Tag: Gods timing

Is This Person Right for Me?

Have you met someone you really like, but you aren’t sure if they’re meant for you? Or maybe you had a person in your life that you wish you could get back? Here’s some advice that will hopefully encourage you.

I don’t believe in “right person, wrong time”. I understand the idea. Sometimes, we meet someone who we think is super great, and then things don’t work out. We want to blame anything we can. They weren’t understanding, we weren’t attractive enough, the timing was off. If it had only been different circumstances…

But no, I can’t and won’t believe that. I believe with my entire heart that God places the people in our life at the time when we need them or they need us. Often, it’s mutual benefit, even if we can’t see it at the time. God knows what He’s doing. He’s got a bigger plan, even when we can’t make sense of it.

The thing we don’t want to admit is that this person that we cared so much about wasn’t meant to be in our lives. We may have invested so much into the relationship, whether emotionally or otherwise, and now it’s all gone. But nothing is put to waste, even painful things. Often, those painful things are what bring us closer to God and teach us the valuable lessons we needed to learn before meeting the “right” person.

Speaking of the right person, you may be wondering if the person in your life right now is the person you’re meant to be with. It’s tough to know that for sure, but there are a few things you should look out for before pursuing a relationship with them. If these things apply and you believe God wants you together, then you should go for it! Who knows, you could end up making the second best (after starting a relationship with Jesus, of course 🙂 ) decision of your life!

  1. They love God more than anything else

This one’s a little hard to wrap our heads around. They have to love someone more than us?! But yes, just one other person, or rather, being. If they put God first in their life, then they will make decisions that best help both of you. You will see them grow into an even better person. And their faith and dedication will inspire you. Speaking of which…

2. They help you grow in your faith

This one is just as important. It’s wonderful for the two of you to grow together in your faith. Perhaps you are at different stages, and that’s okay. The most important thing is that you help each other on your faith journey. That can look different for different people. For some, it might be going to church or doing a Bible study together. Maybe you text encouraging verses to each other and discuss what God’s doing in your lives on a regular basis. Whatever it is, they encourage you and strengthen your faith.

3. They pass the “coffee filter” test

You might be confused on this one, and that’s okay. I recently heard of this concept from a mentor in my life who was sharing how she had to do the “coffee filter” test on her husband before they got married.

Let’s be honest, you both will not agree on everything. If you do, then you are not being honest with each other. It’s totally fine, and good actually, to have differences. It makes life interesting and helps you both learn about other perspectives. But there are always a few things that cannot be tolerated, and it’s important to distinguish between the “not preferred” versus the “cannot tolerate”.

When you use a coffee filter, you see how some things can slip through while others are too big and stay at the top. The things that slip through are the differences or slightly annoying characteristics of the other person that you can live with. Maybe these quirks are helping you grow…in patience :). But then there are some no-goes, the things that are too big to ignore or tolerate. If the person cannot change in those areas or you think it would hurt who that person is to change, then they may not be the one for you.

4. They encourage you

I mentioned encouragement in the faith area, but encouragement in other areas of life is important too. Encouragement looks different for different people. Personally, I enjoy personalized compliments and spending quality time together. For others, it might be gifts, exciting adventures, or even just a fresh cup of coffee in the morning.

When someone is a good encourager, it means they care enough to see what encourages you personally. They may not get things right every time, but when you are around them, you feel like the best version of yourself.

5. They help you pursue God’s calling

This one can get tough, because when we care a lot about someone, we only want the best for them. But our best doesn’t always line up with God’s best, and we can often forget that God’s version of “best” is better than ours.

When you have a calling and you know it’s from God, your significant other should encourage you to pursue it and understand why you feel passionately about it. Of course, this doesn’t mean they have to automatically jump up and want to join you, but it does mean they respect your decision and want you to do whatever God leads you to do.

I hope that this advice helps you! This topic means a lot to me personally for many reasons. I grew up in a home where my parents were unequally yoked (one was Christian and the other wasn’t). In some ways, it strengthened my faith because it had to be my own. But in other ways, it deeply saddened me as I had to keep the biggest part of my life to myself when around one of my parents. They also couldn’t connect on the spiritual level nor had the same priorities, which made life less pleasant for them.

I’ve also experienced the feeling of “right person, wrong time”. I really thought this person was the one, and then he wasn’t. That broke my heart, but over time, I’ve realized that God has better things in store for me. It’s taken me a year to figure that out, and I want to help you if you are in the broken hearted stage right now.

A friend once told me, “I’m confident that you will end up with a really good, godly person. And I’m not confident about most things!”

That really encouraged me. As for you, I believe the same thing. If you listen to God and follow His lead, you will end up with just the right person.

Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. 

Ephesians 4:2

Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.

1 Peter 4:8

There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. We love because he first loved us. 

1 John 4:18-19

Owe no one anything, except to love each other, for the one who loves another has fulfilled the law. 

Romans 13:8

Don’t Waste the Waiting

Are you in a season of waiting? Here’s some encouragement!

The time in which I thought God was not moving was actually the time He was moving in my heart.

-Lysa Terkeurst (What Happens When Women Walk in Faith)

I’ve seen the message, “Don’t waste the waiting”, pop up in my life repeatedly over the past several months.

I’m currently taking a psychology class, and we were recently discussing the idea of “nature vs nurture”. I think by nature I want to be laid back and just let things happen, but because of the way I was raised, I always need to be getting things done, or else I feel unsatisfied. I absolutely hate wasting time.

Now, part of that is actually really good. I would probably get into a vicious cycle of letting each day slide by without doing anything if it weren’t for the values of hard work and productiveness being ingrained in me. But as you can see, God telling me to wait would probably cause me to start panicking. I often worry that I’m missing out on something when I’m waiting. I feel stuck.

But as I’ve come to learn recently, when God calls us to wait, He is NOT telling us to sit idly by and allow that to be our excuse for not getting things done. Actually, the waiting period can be one of the most productive and crucial times of our lives.

That’s because the waiting period is where God is preparing us to become our best selves, the person that is ready for the gift at the end of the waiting. Whether you’re waiting for a breakthrough in your career, a romantic relationship, even being able to fulfill your calling in life, don’t waste this season of waiting.

You can use this time to grow closer to God by journaling, praying, and reading your Bible regularly. I know I give that advice a lot, but those are the main ways I grow closer to God, and I know they have worked for many others. Those are the main ways we can hear directly from God. In addition, reach out to others in the same season of life, or even those who are farther along, so that they can encourage and support you. God has placed people in your life for a reason, and even if they let you down sometimes, don’t allow those feelings of disappointment overshadow all the blessings they have brought you. Our community is there to equip us to reach our full potential and pursue God’s calling in our lives.

Waiting isn’t easy, that’s for sure. But it doesn’t have to be an unproductive period of time. And you don’t have to frantically read the entire Bible all in one sitting, hoping that this season will pass quicker. Enjoy the waiting. Enjoy this time that you get to focus on personal growth and on your relationship with God. Don’t just focus on yourself during this time. God wants to use you through every season of life, so go out and find ways to be of service to others.

Give your friend a phone call spontaneously. They may be really encouraged.

Spend some time writing to older members of your community. They love handwritten cards!

Go for a walk and listen to uplifting music. That will give you time to reflect and restart before the beginning of a new week.

I know that this time of being isolated is difficult. Despite there being more opportunities for both virtual and in-person community now than back in the spring, it’s still hard being socially distanced and worrying about spreading a deadly disease by being around people.

But you can still be a blessing without having life go back to normal yet. Now more than ever do people need you to be there for them.

And if you are ever feeling burned out and lonely, remember that God will always be there for you. He will never leave you nor forsake you.

So today, trust God during this time of waiting. Remember that where you are right now is where you are meant to be. God has an amazing purpose in store for you, and He wants you to use this season of waiting in order to become the person you are meant to be. Don’t waste the waiting.

For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence, for my hope is from him.

Psalm 62:5

Where is God Now?

Are you having a tough time trusting God? Here’s some encouragement.

Have you felt like God isn’t there for you?

Have you been doubting your faith lately?

Pause. And ask the simple question of “why?”

Is it because you really believed that God was going to do something for you because you prayed about it and you felt like God was leading you to a certain thing/job/person, but it didn’t work out?

I’ve been there before, friend, and it’s hard. It’s especially hard when that second part comes into play, where we really believe that God is leading us to something or someone, and yet it doesn’t work out. Or at least, it doesn’t work out the way we wanted it to. That’s the key, isn’t it?

I’m here to tell you something that’s hopefully encouraging. Just because something doesn’t go the way you wanted it to or even believed it would, doesn’t mean that God wasn’t leading you to go there or be a part of that person’s life. It just means that God is telling us to wait, because something better is in store if we don’t make rash decisions based on our emotions.

I know that’s difficult. That word, patience, has been resurfacing in my life time and time again over the past two years. But last night, I was reminded of something vital. We may not realize the journey that God is currently having us on until after it’s over. Right now, you may be struggling. Or, you may be just in a season of mundane, unsure of what God wants to do with you. Both are difficult, but God uses every situation, person, and season of our lives for His divine purpose.

I was studying the voyage of the Israelites yesterday with a small group of people, and one woman remarked, “I don’t know what God was doing by making them circle back around and take such a complicated route, especially because of course God could bring them straight to the Promise Land if He wanted to, but I do know that it happened the way it did for a reason because God was leading them.”

If you need a refresher, the Israelites had been freed from slavery and were on a 40-year journey through the wilderness. If anyone got impatient with God, it would make sense for them to have, huh? We get annoyed by waiting a few months, or possibly years, but I’ll bet that most of us haven’t been waiting on God for a specific thing for almost half a century.

You may wonder why God seemed to have abandoned them. But here’s the thing, it wasn’t God who abandoned them. It was the Israelites who abandoned God.

God was faithfully providing for them each day, with food and guiding them in the form of a pillar of smoke. (Wouldn’t it be nice if God led us around with a pillar of smoke today? Decision making would be so easy!) And of course, it was thanks to God that they got out of slavery in the first place, because of the plagues God inflicted on the Egyptians for treating human beings so horribly.

However, when the Israelites got to the Promised Land, they doubted that they would be able to defeat the current people group there and they didn’t believe that God would provide for them, despite all He had done for them in the past.

That’s why God allowed them to wander around for so long. Not because He wanted them to suffer, but because He wanted to teach them to trust Him.

Ouch, I don’t know about you, but I’ve been there before. In that space of waiting, in that time where God wanted me to only focus on Him. Looking back, I was definitely in one journey of my life during my sophomore year of high school. God took away all my distractions– I was struggling in school, I lost a good portion of my friends, and I was struggling with my mental health. I was so confused as to why all these things were happening to me. But looking back, God was preparing me for something greater. God was using that time to draw me closer to Him, through prayer, mentors, and journaling. Then, I hit a major turning point in my life.

I was going through a confirmation program at my church and it was the Saturday before Confirmation Sunday. I was a new driver, and I misjudged a turn, causing me to be in a serious car accident.

In some ways, this would’ve been the straw that broke the camel’s back, so to speak. But God refocused me, and instead of causing me to look at the situation as just one more wrong thing happening in my life, God used this event to strengthen my testimony. I was able to share a testimony the next day that was reflective of God bringing me through the storm, and then reminding me to trust Him, and finally bringing me to a stable place once more.

I have to constantly remind myself of that journey as I now venture through a new one, yet another season of waiting and figuring out how God wants to use me in the future. God eventually led me to the right people, gave me the motivation to improve my grades, and provided mentors in my life to help me work through my personal difficulties (although we all can struggle sometimes, and that’s okay, as long as we don’t just stay “stuck” and we do what we know will help us find peace and restore our minds).

Last night, I was in a conversation with my mom, and she actually said something quite profound. We were discussing some people in my life who I’ve been worried about recently because I’m afraid that they are making decisions that will hurt them in the future. My mom said, “A lot of times in life, we grow impatient. But if we had just waited, then God would’ve given us something better.”

That really got me thinking. What if today, instead of doing something impulsive, we pray? What if we reach out to someone who is a healthy influence in our lives when we are feeling weak instead of turning to someone or something that hurts us? What if we pray for peace of mind instead of an immediate outcome?

Today, think back to a past journey in your life. How has God shown you that He is the One in control and that He’s got this?

Keep listening to God, no matter what. If you do as God leads, no matter the outcome, it was what you were meant to do. And maybe someday it will all make sense. We have something even better than the pillar of smoke. We have the Holy Spirit–God– inside of us, helping us make wise choices each and every day! We are not going through our journeys alone.

God loves you so much and He has an amazing plan for you. We’ve just got to wait and make the most of the season that we are in.

But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.

Isaiah 40:31

FOCUS

My consistent followers on here know that I’m often trying to challenge you, to help you grow. That’s because I am constantly trying to do that for myself, because it’s not in my innate desires. I want to stay within that comfort zone. But God calls us to step away from that pattern of living and be willing to pursue something more.

But today I have two messages, one is a challenge, the other is encouragement.

I’ve felt a tug on my heart to really share this message with you from God.

He wants you to know that He loves you so much. We humans are His favorite creation, the only one truly made in His image. He could’ve made someone completely different from you, but He made YOU because the world needs you. He is proud of you. He loves you more than words can even describe!

Take a moment to close your eyes and breathe in God’s grace. He loves you. He loves you like nobody else can.

Okay, now are you ready for the challenge? 🙂

The word that’s been on my heart lately is this: focus.

We are so easily distracted by the idols of this world: fame, wealth, looks, popularity, etc. We compare ourselves to others who may not be living for God and we want what they have.

But that’s only going to last them for a season. They are only going to feel content for a moment.

But following God’s call on our lives? That kind of satisfaction will last us a lifetime. No– longer! It will bring us into eternity, a perfect eternity, where we can spend forever worshipping God, feeling His abounding love for us, and being in community.

How great does that sound? Simply amazing!

But we need to figure out our priorities before embarking on this challenge.

Take some time today to think about where your heart really is. Is it sucked into a relationship? Is it devoted to your career? Is it in a talent or skill you have?

Those things can all be great.

But remember that God created that other person you love dearly. God created humans to invent things and to be hardworking. God gifted you that amazing ability.

So honor the One that has given us the life we have.

If you put God first, everything else will fall into place. It’s that simple.

Focus your eyes and your heart on what’s going to last.

Once you put your faith and focus on God, everything else will suddenly become clear.

Then you will finally have that ultimate contentment.

Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.

Matthew 22:37

The Message We Ignore

If you need a sign of confirmation that you are exactly where you need to be, this is it. God loves you so much. I encourage you to read this and realize you are not alone in your struggles.

I’m going to say something now that you may not want to hear. But believe it or not, it could also be a message that encourages you.

Our faith was never supposed to be easy. Following Jesus does not mean happiness on Earth or that every prayer is automatically going to be answered the way we want it to be.

A couple days ago, my pastor preached about Jesus calming the storm. She said something that really stuck with me, and I thought I’d share with you.

A common misconception is that when things go wrong for people, it’s because they are not following God’s call. That is completely a lie that the enemy wants you to believe in order to give up on your faith.

“The disciples weren’t going against God’s call. Rather, they were doing exactly what they were supposed to do. That storm was a part of their path, despite how difficult and frightening it was.” (paraphrased)

You may be struggling right now about how to make sense of your current situation. You may feel like God has turned His back on you because things are spiraling out of control.

First of all, I’m so sorry for whatever you are going through. But God has not abandoned you no matter how alone you feel. God loves you and He is bringing you through this in order to make you stronger.

It’s okay to be upset. It’s okay to be disappointed with how things turned out. But you don’t have to just sit in those sorrows and isolate yourself from others or more importantly God. He is the one that can bring you back. He is the one that can heal you, restore you, sustain you. Even if you don’t receive immediate physical healing, turning to God will bring you peace.

God uses other people to speak into your life and encourage you, too. Listen to the ones who love you. Listen to the ones who want to encourage you. Let them support you when you can’t support yourself.

Because you are loved. You are needed. And you are cared about.

Every time I hit my personal rock bottom (it looks different for everyone and that’s okay), I realize that I have experienced this loneliness because God wanted to refocus my attention on what really matters.

I have been in one-sided relationships and it hurts so much. But we have to realize that when we ignore God, when we don’t allow His grace and love to be enough, we are that person in the relationship that isn’t doing their fair share. Who isn’t reciprocating the love. Who isn’t accepting the fact that they are unconditionally loved.

And obviously God has the most perfect love in the world that is so much greater than we can reciprocate. Than we have experienced. If you are reading this then you haven’t died for someone else. That is the ultimate sacrifice that God was willing to make for you because He loves you that much. You are worth saving. Repeat it after me: you. are. worth. saving.

Imagine that pain that I mentioned before about those one-sided relationships. You probably sacrificed a lot for that other person. You may have even given your heart to them, knowing that you wouldn’t get even an ounce of that love back.

But just realize that despite how much you cared about them, God cares about you a billion times more.

A lot of the advice we receive tells us to turn away from those relationships where the other person doesn’t reciprocate. But God will never turn away from our relationship with Him because He is unfailing and completely faithful.

You may have never experienced such loyalty before. That’s probably because as humans we have been taught to always put ourself first. But that’s not the way God works.

God puts His love for you above everything else. And I hope today that you can begin to put your relationship with God above everything else too.

Faith is scary. Faith is hard. But faith is the the thing that completes and establishes our relationship with God. There is no relationship on our end if there is no faith.

So today, even through all your painful struggles, remember that this is not the end. This is not a sign that you are doing the wrong thing.

Listen up. If you feel like God called you to be where you are right now, then you are doing the right thing. If you were looking for a sign saying that you are supposed to continue what you are doing, this is it.

You are beloved. You are treasured. You are loved.

Go out now and spread that message to the world.

You are never going to encounter a greater love than this.

For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, for whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life.

John 3:16

Just a Little Thing

I was inspired by the newest member of my family for this post– Rocky. He’s a two month old puppy who is anything but obedient. He is incredibly dramatic, playful, energetic, smart, and strong-willed. We love him, but it’s very frustrating when he doesn’t understand why we want him to do certain things, like oh I don’t know, maybe use the bathroom outside or not chew up things that don’t belong to him…!?

Sometimes we have to put Rocky in the crate in order to give him alone time to think about what he did wrong and why he needs us to train him. He hates it, but generally he feels better when he calms down and rests.

God gives us seasons where we are stuck (hello quarantine) or unable to fully function the way we want to. Other times, He might cause us to take the time to realize we need to turn to God alone, and not other sources of distraction. It’s up to us, though, whether we will grow and be able to move on from those seasons, or if we will scream and fight our way out.

Rocky is only four pounds and it’s pretty funny (although it gets old really fast) when he tries bossing us around, especially during mealtime. He thinks he deserves things that may hurt him or he isn’t ready for yet. He doesn’t always realize the power we actually have over him and how tiny he truly is in the grand scheme of things.

I think I struggle with this a lot, and you might too. My feelings are so strong, my desires seeming to be so valid, that I forget how minuscule I am in comparison to this entire universe. I forget that I barely know anything next to the Creator of the world. I need to step back and appreciate what God is telling me to do, because He, just like with us for our puppy, wants the best for us. He doesn’t want us to get hurt, but He may allow us to have difficulties in order to learn from them.

Today I challenge you to step back from a world centered around yourself. Instead, think about what God might have for you and what He is calling you to do. We all have a greater purpose that allows us to have a bigger impact.

Whether one door closes or another is opening, God has a plan for everything. We may not understand why things are happening the way they are right now, but eventually I hope you can see that God has been with you and will be with you every step of the way. You can have hope and comfort in the fact that God is in control of your life, no one else.

You will be taken care of.

But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.

Isaiah 40:31

Don’t Question the Timing

“And if everything does not fall into place at the same time and pace, that does not mean that the years you’ve waited have somehow been a waste. Keep planting, sowing, living and knowing that beautiful things take time..and that’s okay.”

Morgan Harper Nichols

“When you start to feel like things should have been better this year, remember the mountains and valleys that got you here. They are not accidents, and those moments weren’t in vain. You are not the same. You have grown, and you are growing. You are breathing, you are living, you are wrapped in endless, boundless grace. And things will get better. There is more to you than yesterday.”

Morgan Harper Nichols

A lot of times, the timing of events doesn’t feel right. We don’t want to wait. We are angry about things being cancelled. We are disappointed because things coincided or were too far apart to make the difference we wanted. Especially now, with so many things disrupted with the virus.

For those Seniors out there, those retiring teachers, those people who planned a big trip…I am truly sorry for you. It’s got to be really hard. It is really hard. It’s hard for all of us in our own unique ways.

But I think there can be blessings behind the timing of events, too. If we are willing to admit to God’s plan instead of our own.

My amazing friend was supposed to come visit for my birthday, and I was super excited about it. But as the stay at home order extends, that didn’t happen, and doesn’t seem to be likely for at least a month or so. However, my birthday was last week, and now I believe it was God’s timing to have us wait on her visit.

On my birthday, my dog passed away and this friend had a painful health issue arise, which is thankfully healed now. However, if those things had happened during the visit, there would’ve been even more stress, and God is making us wait for a time when He will make it better.

God’s plan is always better than ours. Repeat that to yourself. ALWAYS.

That’s really hard to remember. I struggle with it a lot. I am pretty impatient, and I get frustrated easily with God’s pacing. I was really upset with how things worked out with timing last week, actually. But looking back, I understand it was because God wants me to trust Him and see how He is working through everything.

God’s plan never fails. NEVER. And that’s something that should bring a smile and a sigh of relief to you. A lot of things don’t make sense at the time, but if you look back at other times in your life when things didn’t make sense, you may see how God worked it out in the end.

It’s ok to pray and ask God all your questions. He will listen and He will answer. But just remember that sometimes His answer isn’t what you wanted to hear. However, chances are it’s even better.

I know this was a tough read, and I struggle with doubting God, doubting the timing, and being downright angry with God about things not going the way I want.

But I had a conversation with a mentor of mine a few days ago, and she reminded me that we shouldn’t pray for our will, but for God’s will, because in the end, that’s what we should want if we want the best life possible.

I have faith that you are strong enough to get through whatever storms come in your way. But just remember that you don’t have to go through it alone. God brings us through storms to bring us closer to Him and to those who love us.

“ He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.”

Ecclesiastes 3:11