Tag: Relationships

The Arch of God’s Love

Life is more than a cycle.

So often, life can just feel like a cycle.

Brush, rinse, wash, repeat. Meet-cute, fall in love, break up, repeat. Feel lonely, make friends, get heartbroken, repeat.

Even life itself: Born, struggle, succeed, decline, die, onto the next.

But is that really life?

For the past few years, I’ve been caught up seeing life as a cycle. It’s more draining making friends after knowing how quickly you can lose them. It’s harder to take initiative after being rejected.

Perhaps you can relate. The worst is when you pray, God answers the prayer, and then the thing you feared happens anyway. False hope cuts deeper than no hope at all.

But maybe what we’re feeling isn’t false hope. Maybe we have our hope placed in the outcome more than in who gives us hope.

This week, I was reminded of the story of Elijah and the widow. He meets the widow and her son during a drought when they are preparing their last meal in anticipation of their greatest fear: death. But miraculously, God provides them with enough food to survive!

But then…her son dies anyway.

Arguably, the widow is distressed. Why would God save them just to have her son die shortly after? He’s all she has, or so she thinks. What good is life without him? And what kind of God would allow this?

When we have a pressing need, it’s easy to become obsessed with it. Perhaps it’s a person in our lives who seems like a miracle, just to be taken away from us. Or maybe it’s an opportunity that would bring so much joy, only to fall through. It could even be a physical need, such as a place to live, food on the table, or enough money to make it through the month.

All these things that feel like necessities. That are necessities when living in this world.

When the woman cries out to God, He hears her. Through Elijah, God is able to bring her son back to life. And through this heart-wrenching experience, she can finally proclaim, “Now I know that you (Elijah) are a man of God and that the word of the Lord from your mouth is the truth” (1 Kings 17:24).

Now. Now I can see. Now I know that You hear me.

It took not a cycle of God’s love coming and going. It took an arch of belief. Starting off helpless, going on a journey towards trusting God fully, and ending with the knowledge that God loves without fail.

Maybe the “son” in your story has already died. Maybe it feels like God was too late.

But I promise that God is using everything in your life to bring you back to His love. Through hardship and heartache, God is right there, protecting you from things you couldn’t even imagine.

God wants you to turn to Him when you feel yourself sinking in despair, loneliness, or confusion. He doesn’t want you to be alone. Through it all, you will never be alone. ❤

For none of us lives for ourselves alone, and none of us dies for ourselves alone. If we live, we live for the Lord; and if we die, we die for the Lord. So, whether we live or die, we belong to the Lord.

Romans 14:7-8

To The Person Doubting Love

One person’s lack of love doesn’t extinguish everyone else’s potential to care about you. ❤

Dear Heartbroken,

Hoping, praying, expecting for so long, yet met with disappointment. So sure that this was the perfect time, that you were finally ready. And now, everything has fallen apart.

You may look in the mirror and doubt your true beauty. You may walk along the streets, resenting those who seem to have what would fill the void in your heart.

Tired, achy, longing for more. Knowing that you were made for more.

And yet somehow…stuck here. Fragile little bits of yourself strewn around you with little hope of every being whole again.

But you are not fragile or broken or defeated. Yes, you feel small and vulnerable, but in our weakest moments, light can still pour in.

During times when you feel unsure of yourself, remember that you have someone beside you to bring you hope. To love you the way that many humans haven’t before.

Though you may be tired of hearing this, let this be the day when the words finally sink in.

Jesus loves you. More than anyone ever could. Even when you feel at your weakest, He will make you strong.

It won’t happen instantaneously. You may still feel tired after calling out to Him, yet perhaps you will also have a sense of peace. A renewal of energy, even if for a second.

And through it all, you will be reminded that you aren’t alone.

While Jesus is the only one who can love us unconditionally, even though people are flawed, they still have the potential to love beautifully. Don’t let one, or even several, heartbreaks cause you to doubt the validity of love.

Love comes in many forms. Just because one form didn’t work out doesn’t mean you should give up on all the rest.

Instead, exhibit the love you wish to receive. Not blindly trusting those put in your path, but rather listening intentionally, offering kindness and generosity when given the chance, and being gracious when mistakes are made.

If we all demonstrated the love we long for, our world would be a much lovelier place. So let this transformation start with you. ❤

Sincerely,

Hannah

These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the end result of your faith, the salvation of your souls.

1 Peter 1:7-9

Living in a Graceless World

Do you feel exhausted living in a world that assumes?

Connected even when apart, whether through mobile devices, social media, or even tracking apps, why are we (GenZers) considered the loneliest generation?

Whether or not you are part of this generation, our world continues to feel isolated even as COVID restrictions relax and people start getting out in the world again.

Perhaps it’s because “connection” no longer means meaningful conversations, getting to know one another on a deeper level, or the start of a friendship. Rather, connection has grown cold. A mere point of contact.

I am part of a social media community that began as a way for people with similar hobbies to encourage and help each other develop photography skills. However, now it has become a place where anyone who even likes or follows the “wrong” or “cancelled” person will be the next kicked out. While this is done out of hurt feelings, or perhaps even fear of being “exposed” themselves, it has destroyed a space that used to bring joy to many.

While internet relationships are often blamed, we are just as inclined to judge people quickly when face-to-face, including in communities of Christ-followers.

While participating in ministry, I have sadly witnessed many otherwise loving and God-honoring leaders turn on each other over issues that could’ve been resolved in a polite and respectful manner. One preference leads to a series of assumptions that are often untrue or speak nothing of a person’s character and capabilities.

Our society prides itself on how much better we are than previous eras in history. We are so much more informed and aware now.

But are we really better? Or are the same traps our ancestors fell into the ones we are encountering today?

The stereotypes we create for people aren’t the same as in the past (which is a step in the right direction), yet we still make assumptions about people, particularly because we often don’t take the time to fully get to know the people in our communities.

It is wonderful that we now have the opportunity to make friends from around the world, yet this gift needs to be handled with wisdom. How can we rationalize “exposing” someone on the Internet if we don’t even know their real name or anything about their history? How can we convince ourselves that we are loving when we remove someone from our lives over a difference of opinion?

The truth is, opinions (yes, even the ones that feel like so much more than that) will change. People, when given the opportunity and environment, will grow.

Put yourself in your childhood shoes. If your teacher yelled and screamed at you, then forced you out of the classroom if you didn’t get the answer they were hoping for, would you actually learn anything except that you didn’t want to be near the teacher? Probably not.

But if your teacher listened to your ideas, even if they were misguided, and respected you as a person while explaining another approach, you would likely remember the lesson and desire to come back the next day.

Jesus is the best teacher of all. He listens to us, even though all of us, with our minds combined, could never compare to His wisdom and knowledge. Yet He loves us, and as He helps us become the best people we can be, allows us to make mistakes and ask for forgiveness.

Grace is Jesus’ never-ending gift for us. If we can sprinkle a little of that grace within our lives, imagine the healing it would bring. ❤

For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by works, so that no one can boast.

Ephesians 2:8-9

In the same way, the gospel is bearing fruit and growing throughout the whole world—just as it has been doing among you since the day you heard it and truly understood God’s grace.

Colossians 1:6

Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.

Colossians 4:6

Purpose in the Passion

Do you ever feel like pursuing your passions is a waste?

We all have something we feel passionately about.

Perhaps it’s something that carries weight for many people, such as supporting human rights or taking care of God’s creation or spreading Christlike love. Or maybe it’s something that’s been a cause of embarrassment, like an obscure hobby or a career goal that feels out of reach. Maybe it’s staying faithful to be there for someone who has been difficult in the past or an outsider in your community.

Whatever this passion is, it has a purpose. God gives us our passions for a reason.

They may feel insignificant to others or even to ourselves when we begin to doubt. Why are we wasting time caring about this thing or person when so many other things are going on in the world?

But we aren’t in charge of the whole world, and that’s a big relief.

Rather, we are given specific passions so that we can actually make an impact.

If you have a passion that feels God-given, don’t let anyone tell you that your work is meaningless. Taking part in things that bring you joy and allow you to step into God’s calling for your life is one of the most incredible things you can do.

Today, ask yourself what are the top five things you feel passionately about. Try to make them as specific as possible, such as caring for the needs of a particular friend or participating in the rebuilding of relationships during a divisive time in your community.

Your passions matter. Repeat that with me. No matter how insignificant or far-fetched they feel, if they matter to you, then they matter to God.

You are uniquely gifted to be in the space you fill. Trust that God can use you to do amazing things, and watch your life bloom from there.

Therefore you do not lack any spiritual gift as you eagerly wait for our Lord Jesus Christ to be revealed. He will also keep you firm to the end, so that you will be blameless on the day of our Lord Jesus Christ.

1 Corinthians 1:7-8

The Key to Dealing with Annoying People

Advice for reorienting frustrating relationships.

We’ve all got that person. Maybe several.

The one who pushes our buttons, rubs us the wrong way, and makes us second guess whether or not Jesus really knew what He was talking about when He said we have to love everybody. Surely Jesus hasn’t met this person, right?

I have many “button-pushers” in my life, so I completely understand where you’re at. In fact, trying to be “nice” to these people is something that’s been really hard for me recently.

Many devotionals will tell you to just remember how much Jesus loves them, and you should too. But that’s not really practical, is it?

For me, the thing that helps me deal with irritating people the most is random acts of kindness.

Not “killing them with kindness” in a performative, superficial way that ends up in resentment. Rather, just one simple act as a reminder that they are human and so are you.

Perhaps one act will lead to another and you’ll find yourself a much more patient, generous, and compassionate person. Or maybe it will end at one, but even kind deed can change someone’s life.

We all make mistakes. We won’t get along with everyone. But these tiny things can add up to make big changes in the most difficult of relationships.

The truth is, we really don’t know what’s going on in another person’s life. Maybe this act of kindness will soften their rough edges or improve your relationship. Or maybe it won’t and things will feel the same.

But you won’t ever have to regret showing them God’s love. You will have peace knowing that you did the right thing and someday maybe they’ll see that.

And above all, pray for them. It might not seem like it will make a difference, but I promise you, putting all your difficulties into Jesus’ hands is the best way to find wisdom and grace.

Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds,  because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.

James 1:2-3

To the Person Saying Goodbye

To those who are facing emotional goodbyes.

Dear Hopeful,

Perhaps this season brings you relief. It’s been a long year, a tiring year. A year that’s asked so much of you, and may have felt like it offered little in return for all your sacrifices and heartache.

Or maybe you are hoping that this isn’t goodbye. These last few months may have offered you a time to rest and find inspiration again. You don’t want to lose what you have here, yet it feels like life is slipping through your fingers.

This may be goodbye to a season of life, a relationship, or something tangible that’s either held you back or given you courage. Regardless of whether or not you want to say goodbye, stepping away from something familiar is difficult.

Give yourself grace.

Grace for the unexpected tears.

Grace for the laughter when it doesn’t feel appropriate.

Grace for the stumbles and mistakes.

Grace for when you don’t even know how to feel anymore.

You are not weak for needing time to process. Working through your feelings is the only way to find peace and move forward.

Goodbyes are inevitable, but so are new beginnings. Allow yourself to be excited for the future, no matter what unknowns lie ahead.

No matter what, don’t give up hoping. Life will get better, even if “better” simply means finding peace and being grateful even through hardships.

You are loved. ❤

Sincerely,

Hannah

The Freedom of Being Wrong

What if being wrong can bring us closer to God?

People hate being wrong.

I’m sure that’s pretty obvious, but the issue is that our society doesn’t seem to see this as a problem. Yet it is because our pride separates us from loving each other and God.

While we’d like to believe that no one can be wrong, the world wouldn’t work if that were true. There is only one who is always right, and that would be Jesus.

It’s to our benefit that Jesus is always right, especially because we are often wrong. Thanks to Jesus knowing best, we can live in peace and comfort because we are forgiven and taken care of. We can be reminded that we are loved and valued, even when others don’t treat us that way, because only Jesus’ opinion of us matters.

But yet our sinful desires often tell us that it would be better if we were right. Yet we don’t know the future. We don’t know the impact our decisions will make. We don’t know whether or not something will actually help us. We would be helpless without God’s help.

When we pretend like we are right all the time, we are harming three important relationships:

  1. Our relationship with God
  2. Our relationship with others
  3. Our relationship with ourselves

We act like we are above God (hint: we aren’t) when we pretend that we know more than He does. Like we, mere specks, could possibly have a better plan than the Creator of the Universe.

When we think we are always right, we never take ownership for our mistakes. That causes others to feel hurt and confused by our actions. We will quickly lose important relationships that way, and surely people won’t feel the love of God from us.

And when we believe we are always right, we give ourselves a false sense of security, when the truth is, we know very little. So when we finally recognize that we’ve made a mistake, we feel like failures, utterly useless and worthless.

But when we recognize that we are wrong sometimes, then when we do make a mistake, we can be proactive in repenting and be reminded that we don’t have to feel ashamed because we are covered in God’s grace.

So what’s the best way to handle this problem? Not picking out other people’s faults, but focusing on how to change your own outlook. Not living in shame, but praising God for the ways He is working within your life to make you the best person you can possibly be.

Remember, accepting being wrong is actually a gift. It frees you from having the expectation of always needing to be right.

You are loved and cherished no matter what ❤

Do not love the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world, love for the Father is not in them. For everything in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—comes not from the Father but from the world. The world and its desires pass away, but whoever does the will of God lives forever.

1 John 2:15-17

Appreciating Each Other

A pressing reminder when we are tempted to take others for granted.

For many, a story is a story by the way everything gets wrapped up all nice and pretty, like a Christmas present. The characters are happy by the end, fully changed, incapable of any further harm. We are satisfied.

But in life, we don’t often get closure, do we? We say goodbye without even knowing it. We walk past someone for the last time without a second thought. We think we are friends until we’re not.

Recently, I’ve been reminded of the bitter truth that we never know how long we’re going to have with someone.

Why would God allow that?

Honestly, I don’t know. In the wake of a sudden loss, an unexpected diagnosis, and/or division among those once close, it can be hard to make sense of God’s greater plan within all of it.

My best guess is that we are more motivated to be kind and grateful to those in our lives when we remember that we aren’t in control of how long we’ll have them around.

In Mere Christianity, C.S. Lewis remarks that, by being made in the image of God, the next closest thing to be with God Himself is when we are among other humans. Now did that put a spin on the way I saw the people who annoy me!

We aren’t perfect and we shouldn’t beat ourselves up over being irritated at people or needing alone time. But we should always hold these things close to our hearts when we interact with people.

We really don’t know when the last time will be. We don’t know the full story. We just know that God has placed His creation in our lives for a time, and we can choose to be blessed by them.

Today, I challenge us both to look at the people in our lives with new appreciation. When was the last time you told your loved ones how much they mean to you? Have you seen the people in your life as a gift, rather than a burden?

Going further, to the people who you don’t agree with or rub you the wrong way, how can you still appreciate them? You might think you want them out of your life, and that time may come, but perhaps there is a reason why they are here now.

You are loved and treasured, no matter if others recognize it or not. If no one has taken the time to appreciate you today, I will. You are God’s special creation, designed for incredible things. It is not to late for you to heal and flourish. ❤

Therefore since we are God’s offspring, we should not think that the divine being is like gold or silver or stone—an image made by human design and skill.

Acts 17:29

When It Feels Like God Can’t Hear You

Encouragement for when your prayers feel useless.

Silence.

You prayed and you begged and you wept until your eyes were puffy and your throat was sore.

Or maybe it was all in your head. Pounding words, pleading for a break, for a second chance, for a sign. Praying until your head ached, overloaded and overwhelmed.

Perhaps it was a simple prayer. Off-handed, just to see if God’s up there, somewhere.

No answer.

Things didn’t work out, you didn’t get a sign, and your life sucks just as much as it did yesterday.

Maybe…God didn’t hear you.

Or maybe God just doesn’t care.

That’s what the enemy likes to tell us, anyway. That God is incapable of something like listen or respond. But God hears every single prayer.

Maybe that makes it worse. Maybe knowing that God hears every prayer and things still aren’t working out causes your heart to grow heavy. Why would a God who cares allow your life to be ruined?

I have a new question for you: What if your life isn’t ruined?

As humans, we love filling in gaps, guessing what happens next. We plan our lives out to the end, expecting–or at least hoping–for things to go our way. And with God on our side, what could go wrong?

So many times in my life, I’ve felt God leading me towards a new path to take, and I expected God’s blessing to come in the form of everything working out the way I anticipated.

And then things didn’t work out. Relationships fell apart, mistakes were made, and hearts were broken.

Where was God in all of that?

Right there. Right next to me, just like God’s right next to you.

It is through these moments that I’m reminded of a hard truth.

Sometimes, God leads us into situations that are difficult. Just because a situation is difficult, doesn’t mean that God didn’t direct us there.

But we can find peace knowing that God won’t take us through those seasons without a purpose. To help us grow, to spread His light, and ultimately to bring us closer to Him.

So what is the point of praying if God has His own way of working everything out?

Prayer is more than asking God for things or trying to make a situation turn out a certain way. Prayer is a way of showing God that we trust Him through everything, no matter the outcome.

Prayer is our way of connecting to God.

Just let that sink in a moment. We have the opportunity to talk to the Divine, and we often allow momentary disappointment take away from the surreality of the truth.

God wants to talk to us. Yes, God also listens, and He hears every prayer. But going into prayer time with the mindset that God has something to say to you will change everything.

The next time you feel like God isn’t listening to you, ask God to show you what He wants you to get out of the circumstance you’re in.

Maybe He wants to grant you His overwhelming peace and comfort. Maybe He’s showing you how strong you are when you trust Him. Or maybe you are going through this in order to get to an even greater result.

Never underestimate the power of God.

But I have raised you up for this very purpose, that I might show you my power and that my name might be proclaimed in all the earth.

Exodus 9:16

Don’t Be a Mean Enemy

Why should we listen to Jesus’ commandment to love our enemies?

It’s easy to be nice to people who are nice to us.

But every enemy was once a friend, or at least in a proximity close enough to you to have hurt on either side from the falling out.

I’m sure you’ve seen this most often when a couple breaks up and starts posting nasty things about each other online. Soon, you begin to wonder what they even saw in each other in the first place! Or when two close friends or family members break ties, then it’s as though you can’t speak of them again.

So what happens when it isn’t so easy to be nice anymore?

Our culture would tell us to get them back or, at the very least, snub them. They need to PAY for what they did!

But I’d like to offer a new piece of advice, or really a not-so-new piece of advice that Jesus first gave that goes against our human nature.

Let’s love our enemies and pray for those who hurt us (Matthew 5:43-44).

But why? Why should we listen to such a hard commandment?

Here are a few reasons that help me when I struggle (which is often) with being kind to difficult (and even hurtful) people in my life.

We don’t know what’s going on for real.

When we are angry at someone, it’s easy to assume the worst. But the truth is, a lot of times falling outs or unkind words aren’t really about us. They are about something else that is fogging up the other person’s vision that could be hurting them or making them lash out. This isn’t an excuse for mean behavior, but it does remind us to extend them grace.

We may have a part to play in the situation.

Now, this certainly isn’t to victim blame. There are many times when we are hurt by someone who is trying to execute power over us and it isn’t our fault when we are wounded by them.

This advice is for when you don’t want to take responsibility for a difficult relationship even though you may not have been the easiest person either. We enjoy blaming others when we know deep down that there’s something in us that needs fixing too.

But the best path to healing is forgiveness. Having enough grace and humility to admit our mistakes and not let them define us, and also extending that mercy to others.

We have been forgiven for far more than we could ever forgive someone else.

It’s important to remember who is telling us to love our enemies: Jesus. Every time we sin, we hurt Jesus, acting like an enemy to Him.

But Jesus loves us anyway and paid the ultimate price to be in relationship with us. He knows what it’s like to forgive something so painful, a true betrayal, and still love anyway.

Whenever we get the chance to forgive someone, it’s an opportunity to grow closer to Jesus and feel grateful for His sacrifice.

We look rather ridiculous holding a grudge.

Sorry to be direct, but it’s true, isn’t it? We all roll our eyes when someone goes on and on about their issues with someone, and yet we are just as inclined to act the same way. I know I have, and likely will again in the future.

But there’s always time for a fresh start. Even just the effort of being more considerate with your words and actions towards someone you don’t like will make it harder to be unkind to them in the future. Allow yourself to process the pain and anger without acting in impulse.

Then you’ll never have a regret, and you just might find yourself with a friend again 🙂

But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.

Luke 6:27-28