healing – The Will to Wake Up

Who is Guarding Your Heart?

Let’s release our hearts to God, the only one who can heal us.

Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.

~ Proverbs 4:23 (NIV)

Last year, my heart felt tender. After experiencing betrayal and rejection from a once-close family member, it was as if my heart was on a chopping block and every person in my life was given a knife to use at their own discretion.

Some chose to lay down their knives and offer bandages instead. But others dug deeper into my open wounds with their sharp blades.

Over time, my heart grew tough in an effort to protect itself. If I’m made of metal, a knife can’t slice through and damage me any further.

It worked, in a sense. Insensitive words and painful situations didn’t have the same impact on me. I felt emboldened to go out into the world and decide who was worthy of my trust.

But guarding my heart on my own strength came at a great loss–to myself and to those around me.

After training my heart not to feel, I struggled to empathize with my friends when they shared their heartbreaks with me. I began to scrutinize every relationship, trying to judge whether or not these people mirrored any traits from my past offenders. I alone had to determine whether or not I was safe.

Living in a world surrounded by concrete walls isn’t really living at all.

It felt as if I had lost the best parts of myself, in addition to doubting my community. God calls us to love others, but how could I love–an extremely vulnerable action–when I couldn’t trust?

So then…was I failing God?

And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 4:7

Thankfully, God didn’t leave me in this empty, searching place. He drew me closer to Him through His Word and teaching, as well as the faithfulness of friends who didn’t give up on me.

Most importantly, He reminded me that I’m not in charge of guarding my own heart.

Yes, we must exercise discernment in our lives. But we must surrender our hearts to God so that He can protect us. He’s the only one who can provide us security and safety while allowing our hearts to remain moldable and open to love.

Surrender requires sacrificing our own safety net and battle plan. But we’re releasing ourselves to the only One in control, who has the greatest plan.

When we try to guard our own hearts, we end up hardening them instead. A hardened heart isn’t open to love or transformation, but God will still accept your hardened heart and turn it back to flesh.

God doesn’t promise a life free from suffering and pain, even when we surrender our hearts to Him. But He does promise peace through Jesus, who has already overcome the world.

When we rely on His grace and peace for our security, rooting ourselves in being children of God rather than allowing others to determine our worth, we will find our hearts’ desire.

And that, my friend, is the unconditional and unchanging love of Jesus.

“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”

John 16:33

If you are weary and broken, go to Him.

If you are empty and depleted, go to Him.

If you are rejoicing and hope-filled, go to Him.

If you don’t know who you are or what comes next, go to Him.

Jesus is waiting with open arms to receive you. He is worthy of our trust. ❤

I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh.

Ezekiel 36:26

Fixing What is Broken is Hard — and It’s Worth It

We all have once choice: healing or remaining in our brokenness. Which will you choose today?

When we notice our cracks, our emptiness, and our voids, we have one choice. Will we choose healing or will we choose to remain in our brokenness?

Healing seems like the obvious answer. The word itself brings to mind waves lapping against smooth sand and the rushing sound of water washing us clean. Healing sounds peaceful, and there is a glorious aspect of peace in healing.

But healing is also hard work. It requires us to be honest with ourselves about our brokenness. We often have apologies and reparations to make. And healing isn’t a linear process.

The latter has been the hardest for me to grasp recently. My healing journey began five years ago when I made the decision to surrender my brokenness to Jesus and beg for His help. He listened to me, as He always does, and has helped me grow and let go and discover more of Him since.

There have been fleeting moments of such strong peace that tempt me to wonder if my healing journey is over. Perhaps I am finally the person I have wanted to become.

And then an incident occurs or an unhealthy emotion rises up, and I find myself once again at the mercy of Jesus on account of my deep brokenness.

The hardest part about returning to that place is the sense of failure that accompanies this vulnerable posture. Sitting there in the darkness, I fight doubts over whether or not I’ll ever heal.

And the truth is, we aren’t able to experience complete healing on this side of Heaven because we live in a broken world. We may fully repair one crack just to have a dent appear.

Does that mean healing isn’t worth it?

Absolutely not. Healing is a vital part of sanctification, which is the process we undergo on earth where God helps us become more holy as we grow closer to Him.

While healing isn’t easy, the process itself allows us to trust God on a deeper level and let go of our pride and self-sufficiency. This can deepen our relationships with others because we recognize our need for them, too.

When we arrive at the feet of Jesus in humble submission, He doesn’t shame us. He welcomes us with loving arms. It is a courageous act — not an act of failure — to return to Jesus and ask for His healing. We are often rewarded with His comfort and peace, even if our external (or internal) circumstances are still quite messy.

Another aspect of healing that makes it difficult is the hope it requires. We must believe that we are worth the work it takes to heal. You may not feel worth it right now, and that’s okay.

There is someone who believes you are worth it: Jesus. He was willing to die and rise again to allow you the opportunity not only to experience healing on earth, but to heal fully in Heaven.

I also believe you are worth it. There are others in your life, even if you don’t realize it now, who love you and want you to embrace your God-given identity as a beloved child of the Most High King. None of the lies you believe about yourself, or that have been inflicted upon you by others, are strong enough to remove your identity in Christ.

Call out to God and trust that He hears you. Ask Him who in your life can support you during this time. Then reach out to them and keep your heart open to healing.

You will always be loved. You do not have to embark on this healing journey alone.

When the apostles returned, they reported to Jesus what they had done. Then he took them with him and they withdrew by themselves to a town called Bethsaida,but the crowds learned about it and followed him. He welcomed them and spoke to them about the kingdom of God, and healed those who needed healing.
Luke 9:10-11

And a little bonus Marvel advice 😉 I hope this little scene encourages you as it did me last night:

Loki Season 2 Clip

Living in a Graceless World

Do you feel exhausted living in a world that assumes?

Connected even when apart, whether through mobile devices, social media, or even tracking apps, why are we (GenZers) considered the loneliest generation?

Whether or not you are part of this generation, our world continues to feel isolated even as COVID restrictions relax and people start getting out in the world again.

Perhaps it’s because “connection” no longer means meaningful conversations, getting to know one another on a deeper level, or the start of a friendship. Rather, connection has grown cold. A mere point of contact.

I am part of a social media community that began as a way for people with similar hobbies to encourage and help each other develop photography skills. However, now it has become a place where anyone who even likes or follows the “wrong” or “cancelled” person will be the next kicked out. While this is done out of hurt feelings, or perhaps even fear of being “exposed” themselves, it has destroyed a space that used to bring joy to many.

While internet relationships are often blamed, we are just as inclined to judge people quickly when face-to-face, including in communities of Christ-followers.

While participating in ministry, I have sadly witnessed many otherwise loving and God-honoring leaders turn on each other over issues that could’ve been resolved in a polite and respectful manner. One preference leads to a series of assumptions that are often untrue or speak nothing of a person’s character and capabilities.

Our society prides itself on how much better we are than previous eras in history. We are so much more informed and aware now.

But are we really better? Or are the same traps our ancestors fell into the ones we are encountering today?

The stereotypes we create for people aren’t the same as in the past (which is a step in the right direction), yet we still make assumptions about people, particularly because we often don’t take the time to fully get to know the people in our communities.

It is wonderful that we now have the opportunity to make friends from around the world, yet this gift needs to be handled with wisdom. How can we rationalize “exposing” someone on the Internet if we don’t even know their real name or anything about their history? How can we convince ourselves that we are loving when we remove someone from our lives over a difference of opinion?

The truth is, opinions (yes, even the ones that feel like so much more than that) will change. People, when given the opportunity and environment, will grow.

Put yourself in your childhood shoes. If your teacher yelled and screamed at you, then forced you out of the classroom if you didn’t get the answer they were hoping for, would you actually learn anything except that you didn’t want to be near the teacher? Probably not.

But if your teacher listened to your ideas, even if they were misguided, and respected you as a person while explaining another approach, you would likely remember the lesson and desire to come back the next day.

Jesus is the best teacher of all. He listens to us, even though all of us, with our minds combined, could never compare to His wisdom and knowledge. Yet He loves us, and as He helps us become the best people we can be, allows us to make mistakes and ask for forgiveness.

Grace is Jesus’ never-ending gift for us. If we can sprinkle a little of that grace within our lives, imagine the healing it would bring. ❤

For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by works, so that no one can boast.
Ephesians 2:8-9

In the same way, the gospel is bearing fruit and growing throughout the whole world—just as it has been doing among you since the day you heard it and truly understood God’s grace.
Colossians 1:6

Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.
Colossians 4:6

A Simple Prayer

Do you struggle with finding time for rest?

When I was young, I struggled with falling asleep. By struggled, I mean it was a serious battle every night to shut my fearful thoughts off long enough to close my eyes and let the heavy breathing set in.

As I’ve gotten older, this has improved, though I still struggle with falling asleep after a particularly stimulating day.

Perhaps you can relate to this particular problem, or on a broader scale, you have had trouble finding time to truly pause and rest. In our busy world, we are bombarded with demands and a million things to hold our attention.

But God promises us rest.

When I was young, I would ask my mom for help with falling asleep. She would launch into a lengthy prayer, listing off every possible person we might know who could use prayer. Sometimes, that would be enough to distract my thoughts to the point of falling asleep.

But now, I’ve gotten into the habit of refocusing my thoughts, rather than finding distraction, and centering them on God. A simple prayer, asking for rest, is all it takes to get that rest.

It may not come in the form you imagined. I have a friend who got sick and had to cancel her plans, which was very frustrating for her, but then it turned out she needed that week to rest up for the stressful month ahead.

Rest can come in many forms, such as:

God giving you the courage to set a boundary with someone
Cancelled plans
Having a barrier come up that opens up a chance to take a break
A few moments of quiet every night
Finding a listening ear in a friend you didn’t expect
Going out into nature to feel God’s presence
And many, many more! I would never want to limit God’s creativity.

Today, if you are feeling burned out, simply ask God for rest. Take this as a sign to take care of yourself, which is best done in nourishing your soul through rest and time with God. You are not weak for needing a break. ❤

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.
Matthew 11:28-29

An Endless Journey Towards Healing

In honor of Mental Health Awareness Month, I will be sharing my personal story to encourage you on your journey ❤

It was like a flip of the switch. Suddenly, the easygoing, joyful young girl I used to recognize was gone. In her place came an overbearing, extremely sensitive, critical little monster.

And that monster was me.

Though a series of difficult events were unfolding in my life, I can’t pinpoint any of them as the root cause of this change. It just…happened.

For a long time, I saw myself as this monster. This person who couldn’t be pleased, who drowned in her own misery when alone. This person who thought nobody wanted to be her friend, when really there were people around who just didn’t notice. And there were some who did notice, but she couldn’t seem to see them at the time.

I look at the past like another lifetime. Another person acting out my life.

And it’s true that much has changed, both in the way I see the world now, and the world itself. But we can’t completely separate ourselves from previous parts of our journey. Pretending like those things don’t bother us anymore is just a disservice to everybody.

Last summer, many of the challenges I faced at the start of my mental health journey resurfaced. But instead of working through them, I pushed them down.

“I’m not the weak, pathetic person I used to be,” I told myself. “I’m over all that.”

But acting like that person was weak and pathetic only caused me further harm. It made me think that I had to be those negative attributes if I was struggling mentally.

I wasn’t weak; I was worn-out and tired. I wasn’t pathetic; I was hungry for the satisfaction and healing that only God can bring.

That was me then, at age 15. That was me last summer. And that is still me today.

When you don’t deal with something, it comes back to face you sooner or later. Sure enough, after being in an unhealthy environment in the fall, I had to remove myself from that community in order to find the deeper healing I needed.

But I can’t say that’s the end of my story.

Sometimes it feels endless, searching for healing. As one thing is resolved, another comes up. But what if we look at each day as a new chance for more than just stress and anxiety?

Every day is a new chance for healing. For grace. For peace.

That also means that every day can be a challenge of trying to accept those gifts from God. It means not feeling worthy of them. It means fighting with my thoughts while trying to focus on the things that actually matter to me.

And it means making healing matter to me.

Mental health can’t be something we push off to tomorrow. You know this. Your mind won’t let you forget it.

Let today be the day that you start to take care of yourself, no matter what others think.

Not everyone will understand. That’s something I had to learn as I’ve begun to take steps towards taking care of myself this year.

But that’s okay. Not everyone needs to understand.

God understands. He designed you, after all, and He will use your story for great things.

It may be hard to see now, but you are growing. You are beautiful, with all your broken pieces. You don’t need to fix yourself. You just need to let the ultimate Healer restore you. ❤

May is Mental Health Awareness Month, and I encourage you to share your story with others. It doesn’t have to be on a big platform or even in public. You can share it with a friend or another loved one. Someone who wants the best for you.

Our stories matter. Sure, they don’t reflect every person’s story. No single story can, and we don’t need to burden ourselves with that great of a task.

Just sharing your story is enough to inspire and empower people. To help them know that they are not alone.

You are not alone. ❤

Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength. The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.
Mark 12:30-31

How Can a Good God Allow Pain?

Can pain actually bring deeper healing?

Out of curiosity and genuine concern, a friend of mine took a poll asking her followers why they choose to not believe in God, and the main result came down to this simple question: “How can I believe in God when there is so much pain and evil in the world?”

This is one of the trickiest theological questions of all time, likely due to the fact that while we can discuss pain at the intellectual level, it’s a completely different story when we’re the ones in pain or watching others suffer.

However, I hope to shed light on this subject in case you are on the fence about God these days. Many of my points are inspired by the book, The Problem of Pain, by C.S. Lewis, which I would highly recommend 🙂

The first step in Christianity is declaring that God is good and sovereign over our lives. But when a relationships falls apart, a loved one passes away, or even when a day full of humiliating mishaps occurs, we are left wondering if God even cares.

But C.S. Lewis argues (which I very much agree with) that the reason we have pain is because God cares. God cares enough about finishing what He’s started (us, His precious creations) to allow pain and suffering because He wants what’s best for us.

Think about it this way: When a potter is forming a masterpiece, will he leave it in a motionless, stable block on the table? No, of course not. Then the clay would just be a meaningless clump of wet dirt. The potter will pound out the air pockets, cut it into the right shape, and bake it to perfection.

Assuming clay has feelings, I’m sure the clay doesn’t enjoy the molding experience. But in the end, the clay has a purpose, a beautiful purpose, after going through the transformative process.

We are like the clay and God is like the potter. God doesn’t want us to stay useless. Our pain, our struggles, and ultimately overcoming those hardships creates a stronger, more faithful spirit within us. God doesn’t inflict pain on us, but He allows it in order to help us reach our full potential.

This, in fact, is what makes God loving. Loving someone isn’t condoning all their behavior. It’s about encouraging them to be who they are meant to be, even if that means going through difficulties or changing. It means being present through it all, just as God is for us.

God has done everything within His power (which is infinite) to ensure a wonderful future for us, an eternity with Him. But we must overcome the obstacles on Earth and carry on His legacy first.

The best gift we can have isn’t even Heaven–it’s being in a relationship with God, the most loving, perfect, and faithful being in the universe. Our pain often draws us closer to God, which is what it’s intended to do. By allowing us to experience difficulties, we are given the best gift of all–God’s comforting presence and understanding of our situation.

Now, like I said earlier, this can all be debated on the academic level. But when it’s personal, things feel a whole lot different.

Though pain has a purpose, it doesn’t make it easier to experience. If you are struggling today, you are not alone. You are loved and valued just by being here. You don’t have to explain your feelings or force yourself to feel “happy” about them. Rather, by being honest about how you feel, you can find deeper healing.

These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the end result of your faith, the salvation of your souls.
1 Peter 1:7-9

Unraveling the Cycle of Overthinking

Do you find yourself ruminating on embarrassing or hurtful memories rather than feeling good about yourself?

It’s the end of a long, brutal day. You settle down for a relaxing evening when suddenly–WOAH–something on your phone catches your eye. Maybe it’s a post or a text that reminds you of someone from your past. Or perhaps your phone is put away and an embarrassing memory pops into your brain instead.

Now your evening is essentially ruined because you’ve spent the past hour or so ruminating over a single interaction or response or photo. Maybe they like you, or maybe they never want to see you again. Maybe they think you’re attractive, or maybe they took one look at you and decided you’re not their type. Perhaps they left hidden messages in their text, or perhaps they were on the go and sent whatever Siri suggested for them.

You’ll never really know, and that’s the key issue. You just HAVE to know!!

Or do you really?

Have you ever found yourself stuck in the cycle of overthinking?

I appreciate Merriam Webster’s definition of overthinking, which is classified as, “putting too much time into thinking about or analyzing (something) in a way that is more harmful than helpful”.

The truth is, everything does have meaning, even if the meaning isn’t what we are imagining. However, we can’t let these embarrassing moments or interactions control our lives. Getting stuck down the rabbit hole of overthinking leads to feeling bad about yourself, resentful towards others, and fear for the future.

But how can we stop it? As an overthinker myself, I am also on the journey of reversing this cycle. Here are a few tips, and I’d love to hear any pieces of advice you have on this topic!

Tips to Avoid Overthinking

Figure out what triggers your overthinking. Is it a particular app? If so, limit your time on it or unfollow the person who makes you feel bad about yourself. If a specific person leads you to overthink, reevaluate the relationship to see if your interactions with this person are leading to growth and joy or doubting and stress.
Listen to positive and/or calming music. Sometimes songs, especially about heartbreak or disappointment, can lead to overthinking. Or if a song is tied to a memory that you continue to relive, you may want to avoid listening to it and focus your mind on things that will bring you hope.
Acknowledge that you could be right, but that doesn’t mean the end of the world. See if there are any realistic, practical steps you can take to get out of the situation or change your circumstances. If not, seek help and wise advice rather than trapping yourself in the cycle of overthinking.
Ultimately, remind yourself of what God says about you. God’s thoughts are the only ones that should really matter to us. He’s the only one who knows us fully and has our best in mind. He loves you, cares about you, and plans to use you for amazing things!

Everything does have meaning, but rarely does anything mean enough to take over our lives. Don’t let these intrusive thoughts get the best of you, but don’t beat yourself up when a discouraging thought pops into your head. Instead, take hold of it and release it. You are stronger than you think and more loved than you will ever know ❤

For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
    neither are your ways my ways,”
declares the Lord.
“As the heavens are higher than the earth,
    so are my ways higher than your ways
    and my thoughts than your thoughts.
Isaiah 55:8-9

Joy Can Be Found in Every Season

No matter what season you’re in, joy can still be found.

Does each new season of life come abruptly for you? In certain seasons, this change may be warmly welcomed. But in others, this shift feels like the rug has been torn out from under your feet.

Each season is unique and special, both in its pain and healing. But what if I told you that joy can be found in every season, even the most difficult?

Every individual’s life is different, but I often think of life as having five general seasons (not always cycling in the same order).

A season of preparation (also thought of as waiting, though I’ll explain the difference in word choice momentarily)
A season of loss
A season of trials
A season of rest and healing
A season of new opportunities

Now, once again, I’d like to clarify that our lives are too complex to be minimize and shoved into a set of five boxes. However, for the sake of simplicity, we will stick to these five main categories for today. I also realize that my life doesn’t mirror everyone’s lives, but I will use personal illustrations because these seasons have been so clearly reflected throughout my past year.

I use the word preparation rather than waiting because I believe we are waiting in every season. In a season of preparation, we are eagerly anticipating what’s to come. In a season of loss, we are waiting for the pain to ease. In times of testing and trials, we are waiting for our hard work and persistence to pay off. When we are recovering from fast-moving seasons, we are waiting to feel ourselves again. And when we are being restored, we are waiting to see what comes next.

Yet, through everything, we can still have hope and joy.

The SEason of Preparation

I distinctly remember this season starting. I had just graduated and the future felt so bright and hopeful. Yet, I was overcome by a sense of longing, a desire to move forward faster. Little did I know all that lie ahead.

Now, I firmly believe that preparing is an active word. When we feel stagnant in our current states, we must take the time God is giving us to be with Him, encourage others, and spend time in the Bible. We must be ready for what’s to come, yet ultimately trusting God with whatever the future holds.

How can we have joy when life feels boring?

We can reflect on the past and all that God has done through our different stages of life. We can develop our dreams and see how they align with God’s will for us. We can get excited about the future while being intentional about noticing what’s beautiful in the present.

More than any other season, intentionality is key as we prepare for what God has in store for us. Our time won’t feel wasted when we know our efforts are being put to good use.

For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.
Ephesians 2:10

The season of loss

This is arguably the most difficult season to find joy. When a loved one or a dream is stripped away from us, we are left feeling wounded, abandoned, and empty.

During this season, we are tempted to escape from the deep healing God is trying to stir within us. Last summer, I experienced loss and a sense of impending doom for the future. I wanted to run away from my problems, and I tried to do that, only to be faced with the truth.

God only wants the best for us. When we are experiencing pain, He is using that to draw us closer to Him. That doesn’t mean we should belittle our pain or brush off the efforts of others to relieve it.

Rather, we should allow ourselves to feel the depth of our pain and heartache. We may not always be in safe places to do this, but when we are given the opportunity, we must be honest with our feelings.

I have often found that my most intimate moments with God come out of seasons of disappointment, loneliness, and grief.

Allow yourself to be immersed in God’s comfort and love. Let these truths sink in:

You are loved.

You are important.

This person, this dream, this opportunity matters.

Your feelings matter.

You are going to get through this, one day at a time.

You can still find joy in this season by realizing you have the unique opportunity to feel God’s very presence in your life. You are able to relate to Jesus’ pain in a way you never have before. And ultimately, this season will lead to deeper healing.

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. For just as we share abundantly in the sufferings of Christ, so also our comfort abounds through Christ. If we are distressed, it is for your comfort and salvation; if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which produces in you patient endurance of the same sufferings we suffer. And our hope for you is firm, because we know that just as you share in our sufferings, so also you share in our comfort.
2 Corinthians 1:3-7

The season of Trials

This season may feel as difficult as the season of loss, yet for different reasons. Instead of feeling immense sadness or grief, you are faced with feelings of frustration and discouragement. You may even wonder whether or not you have a purpose.

You may be tempted to give up when the end feels so far away, yet our greatest strength comes from our most trying circumstances.

We experience the most growth during our tests of faith and perseverance. This growth should not be taken lightly. It is a true gift to be able to develop the skills and characteristics God has placed within us.

We can find joy in the fact that we are becoming more and more like Jesus the longer we follow Him and allow His love to infiltrate every aspect of our lives.

Yes, you are being challenged, and yes, you deserve time to rest. You may feel stretched to the limits, perhaps both emotionally and physically. But you can trust that this time is not being wasted.

Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
James 1:2-4

The season of rest and healing

Though some would rather choose to “skip” this season, we all must take the time to rest and heal from the strain life puts on us.

You are not weak for needing rest. You are not weak for needing time to heal. You are certainly not weak for asking for help during this season, whether it be from a trusted mentor, a close friend, or a professional skilled in helping others work through trauma.

Now, this season may not come after the “most traumatic incident of your life”. We need to periodically take the time to recover so that we are able to show up as our best selves during the seasons that ask a lot of us. Even the most skilled warriors and leaders in the Bible took time to rest. God commanded it, that’s why He built it into our weekly schedule.

But our society makes us feel insufficient when we aren’t able to carry the weight of the world alone any longer. How can we respond to that with joy?

By accepting the fact that yes, we are all insufficient. We need Jesus to carry our burdens with us and give us the deep healing we desire. And once you accept the restoration Jesus offers, you will begin to feel fully yourself, deeply known and loved by God.

Therefore, since the promise of entering his rest still stands, let us be careful that none of you be found to have fallen short of it. For we also have had the good news proclaimed to us, just as they did; but the message they heard was of no value to them, because they did not share the faith of those who obeyed. Now we who have believed enter that rest, just as God has said.
Hebrews 4:1-3

THe Season of New opportunities

I have recently come out of a season of healing. Though I put every last bit of myself into my work, relationships, and education, I plummeted into the season of healing as a shell of myself. I am so thankful to have had several weeks to rest and do things that bring me joy. This has prepared me for the season I believe to be entering, a season of new opportunities.

Over the past few days, I have been overwhelmed by new opportunities and fresh starts. Never have I actually entered a new year with this many changes.

While this is exciting, it is also slightly frightening. After so much has happened, it is hard to believe that good can really come out of life.

During this season, we face immense pressure to be grateful and happy. But we can’t force those feelings. Gratitude is important, but must come wholeheartedly. Happiness doesn’t last, not the way joy does.

Perhaps you are also in this season, or have experienced the desire to be joyful, yet you aren’t sure how to make these feelings appear.

The truth is, joy comes slowly but surely. It isn’t necessarily the initial spark of excitement or eagerness that comes when an opportunity is first presented to us. It isn’t even the relief that comes once things work out. It is in the process of trusting that God is using our gifts and diligence for good.

So, despite the unknowns lying ahead, you can have hope that everything will work out according to God’s faithful plan.

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!
2 Corinthians 5:17

Free to Move On

Do you feel trapped in a toxic situation or relationship?

I once read a caption that said something along the lines of “If you have bad vibes, you are free to move on with no explanation. This is your life, so even when people question your decisions, it’s not their call to make.”

Now, I don’t know about the whole “bad vibes” thing, but there is definitely truth to the essence of this claim. Our society has been built upon compromising, second-guessing, and putting status above wellbeing for so long. Why can’t we change that?

Recently, I made the tough decision to get out of a toxic situation. I held to my commitment until it was over, but I was under an immense amount of stress that eventually felt unbearable. Now, this decision came at the cost of convenience, temporary “peace”, and having to deal with interrogations from others with different priorities.

This was a decision that affected multiple aspects of my life and has completely altered what the rest of my freshman year of college will look like. I understand why people have questions, especially those who don’t fully know the situation, but what pains me the most is hearing others’ stories of similar situations that they forced themselves to suffer through.

So many people were willing to compromise their mental health, not to mention their sleep and studies, for the sake of avoiding conflict. And I don’t blame them for this decision. After all, that’s how our society has been set up, isn’t it? We keep quiet when we’re being used. We stick with a company that’s treated us unfairly. We maintain relationships with people we’d rather avoid. All for what exactly?

As a Christian, I’ve struggled with setting boundaries and removing myself from difficult circumstances because I’ve held the false belief that we have been commanded to just deal with things as they are. But when Jesus says, “Turn the other cheek”, He doesn’t mean stay in toxic relationships. In fact, He commands us as His disciples to do the opposite.

To clarify, we are to spread the good news to everyone, including those who may have hurt us or who we disagree with. We are supposed to love others the way Jesus loves us. However, that doesn’t mean enabling toxic, manipulative, potentially even abusive behavior. In fact, if we really love someone, we should want to help them grow into the people they are designed to be.

We are all created with a divine purpose. Jesus offers us extraordinary opportunities to see Him in action if we listen and trust Him. In fact, when Jesus first sent out His twelve disciples, they were given miraculous healing powers and the chance to spread the gospel to many, many people.

As Jesus gave them instructions, He added something that we don’t often discuss.

Whatever house you enter, stay there until you leave that town. ⁵If people do not welcome you, leave their town and shake the dust off your feet as a testimony against them.
Luke 9:4-5

Jesus cares about us being treated right. He wants us to be in loving relationships and treated as His precious children.

Of course, this realistically can’t always happen, but when we are given the opportunity to get out of toxic situations and relationships, we need to take them. It isn’t “Christian” to stick around just to get hurt more. Rather, we need to see ourselves the way Jesus sees us–worth more than this.

We are given an important purpose, just as the disciples were. When we are distracted by those whose only intent is to harm us, then we aren’t able to fulfill our purpose the way Jesus intended. But we also don’t need to regret the bad situations we’ve been in either. Jesus will use every part of our story to shape us into the people we are meant to be, and that is a beautiful thing.

Today, if you are trying to step away from something harmful, I want you to remember that no matter what anyone else says, you’re worth it. You don’t owe anyone any explanations. This is your one and only life. Be free to be who God designed you to be.

As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received.
Ephesians 4:1

Jesus, Heal Our Land

Our broken world needs healing more than ever, but how can we obtain that?

I came across a verse this evening that really resonated with me.

If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land.
2 Chronicles 7:14

Now, for a bit of context before we dive into this passage, God is speaking to Solomon right after Solomon dedicated his newly constructed temple to the Lord. Clearly, the Israelites already have a track record of not listening to God after asking for a worldly, human ruler in place of God and constantly looking to other ungodly people groups to gain “inspiration” for how to live. However, even after everything, out of the endless love in His heart, God promises His people that He will listen when they call out to Him.

As you can see, our world is no better than the world during 2 Chronicles. There is so much man-made destruction of relationships, identity, nature, and internal wellbeing. People are dying every day at the hands of others’ selfishness. Others are suffering for the sake of wealth or status or even tradition. None of these things would be happening if God were recognized as our leader because God is just, merciful, and loving. We need deep healing in our land.

You might think that we are too far gone. And truthfully, I often feel that way as well. But God is always willing to give us a second (or millionth) chance. When we cry out, He listens. But we need to be in the right “heart space” in order to have this intimate relationship with God.

And where better to learn than through God’s own instruction?

Humble Yourselves

The first command God gives Solomon for the Israelites relates to humility. Pride (the opposite of humility) is one of our biggest separators from God. When we recognize that our worth comes from God alone, we accept that we need His grace and forgiveness in order to live fully. We cannot do anything by our own strength. The glory must truly go to God.

Pray

Prayer comes in many forms. The traditional list of prayer requests often feels lengthy and unnecessary. But prayers are really just a conversation with God. We need to build in time for listening and accepting the convictions He gives us. That often requires discomfort, but it’s worth it for the sake of growth. And if we have followed the first step, humbling ourselves, then we are more likely to be able to take the changes God wants for us. We are also given the opportunity to experience joy through gratitude during these times of prayer.

Unique ways to pray:

Prayer journaling

Writing letters to God

Singing

Taking a walk through nature and listening for God

Popcorn prayers (going back and forth with another person to list off what needs prayer)

Reading scripture

Seek My Face

We can’t just expect God to be waiting to serve us at our hands and feet. We need to make intentional effort to have a relationship with God too. By reading the Bible, listening for God, and truly having the desire to know Him, we will be able to seek His face. God loves a willing, inquisitive heart and will reward the efforts you make to find Him.

Turn from Your Wicked Ways

Something our culture doesn’t like to hear is that we do actually do things that aren’t right. Shocking, I know.

But seriously, while God loves us no matter what, He doesn’t want us to stay buried in our lives of sin. He wants to free us from the chains sin places on us. Knowing what is a sin and being willing to accept that we aren’t perfect requires all the previous steps (humility and knowing God’s character).

The awesome thing is that when we do things that are wrong, God doesn’t inflict shame upon us the way the world does. Rather, we are given hope that things can get better and that we are designed for greater things.

I hope you will join me in praying for our broken world. My heart goes out to all of you who have truly felt the weight of the world on your shoulders. You are loved. Don’t give up showing God’s light, we need it more than ever.