesture she might’ve found awkward or uncomfortable was actually what made me feel comfortable. Her honesty inspired me to reach out to others and be willing to be true to myself.

Honesty significantly impacts the success of romantic relationships

I have a friend who desperately wanted to be in a romantic relationship with someone and she asked for my advice. Though I’ve observed others’ relationships, I didn’t have much personal experience to go off of, so I spoke with a friend who doesn’t know her, so he’d have an unbiased point of view.

I shared with him how my friend has lied about who she likes to her crush and how their relationship has been based off guessing the other person’s feelings and lack of communication.

He replied, “From my experience, particularly my last relationship that didn’t work out, I’d say honesty is the most important thing in relationships. It might already be too late for them.”

And true to his word, once my friend was honest with her crush, she didn’t necessarily receive the response she had been hoping for, but she finally knew the truth. The truth can be hard to swallow, but important for moving forward.

This was also a good reminder to me to start relationships off with honesty rather than trickling it in as time goes on.

Honesty can heal old wounds

As I shared earlier in why some people avoid being honest, there’s this false idea that honesty only hurts people. But the truth is, honesty can be the medicine to a relationship.

I’m currently in a season of transition. Many of my friends are also moving on or moving away, or both. They seem to tie together often.

Anyway, while in a conversation with an old friend who had hurt me in the past, I gingerly brought up how our friendship had ended. I didn’t do in an accusatory way, but in a way that revealed how I had truly felt about the situation. It helped that it happened years ago, so I had time to process and no longer be mad about it.

This brought so much healing and closure to me, and I’m sure to her as well. We were finally able to realize how far we’d come and how we’ve changed as individuals. Honesty takes maturity, I’ll give you that much. That’s why it’s hard. But it’s the only way to find true closure when letting go of the past.

Does God want us to be honest?

Well, I think you can answer that one yourself. But yes, of course He does.

Jesus never sugarcoated things. He was direct, yet also the definition of love. As followers of Jesus, we should strive to do the same thing.

There’s a Proverb that goes, “Wounds from a friend are better than kisses from an enemy”. Are you upset by a person’s honesty right now? Are you doubting yourself for being honest with a loved one?

In the long run, being honest is the only way you’ll truly get places. Today, think about whether your relationships are based on honesty. I guarantee that the ones that are will last far longer than the ones that are not.

Whoever walks in integrity walks securely, but he who makes his ways crooked will be found out.
Proverbs 10:9

And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.
John 8:32

There are six things that the Lord hates, seven that are an abomination to him: haughty eyes, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked plans, feet that make haste to run to evil, a false witness who breathes out lies, and one who sows discord among brothers. My son, keep your father’s commandment, and forsake not your mother’s teaching.
Proverbs 6:16-20

Something a Little Different

Today’s Encouragement Thursday is a podcast episode! I hope you enjoy it!

Hey everyone! I have some *super exciting* news for you! I created a podcast a couple months ago, also called The Will to Wake Up. Today’s Encouragement Thursday post is a podcast episode called The Secret to Life. I hope you enjoy it and let me know what you think!

Episode link: https://anchor.fm/hannah-chung4/episodes/The-Secret-to-Life-evfm07

Podcast link: https://anchor.fm/hannah-chung4

I love you all and hope you have a wonderful rest of your week!

In the same way the Spirit also helps our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we should, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words
Romans 8:26

But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. To him be the glory both now and to the day of eternity. Amen.
2 Peter 3:18