Enduring Pain

If you feel stuck, trying to figure out if there is any good that can come from your pain, keep reading.

A random skill that most people wouldn’t know I have is being a pretty good back massager. You heard me right…and you’re probably wondering why you’re still reading!

Well, I’ll get to the point…soon. You know how we Nines love our stories 😉

My mom used to tell people that she had a daughter simply to get free back massages, and a small part of me occasionally wonders if that’s true considering the frequency at which she requests them. As humans age, as you may know from experience, they often experience muscle stiffness. Tonight I was helping my mom get a knot out of her back, and after the allotted time I had agreed to perform this service was up, I asked if she wanted me to continue. She laughed and replied, “I would like that, but I don’t think I can endure the pain.”

This part may not surprise you, if you know me at all. After she said that, I suddenly knew I had to blog. Not about muscles, weird skills, or getting old. But rather, about pain.

About a year ago, one of my first posts was about pain and how many people often use numbing mechanisms to avoid it. Little did I know that throughout this past year, I’ve struggled with dealing with my pain and negative emotions. I often choose to not feel things, but then that includes the positive, happy memories as well.

I think avoiding pain can be one of our biggest mistakes in life. The longer we avoid the pain, the longer we avoid the good that can come out of that pain. God does not take us through difficult seasons without a reason. He knows that there’s something better at the end, but we just have to persevere. And sometimes that means trying something again that may have previously hurt us.

Now, I’m not telling you to go and let people walk all over you. I don’t want you to get into a dangerous situation or go backwards on a process towards good health. But if God is calling you to try something again, whether it’s a relationship, a career, a hobby, or perhaps even just diving back in your Bible, then you should go for it.

We love making excuses as to why we can’t possibly embrace our pain. We tell ourselves that we can’t endure it. And we’re right, we can’t.

At least, we can’t alone.

But God is always with us and He will give us the strength to get through anything.

I’ve seen so many people go through things I could never imagine going through with such bravery. They continue to live for God, they continue to go about their daily lives, and they will still be heroes, such strong people, in my eyes when they admit their pain and sorrow.

Don’t allow fear of people’s reactions to affect how you grieve, whether it’s the loss of a loved one, a relationship, or a forgotten dream. The ones who are meant to be in your life and really care about you will give you the space to feel what you need to feel.

I know it’s hard trying again. I know it’s hard doing what God calls us to do. I’m not going to sit here and expect you to suddenly change your life or do things that risk heartbreak alone. I’m going to try to get out of my comfort zone and figure out my emotions as well, in a healthy way.

I know that we can both get through whatever life throws at us because we are empowered by our Creator. God loves us and designed us to need Him, and when we turn to Him, we will overflow with His grace, courage, and perseverance.

I’ll be praying for you. Don’t give up. ❤

Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him.

James 1:2

You are Never Alone

Whatever you’re going through, always remember that you are never alone.

“In her lowest place she found grace, the strength, the courage, the room, the space to move and live and breathe again.”

Morgan Harper Nichols

           A lot of us find ourselves in a place where we truly believe we are alone. Forever alone.

            Maybe a relationship ended. Maybe one never began. Maybe a longtime friendship fell apart. Maybe a loved one is gone. Or maybe the doubts are just seeping in more than usual.

            Whatever place your in right now, I want you to close your eyes. Take a deep breath. You’re still here for a reason.

            And it’s to touch others’ lives.

            I know that right now that might be hard to believe. Some days feel just too difficult to get up, much less actually change the world.

            What a large task, changing the world.

            But the best news is, despite all that your mind is telling you, you’re never alone.

            When I was first in that place where I needed to hear those words, I didn’t actually realize that it was a common phrase of encouragement. Sometimes when phrases become a second nature to us, we forget their true meaning.

            So I feel fortunate that the time I heard it, I believed those words and felt like they were everything I needed to keep going.

            Okay, maybe not everything. I still had doubts. I still felt alone sometimes.

            But it gave me hope.

            You may have heard the phrase “you are never alone” hundreds of times. Maybe they have lost their meaning for you. But I hope today that you can read them with fresh eyes. I wish I could say them to you in person.

            I want you to feel them. Let them sink in.

            You are never alone.

            Now, you might think, Hannah, you don’t know what kind of situation I’m in!

            That’s true, I don’t. I can’t pretend to understand what you are going through.

            But I do know this. God will always be there waiting for you. He is the One who will not leave you alone in a pit of despair. He is the One who will lift you out and make you into His perfect creation.

            I also know something else.

            At least one person is praying for you. At least one person cares about you.

            I am praying for you and I care about you. I don’t know anything about you, but I know that you are worthy of being cared about.

            Nothing you did could ever separate you from the love of God. Absolutely nothing.

            You are priceless. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. Nothing about you can change that, either. Not your looks, your career, your quirks, your awkward moments, your mistakes.

            Because those things aren’t going to last forever.

            Love is the only thing that can truly bind us together, forever, with the One who gave us life in the first place.

            So let love fill your heart. There is still hope. You will be able to love again. You will be loved again. And you are currently loved by the One who knows how to love the best.

            And remember, no matter what you are facing, you are never alone.

The Lord appeared to him from far away. I have loved you with an everlasting love; therefore I have continued my faithfulness to you.

Jeremiah 31:3

Surrender

Don’t let what appears to be a fight with a person sway you from your purpose of loving others.

We all have our weaknesses. Every character, whether an average person or a superhero, has their one flaw (at least one!). That’s one of the most accurate parts of media, I think, is revealing that we are all human whether we like to believe it or not.

The thing is, it’s super easy to pick out someone else’s flaws, but it’s rather difficult to find our own. We don’t like to admit that we’re selfish, inconsiderate, or quick tempered. We don’t want to think that while we’re hurt by others, we are also capable of causing the hurt.

Sometimes God uses people to test us, to see if we are really loving, patient, and kind.

We can show all the compassion and sweetness in the world to the people who don’t push our buttons as easily. We can talk all day about how we are going to spread Jesus’ love when we are surrounded by people we find easy to be kind to.

But when that person comes around who always just says the wrong thing? That thing that makes you want to escape yourself and silence them. Perhaps it’s a family member or a friend. Maybe this person isn’t even that close to you, yet you must see them on a regular basis.

We all have that person who just gets under our skin and tests us.

I recently have felt surrounded by people who have in the past and are currently just driving me crazy. But this time, I’m realizing that perhaps it’s because I’m letting them.

I’m letting my temper get away from me. I’m letting my feelings of bitterness overwhelm God’s voice in my life.

Today’s sermon from my church was about Jesus being kind and healing the daughter of a woman from a community that had, in the past, been against His own. Yet, Jesus was impressed by her faith and used her as an example to His own community for what true faith should look like.

God can use anyone for His glory, even the people that get on our nerves.

And chances are, He’s even using them to change you, too.

Perhaps God is convicting you of these hard feelings you have against them. Or maybe it’s your own personality flaw that needs to get worked on.

I know I have so many things I struggle with and sometimes these people are testing me to see if I will fall back on my old ways of living.

Don’t let the enemy win. That’s who you are really in a battle against, not your friend, or family member, or neighbor. No. It’s the enemy trying to get you to falter.

Don’t give him that satisfaction.

Instead, let these people help you grow into a patient, truly loving person, who God is so proud of.

I know you can do this. Let God’s voice speak into your life, whether it is something you may not have wanted to hear, like conviction, or something to encourage you.

Today is the first day of the future for you. No need to turn back. You can start fresh today.

Today you can finally surrender those feelings of resentment, that annoyance you feel towards that person, or persons.

I am praying that you can get through this. God is with you.

Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye?

Matthew 7:3-4

No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.

Romans 8:37

What Do You Actually Want?

God doesn’t see us the way everyone else does.

Two posts in one day? Apparently yes!

My friends know I love good analogies, so hopefully this one suits your fancy!

I was watching my dog, Rocky, who I’ve talked about a few times on here. He basically attacks us while we are eating by jumping all around, barking, and scratching up our legs, unless we give him what he wants.

We decided to get him a can of dog food that he hasn’t had in a while to hopefully trick his sense of smell into thinking he was getting the same food as us.

He wagged his tail eagerly, waiting in anticipation, knowing exactly what he wanted…or so we thought.

The garbage bin usually sits out in the kitchen during dinner and is unfortunately just the right height for him to stick his little black nose into. After we opened the can and scooped out the food, we threw the can into the bin. Instead of running over to get the food, he raced to the trash to check out that can.

He was so focused on the outer wrapper that he didn’t pay attention to what was good for him, what was actually what he needed and wanted.

I think we can get distracted by the “wrapper” in life, too.

We see the fixings of a life that appears to be perfect. We see a person that has stunning looks. We see a memory or something we are clinging onto with rose colored glasses.

God gives and He takes away. He doesn’t want us to be so caught up in the wrapper; He wants us to go after the deeper meaning in life, in relationships, and in His call on our lives.

Don’t settle, whether it’s for a person, a job, or what you think you want out of life if it’s anything other than what God’s calling you to.

God knows what He’s doing. He’s the only one who can see the future. He’s the one who planned it! And He planned it with you in mind, the one He loves so very much.

When you see a person, don’t think about their appearance, give them a chance regardless of how they look. Treat everyone with God’s gentleness, grace, and kindness.

When you see an opportunity, think about if it’s what God wants you to do. Pray about it. Don’t just go for something because you are afraid of missing out. But at the same time, if you think God is calling you to do it, then go for it! Take that leap of faith!

God’s got your back, you don’t have to stress anymore.

After all, just like how we are striving to look deep inside everything in our lives, God sees deep inside of us. He isn’t ever distracted by the wrapper. He loves every part of you, and He knows that desire, the longing in the core of your being.

And I hope that desire is to be just like the One who sacrificed it all because of His unfailing love for us.

You’re worth so much more than you think.

For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.

1 Sammuel 16:7

FOCUS

My consistent followers on here know that I’m often trying to challenge you, to help you grow. That’s because I am constantly trying to do that for myself, because it’s not in my innate desires. I want to stay within that comfort zone. But God calls us to step away from that pattern of living and be willing to pursue something more.

But today I have two messages, one is a challenge, the other is encouragement.

I’ve felt a tug on my heart to really share this message with you from God.

He wants you to know that He loves you so much. We humans are His favorite creation, the only one truly made in His image. He could’ve made someone completely different from you, but He made YOU because the world needs you. He is proud of you. He loves you more than words can even describe!

Take a moment to close your eyes and breathe in God’s grace. He loves you. He loves you like nobody else can.

Okay, now are you ready for the challenge? 🙂

The word that’s been on my heart lately is this: focus.

We are so easily distracted by the idols of this world: fame, wealth, looks, popularity, etc. We compare ourselves to others who may not be living for God and we want what they have.

But that’s only going to last them for a season. They are only going to feel content for a moment.

But following God’s call on our lives? That kind of satisfaction will last us a lifetime. No– longer! It will bring us into eternity, a perfect eternity, where we can spend forever worshipping God, feeling His abounding love for us, and being in community.

How great does that sound? Simply amazing!

But we need to figure out our priorities before embarking on this challenge.

Take some time today to think about where your heart really is. Is it sucked into a relationship? Is it devoted to your career? Is it in a talent or skill you have?

Those things can all be great.

But remember that God created that other person you love dearly. God created humans to invent things and to be hardworking. God gifted you that amazing ability.

So honor the One that has given us the life we have.

If you put God first, everything else will fall into place. It’s that simple.

Focus your eyes and your heart on what’s going to last.

Once you put your faith and focus on God, everything else will suddenly become clear.

Then you will finally have that ultimate contentment.

Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.

Matthew 22:37

Admit What You Need

Admit it when you need help in order to build better relationships– both with God and with loved ones.

A lot of times I hide how I feel or what I need because I don’t want to bother others. At least, that’s what I often tell myself when justifying not reaching out.

But another major reason why I’m hesitant to reach out to people with my desires is because I don’t want to admit that I’m weak, insufficient, and not completely capable of everything. I don’t want to crush this false illusion in my mind that I’ve somehow proven to others that I am basically inhuman in my abilities to be self-sufficient.

This only hurts my relationships with others, and this mindset of not wanting to be vulnerable hurts our relationship with God too.

Let’s be honest, some people truly don’t want to see our less-than-perfect side. They only want us when we can help them.

But God isn’t like that. Not one little bit.

He wants our ENTIRE heart. He wants the brokenness because only He can make it beautiful. He wants to comfort us. He wants to sustain us. He wants to give us strength.

But He isn’t going to arrive uninvited. We have to let Him in if we want His help.

The same goes for people. If we act like nothing is wrong, then people will assume we are fine. We need to be willing to be human in order to get the help that we need. We have to be vulnerable in order for others to feel truly comfortable with us.

Not only does this help us, but it strengthens our relationships, both with people and with God.

We show God that we are willing to allow Him to use all the areas of our life, including the things we’d rather leave unexposed.

So today, allow the people who really care about you into your life, both the good and bad. Tell them if you need something, and be willing to let them be vulnerable with you too.

In addition, think about the areas of your life where you’ve held back from showing your true self to God. Ask Him to show you the areas where you need to let go and allow Him to take over. God will help you through any struggle you are going through, as long as you let Him in.

More than anything, remember that you are never a burden. You don’t have to always be strong. Allow yourself to be immersed in the love and comfort that God and your loved ones want to give you.

You are enough.

For he has not despised or scorned

    the suffering of the afflicted one;

he has not hidden his face from him

    but has listened to his cry for help.

Psalm 22:24

After the Prayer

Prayer is a good first step, but when is it time to take action?

Prayer is the most important spiritual practice you can take part in. However, it can be misused in a way that actually harms you. Often, we say we’ll pray about something, and that’s wonderful. But then we can use it as an excuse to not take action. If things don’t happen related to the issue, we blame God instead of ourselves.

I know that I’ve done this before. If I’m afraid, I’ll just tell myself that God will handle it for me once I pray. Of course God should be a source of comfort and peace. Yet, He does not want us to sit idly by and not do the work to make progress.

I know this might be a tough love moment, but in the end, your relationship with God will strengthen if you are willing to do more than pray.

Instead of praying something specific, pray that God’s will can be done and that God will give you the strength to do the hard thing. We should ultimately want God’s will to be done because, as I talked about in my most recent post, we can either choose to accept what’s happening and trust God or begrudging stomp our feet and refuse to move forward in life. Then we miss out on the many blessings God has in store for us.

Today, reflect on areas of your life where you may not be putting in the work. Perhaps the conflict could be resolved through you talking to someone. Perhaps you are actually being called to give up something in order to help someone else. Perhaps you are meant to take that risk you’ve been worrying about.

There are certainly situations in which we simply can’t do anything but pray. And that’s okay. But just take the time to figure out whether God is calling you to take action.

Ultimately, it is crucial to pray in order to strengthen our relationship with God and to have peace about situations. But nothing can be done if we aren’t willing to follow God’s call on our lives.

You can certainly pray for strength, perseverance, and clarity. That’s a wonderful thing to do. But after that, just go for it! You can do this, I believe in you. And most of all, God is with you, so you have nothing to be afraid of ❤

If God is for us, who can be against us?

Romans 8:31

Living in the Moment

Living in the moment is the way to find true satisfaction.

I talk about living without regrets all the time, but I just want to say that sometimes you might be called to do things that seem so strange. Not classy, not popular. But it’s what you are supposed to do in order to follow God’s plan for your life. You just have to go for it, even if it doesn’t make sense.

Take every opportunity you can because you never know what tomorrow might hold.

All the wonderful things that have happened in my life were not planned. All the terrible things that have happened in my life were unanticipated. No human can truly fathom the future God has made for us.

So it’s important to live in the moment. Don’t look back at the mistakes you can’t make up for. Don’t be anxious about the future, that’s what we are commanded to do. I know it’s hard and it’s okay to have those feelings, so long as we are actively fighting against them. We cannot let fear win. Fear is only dangerous when it is given power by us.

Today make the effort to go out of your way for someone else. You might be the only one who does.

Today do something you’ve always wanted to do. You may have found a new passion for life!

Today ask God what His plan is for your life instead of praying specific things. Ultimately, God’s plan is the best one, and it’s what’s going to happen. Might as well go with it willingly than be dragged along, right? After all, He does have our best interest in mind.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

Philippians 4:6

The Message We Ignore

If you need a sign of confirmation that you are exactly where you need to be, this is it. God loves you so much. I encourage you to read this and realize you are not alone in your struggles.

I’m going to say something now that you may not want to hear. But believe it or not, it could also be a message that encourages you.

Our faith was never supposed to be easy. Following Jesus does not mean happiness on Earth or that every prayer is automatically going to be answered the way we want it to be.

A couple days ago, my pastor preached about Jesus calming the storm. She said something that really stuck with me, and I thought I’d share with you.

A common misconception is that when things go wrong for people, it’s because they are not following God’s call. That is completely a lie that the enemy wants you to believe in order to give up on your faith.

“The disciples weren’t going against God’s call. Rather, they were doing exactly what they were supposed to do. That storm was a part of their path, despite how difficult and frightening it was.” (paraphrased)

You may be struggling right now about how to make sense of your current situation. You may feel like God has turned His back on you because things are spiraling out of control.

First of all, I’m so sorry for whatever you are going through. But God has not abandoned you no matter how alone you feel. God loves you and He is bringing you through this in order to make you stronger.

It’s okay to be upset. It’s okay to be disappointed with how things turned out. But you don’t have to just sit in those sorrows and isolate yourself from others or more importantly God. He is the one that can bring you back. He is the one that can heal you, restore you, sustain you. Even if you don’t receive immediate physical healing, turning to God will bring you peace.

God uses other people to speak into your life and encourage you, too. Listen to the ones who love you. Listen to the ones who want to encourage you. Let them support you when you can’t support yourself.

Because you are loved. You are needed. And you are cared about.

Every time I hit my personal rock bottom (it looks different for everyone and that’s okay), I realize that I have experienced this loneliness because God wanted to refocus my attention on what really matters.

I have been in one-sided relationships and it hurts so much. But we have to realize that when we ignore God, when we don’t allow His grace and love to be enough, we are that person in the relationship that isn’t doing their fair share. Who isn’t reciprocating the love. Who isn’t accepting the fact that they are unconditionally loved.

And obviously God has the most perfect love in the world that is so much greater than we can reciprocate. Than we have experienced. If you are reading this then you haven’t died for someone else. That is the ultimate sacrifice that God was willing to make for you because He loves you that much. You are worth saving. Repeat it after me: you. are. worth. saving.

Imagine that pain that I mentioned before about those one-sided relationships. You probably sacrificed a lot for that other person. You may have even given your heart to them, knowing that you wouldn’t get even an ounce of that love back.

But just realize that despite how much you cared about them, God cares about you a billion times more.

A lot of the advice we receive tells us to turn away from those relationships where the other person doesn’t reciprocate. But God will never turn away from our relationship with Him because He is unfailing and completely faithful.

You may have never experienced such loyalty before. That’s probably because as humans we have been taught to always put ourself first. But that’s not the way God works.

God puts His love for you above everything else. And I hope today that you can begin to put your relationship with God above everything else too.

Faith is scary. Faith is hard. But faith is the the thing that completes and establishes our relationship with God. There is no relationship on our end if there is no faith.

So today, even through all your painful struggles, remember that this is not the end. This is not a sign that you are doing the wrong thing.

Listen up. If you feel like God called you to be where you are right now, then you are doing the right thing. If you were looking for a sign saying that you are supposed to continue what you are doing, this is it.

You are beloved. You are treasured. You are loved.

Go out now and spread that message to the world.

You are never going to encounter a greater love than this.

For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, for whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life.

John 3:16

Just a Little Thing

I was inspired by the newest member of my family for this post– Rocky. He’s a two month old puppy who is anything but obedient. He is incredibly dramatic, playful, energetic, smart, and strong-willed. We love him, but it’s very frustrating when he doesn’t understand why we want him to do certain things, like oh I don’t know, maybe use the bathroom outside or not chew up things that don’t belong to him…!?

Sometimes we have to put Rocky in the crate in order to give him alone time to think about what he did wrong and why he needs us to train him. He hates it, but generally he feels better when he calms down and rests.

God gives us seasons where we are stuck (hello quarantine) or unable to fully function the way we want to. Other times, He might cause us to take the time to realize we need to turn to God alone, and not other sources of distraction. It’s up to us, though, whether we will grow and be able to move on from those seasons, or if we will scream and fight our way out.

Rocky is only four pounds and it’s pretty funny (although it gets old really fast) when he tries bossing us around, especially during mealtime. He thinks he deserves things that may hurt him or he isn’t ready for yet. He doesn’t always realize the power we actually have over him and how tiny he truly is in the grand scheme of things.

I think I struggle with this a lot, and you might too. My feelings are so strong, my desires seeming to be so valid, that I forget how minuscule I am in comparison to this entire universe. I forget that I barely know anything next to the Creator of the world. I need to step back and appreciate what God is telling me to do, because He, just like with us for our puppy, wants the best for us. He doesn’t want us to get hurt, but He may allow us to have difficulties in order to learn from them.

Today I challenge you to step back from a world centered around yourself. Instead, think about what God might have for you and what He is calling you to do. We all have a greater purpose that allows us to have a bigger impact.

Whether one door closes or another is opening, God has a plan for everything. We may not understand why things are happening the way they are right now, but eventually I hope you can see that God has been with you and will be with you every step of the way. You can have hope and comfort in the fact that God is in control of your life, no one else.

You will be taken care of.

But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.

Isaiah 40:31