Tag: Rejection

Hope Amidst Rejection

Jesus is right there, even in your most broken moments.

Rejection shows up in a variety of forms.

At times, it may be losing or not getting a job. Other times, it may be a friend or romantic interest/partner who no longer wants a relationship with you. Rejection can stem back to childhood, when a family member didn’t accept you or love you as they should’ve.

We can even show ourselves rejection through harmful self-talk or criticizing ourselves when we make mistakes.

But you don’t need me to tell you what rejection is. You’ve likely felt it’s sting before, whether through harsh words or unkind actions, or even silence and ignorance themselves.

Nobody is free from being rejected at one time or another, including Jesus. If that’s hard to wrap your head around, think about all the people in your life who haven’t accepted His love, even though He offers it openhandedly. Remember the people in the Bible who spoke falsely about Jesus, who even participated in His brutal murder. Jesus knows what it’s like to feel alone and unwanted.

Yet Jesus is the epitome of courage and faithfulness. When He is alone in the Garden of Gethsemane right before His crucifixion, He calls out to God, blood tears pooling on His forehead. Even in His loneliest moment, He knows who is always with Him.

Jesus doesn’t pretend that the pain from rejection isn’t real or that we shouldn’t grieve our broken hearts. In fact, He’s with us in those dark, intimate moments when we feel lost without belonging.

When Jesus sends out 72 disciples to venture into outside towns and share the good news, He warns them that they may face rejection and hostility. He also provides them words of comfort: “Whoever listens to you listens to me; whoever rejects you rejects me; but whoever rejects me rejects him who sent me” (Luke 10:16 NIV).

The next time you are heartbroken over feeling rejected, remember that Jesus experiences those emotions alongside you, especially when you are rejected for your faith and/or for who God created you to be. You don’t have to listen to the voices who tell you that you’re not good or worthy enough. Remember what Gods calls you — His precious, beloved child. You will always, always belong to Him the moment you accept His love into your heart.

See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know him. 2 Dear friends, now we are children of God, and what we will be has not yet been made known. But we know that when Christ appears, we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is.

1 John 3:1-2

To the Person Longing to Let Go of Resentment

Are you struggling with bitterness towards a person you used to love?

Dear Seeker of Peace,

Seeing their picture, watching from afar–or perhaps even up-close–and all you can feel is the deep seeded urge to find fault in them. Everything inside you churns with feelings that eat you from the inside–and now it shows.

You long for peace with yourself. They are the ones who hurt you, right? Yet somehow, your resentment feels much worse than what they did. It’s turning you into someone you don’t recognize anymore.

But what you feel isn’t hate–it’s lost love. Perhaps one-side, rejected love. Perhaps lonely, empty, disappointed love. Perhaps love that started off so strong, but fizzled or exploded and lays burnt, like your frayed expectations.

You never wanted to feel this way. Your love started off so beautiful, perhaps even reflective of the love Jesus extends for us to share. But now, it is broken. The only thing you feel is pain.

It’s pain and not hate because deep down inside, you still care very much. Somehow, seeing their name pop up in your notifications still brings a smile to your face. But even your smile feels broken. Used. Betrayed.

It’s okay to hurt.

It’s okay to cry.

It’s even okay to be upset.

But don’t let their mistake or insensitivity destroy who you are and who you are meant to be. It isn’t your fault that they hurt you, but it’s your choice to let it break you.

You are stronger than this. Strength doesn’t come in ignoring feelings; it comes from not letting those feelings control you.

We weren’t made to be bitter. We weren’t made to be vengeful. And we certainly weren’t made to hate–or whatever this is.

But we also weren’t made for seeking love from the wrong people. There is only one person who can satisfy this deep desire and make you whole again: Jesus.

His love will follow you all the days of your life and never leave you nor forsake you.

You will always be precious in His eyes.

Love,

Hannah

My flesh and my heart may fail,

But God is the strength of my heart

and my portion forever.

Psalm 73:26

The Thing We Fear Most: Rejection

Have people in the past made you feel worthless? Today I’ll share how to overcome rejection and where to find hope again.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately. I’m sure if I took a poll, most people would say they’d want to be reached out to or have people be real with them. Sometimes a simple call or even a “hello” can make a world of difference in someone’s life. Sometimes one vulnerable conversation can lead to a lasting relationship or a place of healing. Yet we often allow our fears to talk us out of being the one to reach out or start an honest conversation. And what do we fear, you might ask? Rejection.

The first thing that comes to mind when I see the word “rejection” is its prevalence in romantic relationships, when one person likes another, and the feelings aren’t reciprocated. While this is a big area where people lose confidence, it is not the only place where rejection seeps into our lives.

A person close to me was rejected by her parents and a step parent and spent much of her growing up years undervalued and treated as “second-rate” to her step-siblings. Through this trauma of not having a real, permanent home, nor trustworthy guardians, decades later, she is still experiencing the effects.

I recently was able to spend time with her and I saw how even the ones she considers close to her were really kept at a distance. It breaks my heart to see how the rejection she experienced as a child has caused her to avoid being rejected by family, friends, and partners in her adult years by not letting others in.

The worst part is, this fear continues to keep her from seeing her true worth. Her family and friends want to know her, the real her, not just the person hiding behind walls of generosity and strength. Yet past rejection has led her to believe that no one truly cares about her or wants to be around her when she’s herself.

It makes sense that we fear rejection. After all, what’s the best feeling in the world? Being loved and wanted. So of course the worst feeling in the world is being rejected.

And when we’re rejected, it’s not really as simple as “oh I just want to stay friends” or “I don’t need a kid around right now”; it’s really an attack on our identity. It’s saying we truly are as worthless as we feel sometimes. It’s our worst fear coming true: that being ourselves isn’t enough and there’s nothing we can do about it.

Though the obvious root of rejection comes from early experiences with it, such as in my previous examples, or when friends or others we admire dump us, there is an even deeper meaning behind our fear of rejection.

When we allow others to define us, we forget the only One whose opinion matters: God’s.

When we get bogged down by criticism or feeling ignored, we have to remember that our worth is found in God. When we look to people to decide how valuable we are, which we’ve all done I’m sure, then we are not believing that God’s word is true.

God says we are chosen, loved, worth so much, even death on a cross. And when we spend time with God, the One who loves us the most, and with people who show us God’s love, we will start feeling worthy again.

Moving on and letting go of people is hard. I recently read a story to some kids about how a hermit crab had to let go of his old friends and old shell once he outgrew them. It was really hard for him because he cared about them, yet he knew that was the only way he could survive.

Sometimes, we have to let go of people and things who don’t allow us to grow into the people God made us to be. If they don’t affirm God’s feelings toward us, then it might be time to move on. I know it’s so difficult, but I promise that once you embrace who God made you to be, you will start feeling worth loving again.

 For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love he predestined us for adoption to sonship through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will— to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves. 

Ephesians 1:4-6

Song Recommendation: Already Enough, by Fearless Soul: https://youtu.be/kFQ7qiqm6WA