The Prodigal Character

What if our “problem characters” can actually point us–and our readers–to Christ?

“Not all who wander are lost.” ~ J.R.R Tolkien

If you’re a writer, you’ve likely encountered a “problem” character in your stories. The kind that just doesn’t want to do what you tell them to do. Perhaps you were hoping to redeem them in the end, but by the time you reach the last chapter, you’re so frustrated with them that you would rather drop their plot line all together.

Over the past year, I’ve been participating in a novel writing apprenticeship program, which has truly transformed how I understand stories, characters, and themes. For my first project, I wrote about a young woman overcoming her fear of change in order to save her family’s ice cream parlor.

Andie, my protagonist, wasn’t my problem character. Her best friend, Val, was.

In my program, we’re required to go through an extensive planning process before we can draft our story. Even in the initial stages, Val was often critiqued as being “too unhealthy” and “distracting from the main plot.” (A very fair analysis, I will admit.)

By the time I got to drafting, I thought Val was finally reined in as a side character. Until I reached Chapter 8, where it all fell apart.

Val was introduced at her birthday party, where she made a grand entrance in a flashy red gown before having the most passive aggressive conversation with her mom. It went something like:

Val shoots a look at her mom. “Wow, you really don’t know me at all, do you?”

“Valentina,” Mrs. Valores says, her voice never wavering. “What are you talking about?”

Val holds up a carton of almond mocha fudge ice cream. “You know I hate nuts. I can’t believe this. After that whole speech you gave about wanting me here–”

“Valentina, I can assure you that I didn’t order anything with nuts. I do know you, darling. And I want you here–”

“Oh really? So why are you still calling me ‘Valentina’ like we’re strangers, then?” Val demands.

She slams the carton back on the table. I wince, grateful it didn’t burst open.

The irony is that I didn’t know Val very well when I wrote her the first time. Or the second time. It wasn’t until I reread her lines a third time, frustrated beyond measure because she seemed beyond sympathetic, that I realized the issue.

I didn’t love Val.

You might think, “Of course you didn’t. Who would love this stuck-up, irritable character?”

But as her creator, it was my job to love her. The only way for her to be sympathetic to my readers was for me to love her first, and write out of that place instead of only seeing her in a negative light.

I had to ask myself, “How has Val become this way? Why do my other characters love her? What uniquely about her benefits this story and its themes?”

So back to the rewrites I went…and this time, Val transformed into a flawed, but lovable, character. In fact, when a friend read the most recent draft, she said that the plot line with Val was her favorite because it demonstrated the story’s faith themes the clearest. I was over the moon to hear that!

~

How often do we feel like a problem character in the eyes of our creator, God?

And how often do we view others as problem characters, beyond God’s power to heal and redeem?

When we are burdened with shame over our past mistakes, we may feel broken beyond repair. But that mindset neglects to recognize the power of Jesus’ work on the cross to save us from all our sins.

If God thought we were too broken to be worth saving, He never would’ve sent Jesus. He never would’ve let humanity grow beyond Adam and Eve, or saved Noah’s family when He wiped out the rest of humanity.

God offers us chance after chance to come home. And when we fall down at His feet, wearing filthy clothes with tears in our eyes, He reminds us that we are His precious creation. His sons and daughters.

Perhaps these “problem characters” that arise in our stories aren’t so problematic after all. Perhaps they are simply prodigals who will teach us the value of running back home to God rather than wallowing in our shame.

Perhaps they will even be the characters who point readers to Christ.

No matter what you’ve done or how far you’ve fallen, it’s not too late to ask God to be with you. He will always welcome you home.

Our stories of God transforming us day by day are a testament to His faithfulness. Your life story isn’t too messy for God to use to lead others to His love.

I’d encourage you to read the story of The Lost Son from the book of Luke and reflect on God’s deep love for you:

11 Jesus continued: “There was a man who had two sons. 12 The younger one said to his father, ‘Father, give me my share of the estate.’ So he divided his property between them.

13 “Not long after that, the younger son got together all he had, set off for a distant country and there squandered his wealth in wild living. 14 After he had spent everything, there was a severe famine in that whole country, and he began to be in need. 15 So he went and hired himself out to a citizen of that country, who sent him to his fields to feed pigs. 16 He longed to fill his stomach with the pods that the pigs were eating, but no one gave him anything.

17 “When he came to his senses, he said, ‘How many of my father’s hired servants have food to spare, and here I am starving to death! 18 I will set out and go back to my father and say to him: Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. 19 I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired servants.’ 20 So he got up and went to his father.

“But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him.

21 “The son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.’

22 “But the father said to his servants, ‘Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. 23 Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let’s have a feast and celebrate. 24 For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’ So they began to celebrate.

25 “Meanwhile, the older son was in the field. When he came near the house, he heard music and dancing. 26 So he called one of the servants and asked him what was going on. 27 ‘Your brother has come,’ he replied, ‘and your father has killed the fattened calf because he has him back safe and sound.’

28 “The older brother became angry and refused to go in. So his father went out and pleaded with him. 29 But he answered his father, ‘Look! All these years I’ve been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends. 30 But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!’

31 “‘My son,’ the father said, ‘you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. 32 But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’”

Luke 15:11-31 (NIV)

An Ink-Stained Journey

Learning to trust God through the process of becoming an author.

I was scared to pursue becoming an author. Don’t get me wrong; I absolutely love writing. Feeling inspired to create is one of my favorite ways to connect with God.

But when I entered high school, I worried that my passion for writing wasn’t enough. Writing is a competitive business, and it would require both confidence in my skills and humility to take rejection in order to succeed. And most importantly, immense faith in God’s calling.

So I explored other viable career paths–only to hit dead ends. When it was time to choose a university, only one of my options had a creative writing program. As I prayed over my decision, I knew God wanted me to pursue writing. While the thought of becoming a professional writer gave me joy, I soon realized God led me to the decision that required the greatest amount of faith.

Then this choice was posed to me again after I graduated. Even with the awareness of the costs and challenges to come, I chose to continue pursuing writing with the desire to witness God reveal more of His purposes for me.

Over the last six months, I’ve been growing as a writer through participating in a faith-based writing and business program called The Author Conservatory. Through this program, I’ve received mentorship from Christian writers, encouragement and feedback from my peers (fellow aspiring authors), and entrepreneurship training.

The Author Conservatory focuses on building the foundational components of a story so that we can approach both simple and complex topics with grace, respect, and wisdom. One challenge with this has been learning how to plot out the main details of a story rather than beginning the process by drafting. (For my fellow writers out there, I’m more of a pantser! But plotting is growing on me…)

Each novel undergoes four stages of planning: Concept, Character Arc, Synopsis, and Outline. And within those stages are weeks of revising, brainstorming, and rewriting. By the time we’re allowed to draft, it feels like such a reward!

Another aspect that has required humility is receiving an abundance of feedback, particularly from industry professionals, and needing to make changes–sometimes drastic ones–in response to it. But accepting constructive criticism has transformed my work and my perspective.

While the process may feel slow at times, every rewrite, every training, and every bit of new insight draws us closer to becoming professional writers.

Though choosing to pursue writing has come with sacrifices and challenges, I am so thankful God led me to Author. As a writer, I feel like I’ve grown more in the last 6 months than I would’ve in 6 years on my own. This community has encouraged me to dedicate my writing–both fiction and non-fiction–to God, and invite Him into the process.

Perhaps you’re finding yourself in a situation where you aren’t sure what the next step should be. Consider bringing your options to God in prayer and seeking His direction.

Every decision comes with costs–but also blessings. The most blessed path, even if it requires patience and sacrifice, is the one in which God is leading you.

In fact, making sacrifices for something shows commitment to it. Sometimes the blessing that comes with sacrifice is recognizing how much you love something–or someone.

I used to be scared of making choices that would disrupt God’s plans for me. But none of us have the power to thwart God’s plans for us. We may take some detours along the way, but we will always end up exactly where He wants us to be. The smoothest way to get there (even if the road appears bumpy) is listening for His voice with each next step.

And often God’s path is lined with unexpected blessings: godly friendships, opportunities to trust Him deeper, patches of peace. Even laughter is a gift from God.

Celebrate the ways God has blessed the journey you’re on. Ask Him to meet you in the moments that feel difficult and discouraging. And trust that He is leading you to trust in Him more deeply with each passing season.

Then Job replied to the Lord:

“I know that you can do all things;
    no purpose of yours can be thwarted.”

Job 42:1-2 (NIV)

In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. 27 And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God.

28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. 

Romans 8:26-28 (NIV)

Journey to Inspiration

My revelations after coming out of a writer’s block.

I hit a writer’s block in December. By hit, I really do mean collided, smashed, and totaled my little writing vehicle. I like to picture it as a tiny, sky blue Bug with floral bumper stickers.

Early last summer, I created a goal to write for at least 15 minutes a day. I was working on a novel, one I was sure I’d finish, and this goal motivated me to continue working on it. For six months, I successfully kept this goal.

Until I realized I needed to scrap my novel and start a new project.

My cumulation of over eight months of work boiled down into one short story — I’d like to call it a novella, because it was quite a number of pages, but certainly not enough to be a novel — and then there was nowhere else to go with it. I should’ve been proud of that novella, and I was, deep down. But I was also deeply disappointed in myself. I felt like a failure for letting go of a project after spending so much time on it.

My feelings of inadequacy, my desire to crank out a perfect draft in one take, and my longing to be immersed in a fresh new story were the cement slabs of my writer’s block.

Have you ever been in that place? So drained of inspiration, and yet craving the feeling of being inspired again. I believe that inspiration comes from God, just as every good and perfect gift does. But inspiration is a bit like faith. God will help us develop a strong faith, but we have to be willing to do the work too.

To clarify, faith and salvation are two different things. Salvation is all about the work Jesus has already done for us. We don’t have to do anything except desire a relationship with Him and ask for this gift. While faith is a product of our relationship with Jesus, and Jesus is always there with us, we can’t grow in our faith if we aren’t willing to listen to Him, spend time with Him, or obey Him.

Faith requires sacrifice, courage, and patience. We often don’t make the right decision or think the kind thought the first time around. Jesus may call us to give of our time, energy, resources, and comfort in order to follow His will and love others. We may lose friends or opportunities because our priorities don’t align with the world’s. But isn’t it worth it to live a purposeful life, filled with the love of Jesus?

Inspiration requires sacrifice, courage, and patience too. We may endure many long, harrowing nights before we have a writing session where our fingers are flying and our hearts are full of anticipation. Our choices may not make sense to others, especially when we choose write instead of going out. (Though please, my fellow writers, make time to live your life outside of your writing too!) And often we don’t have instant gratification from our work.

But isn’t it worth it?

When I am inspired, I feel closest to God. I feel empowered and determined to use my writing to encourage others and to learn more about the world and myself. Spending time with complex characters makes me in awe of God for creating each of us so uniquely and knowing us so intimately. It is a profound experience that can lead to beautiful creations, if we are willing to embark on the journey to inspiration.

This month, I started a new writing goal, and I’m excited to say that I’ve stuck with it so far! My new writing project concerns this blog. While I love writing encouragement and faith-based nonfiction, my heart is found in fiction writing. I will continue writing these regular blog posts, but I’m also excited to announce that I will be adding a fiction section to this blog within the coming months! I hope that it brings you as much joy as it’s brought me.

No matter where you are on your journey, whether it is your spiritual journey, writing journey, or another journey, I hope you know that you are not alone. Jesus is walking right beside you, eager to help you grow into the person He created you to be.

Perhaps I will stay with you for a while, or even spend the winter, so that you can help me on my journey, wherever I go. For I do not want to see you now and make only a passing visit; I hope to spend some time with you, if the Lord permits.

1 Corinthians 16:6-7

Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

James 1:2-4

The Power of Lament

What if your pain can bring you closer to God?

Some call it feeling “low”, others call it “the blues”. But in reality, that sinking, twisting pang of sorrow, longing, or even misery can seem to great for words.

Yet what if words, though shallow they may feel, can actually bring deeper healing?

I used to feel guilty for complaining to God, but recently I’ve discovered the power of a prayer of lament. It’s not a long list of complaints, gossip, or ramblings. Rather, it’s a chance to grow closer to God by trusting Him with your deepest feelings, even when they are negative.

God cares about you–not just the sunny, cheerful parts or the action-packed, exciting moments. Not even the side that witnesses best. It is through dealing with the painful, dark times that we can open ourselves fully to the love God has for us and the love we are meant to share with others.

So, how do you write a lament? Here are a few simple steps (though really, with patience and reflection, will be so much more than simple):

  1. Address God (what names make you feel most connected to Him?)
  2. Admit your innermost feelings. Even if they don’t feel right or true, just write them out. Sometimes looking at words on a page can help them feel less overwhelming.
  3. Remember the ways that God has shown up for you in the past and thank Him.
  4. Find an aspect of your life that brings you hope. It doesn’t have to be big to be meaningful.

God loves you so much and wants desperately to hear from you. No matter what you are going through, you are not in this alone.<3

For no one is cast off
    by the Lord forever.

Though he brings grief, he will show compassion,
    so great is his unfailing love.
For he does not willingly bring affliction
    or grief to anyone.

Lamentations 3:31-33

The Story Behind “There is More Ahead of You”

Here is the story behind my new book, There is More Ahead of You! For a book description, check out my homepage!

I have exciting news–I wrote and self-published a book! This has been a dream of mine for so long and I am so delighted to finally share my work publicly. This blog has been the stepping stone for learning how to write for a wider audience and to see what kind of writing I am most passionate about. For details related to the book, check out my homepage or the bottom of this post!

To be honest, if you had asked me if I thought I’d be publishing a book this fall prior to September, I would’ve said “I wish, but no”. It would’ve seemed like an impossible idea, considering I’m still in my first quarter of college. But that just goes to show how God works!

This isn’t the type of book I planned to write either. It combines a newfound hobby (digital art) and my desire to encourage others in a short story designed to help readers feel seen and understood.

All the way until I started this blog two years ago, I dreamed of writing fictional young adult novels centered around relationships, adventure, and faith. However, while relaxing to calming music and doodling on my iPad, God sent me inspiration in the form of an orange blob.

Yep, that’s not a typo–an orange blob started it all.

My first drawing featured the orange blob person surrounded by smoke, symbolizing the overwhelming sensation and heaviness life often casts upon us. At first, I considered making this person more realistic, but I realized that anyone can put themselves in the place of this blob, rather than just a person who happens to resemble the appearance of this character. Plus, it didn’t require detailed art, but rather abstract ideas.

After that, I spent several hours drawing whatever came to me. I made a rough outline of what I hoped readers would take away from the story and soon enough, the entire book came together.

What took longer than making the book was figuring out how to publish it–or rather, mustering up the confidence to consider publishing it.

I went back and forth on the idea for a few weeks. Everything seemed so complicated and the process wasn’t cheap, though it was cheaper than trying to publish a novel and easier than searching for a publisher.

But once I got the assurance from several trusted loved ones and acted on this new calling, things fell into place. I found a way to make the book slightly cheaper (unfortunately books are costly to manufacture, but I wanted anyone to be able to access my book). One thing all authors need to buy is an ISBN code (an identification barcode), and I found a way to get one for free through the publishing website. These simple signs confirmed that God wants me to do this.

I’m still unsure what God wants to do through this book, but I trust that He will turn my simple words and pictures into something far greater than anything I can imagine.

While the messages of the story are meant to be uplifting and encouraging, I know I couldn’t have written them under happy, easy circumstances. For various reasons, the past several months have been draining and frustrating for me. Often, I even want to give up, though I know that I must keep going in order to fulfill God’s purpose for my life and see what He is doing through all of this.

Though I’m likely the most excited about my book coming out, I hope that this can be a sign for you to keep going too. I believe that God is trying to show both of us that even when things don’t make sense, He will create something beautiful out of our painful, confusing situations.

God wants to use your story. God wants to use you. He can see the incredible potential you have and He made you intentionally to use your gifts for wondrous things.

I know that you [God] can do all things, and that no purpose of yours can be thwarted.

Job 42:2

Behold, I am the Lord, the God of all flesh. Is anything too hard for me?

Jeremiah 32:27

What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?

Romans 8:31

If you would like to purchase a copy of my book, check out this link!

https://www.blurb.com/b/10890467-there-is-more-ahead-of-you

Your support and encouragement mean the world to me! Thank you for being here ❤