Tag: Disappointment

Let Yourself Feel Joy

Do you avoid hoping for fear of disappointment?

It’s so easy to allow fear to steal away the best moments of our lives.

Fear may come in the form of rationality or jadedness. Perhaps we just “know” that things never stay good for long. And what do we expect, in this broken world?

But if we never allow ourselves to feel joy, then what are we living for?

You may feel stronger by not getting your hopes up. By saying that things always end up in disappointment. By not being surprised when hard times come.

But what if that isn’t strength? What if that’s giving into fear?

Fear of not being in control of your life. Fear of not truly knowing how long good things will last.

We can’t experience joy until we fully accept that we aren’t in control.

It’s a hard truth to come to grips with, especially in the face of so many tragedies, both in our personal lives and in the world. The ache of disappointment. The heartbreak of rejection. But holding onto a false sense of security only hurts us.

And most of all, it robs us of the beauty life can bring.

So, how can we fully experience joy?

By making the most of the little things. By taking each day as it comes. By not judging yourself too hard when you feel yourself regressing or not living up to the impossible standards society demands of us.

It’s okay if you don’t feel happy today. But you don’t have to be happy to feel grateful. Grateful that the sun still rose today. Grateful for the people who are always there for you. Grateful for a moment to rest.

Expect disappointment, and that’s what you’ll get. But hope for something more? Then you’ll surely have a higher chance of finding joy.

The truest source of joy comes from Jesus, who never changes. His plans are far greater than anything we could ever imagine. While we may be disappointed in the moment, Jesus promises that our lives aren’t wasted. He will restore our joy. ❤

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.

Romans 15:13

Exchanging Disappointment for Joy

Does disappointment cause you to doubt God’s purpose for your life?

This weekend, I was supposed to go on a retreat about finding God’s presence.

I was so ready for the retreat, too. Mostly just wanting an escape from the humdrum of normal life, burned out by my responsibilities, and eager for a change in scenery. Every day that I was tired or weary, I reminded myself that I’d have a break soon enough.

So then, when it got cancelled, I was puzzled by what God was doing. Surprisingly, I was less disappointed than I had anticipated, which may have been God’s clue that He still had plans for me this weekend.

The things I had longed for were inspiration, rest, appreciation for God’s creation, and connection with others.

And instead of bringing me to a conference center, God gave me inspiration through a movie night with family. He gave me rest by allowing me to have generous bosses who still let me have the weekend off. He gave me appreciation for His creation through the gorgeous sunset I experienced while driving home last night.

And most of all, God showed me how interwoven His presence is within our relationships with others.

I thought I had to take a break from people in order to experience God, but instead I spent all day yesterday going from one person to the next.

But the difference between that and my everyday encounters was that I went into those interactions with a willing heart. And that changed everything.

There is truly a season for everything. A season to reflect with God alone, and a season to extend the love God has given us to others. And maybe those two things can come together to create something even more beautiful.

Going broader than simply this weekend, I’ve been in a season where many of my expectations have been dashed. I’ve wondered where my dreams and desires fit into God’s greater plan for me. But this weekend, I’ve discovered something new.

It isn’t always about God’s plan or my plan or any sort of plan. It’s about taking things one step at a time and experiencing God’s presence through it all.

It’s about waiting for God with an open heart. It’s about connecting with others from a place of love and appreciation, as well as setting boundaries when we know we are agreeing to things out of obligation. It’s about opening the Bible without expecting a new game plan, and rather soaking in time with God.

Today, I hope you can exchange your disappointment for joy.

Things may not look the way you had hoped, but this is an opportunity for you to trust God more than ever. He will be with you through it all. ❤

 I am going to send you what my Father has promised; but stay in the city until you have been clothed with power from on high.

Luke 24:49

Don’t Be Upset When God Gives You What You Asked For

What if I told you that God answers all your prayers, just not in the way you expect?

I’ve heard so many stories of Christians leaving their faith because God “didn’t come through for them”. God didn’t give them the person, the opportunity, or the emotion they were hoping for. God was too late.

And why have Christians been set up to believe that God will give them what they want? Because the Bible says so!

Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.

Matthew 7:7

Whatever you ask in my name, this I will do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you ask me anything in my name, I will do it.

John 14:13-14

The list could go on and on. Yet we don’t always get what we ask for, do we?

Often, we try to use logic to explain away the disappointment. God can’t possibly give everyone what they want, right? What about prayers that contradict each other or those that come from evil intentions?

While those remarks are reasonable, they also place a limit on God’s power. God could make it all work, if that was how things should be.

I believe that God does give us what we ask for. But there are two qualifications that we often forget about when things don’t work out the way we planned.

The first comes from other verses regarding God’s answers to our prayers.

If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you.

John 15:7

Often, we forget about our end of the bargain. We need to want what God wants in order for our requests to be granted. When we align our will with God’s, we will never be disappointed.

God will give us a starting point towards the end goal, but we need to actively participate in this relationship too. It’s like a scholarship for college. An organization believes in you and will fund your way, but you need to do the actual work of obtaining the degree.

God gives you the means, but you have the free will to decide if you will use those gifts to become the person you were created to be, the best version of yourself, or let those blessings slip away.

The second thing to think about is that God does answer every prayer, but He never promises to answer them in the way we thought He would.

Imagine that you are asking to grow in patience. Don’t be surprised if that means you will find yourself surrounded by people who push your buttons. Of course, you didn’t ask God to give you annoying people, but you will certainly grow in patience after the experience.

Or consider the noble prayer of asking for greater trust in God. You will likely be pushed out of your comfort zone with the only option to either trust God or bail off the ship. That may not be pleasant, but you certainly won’t be the same afterwards.

Even prayers like asking God for a loving marriage partner or a career that makes a difference can result in seasons of waiting or humbling jobs that will prepare you for the person or opportunity you desire.

God will give you what you need, but He wants you to be equipped first.

I believe that God answers every prayer because I have often made requests such as those listed above, and found myself in troubling, trying situations. Through the thick of it, I get upset, wondering if God ever answered my prayers.

But when I look back, I am amazed by how those were the seasons I learned the most and came out of the strongest. I often got what I asked for, whether that was comfort from God, a new experience, or growth. But it didn’t come in the form that I had envisioned, which is why I couldn’t appreciate what was happening in the moment.

Fortunately, we have a very patient and understanding God, who is willing to wait for us to figure things out before we are grateful.

This doesn’t mean you should stop asking God for things, especially virtues or traits that would make you more like Christ, even though the way to get those things may be difficult. Instead, I hope these words can encourage you during the journey.

God has not forgotten you. He has heard you and He will transform you into the person you were created to be.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.

Philippians 4:6-8

Holding Onto Hope

Don’t let anyone steal the hope you have in Jesus.

Have you ever been overwhelmed with disappointment and discouragement, maybe even to the point of despair?

The closest I’ve come to despair was last summer. It felt like one disappointment after another kept hitting me on the head. The final straw was losing a close friend over a petty argument and regretting everything. But it was too late. Nothing I could do would solve this catastrophe.

Disappointment is often tied to two things: our inadequacies and lack of control.

When we fixate on what we can’t do, we are left feeling helpless and afraid. Afraid because we are faced with the sharp reality that we can’t dodge pain. We will never be unbreakable. We are, in fact, fallible.

And when we realize we aren’t perfect, we must admit that even if we were in control, things wouldn’t work out the way they were meant to. We weren’t created to be in control. Now that’s a hard pill to swallow.

I bet Jesus’ followers were in despair when they saw Him on the cross. They had faced constant persecution from an oppressive government, but they finally found a Savior. They finally had hope.

Disappointment requires a dashing of hope. That glimmer of light fading into nothingness.

And then, to see their only hope dying a humiliating death…reminding them that we are all breakable…well, that would just feel like the end, wouldn’t it?

But Jesus isn’t fallible. Jesus is perfect. Whole. In control.

And that’s why, three days later, their hopes would never be dashed again. Jesus’ resurrection makes all things new. All things alive, even our hopes and dreams.

Sure, their earthly desires wouldn’t often come to pass. They may have lost many close friends, regretted misspoken words or deeds, and suffered great losses.

But in the end, they could still have hope, and so can we. Hope that we have someone watching over us who loves us so much that He was willing to die for us.

Don’t lose hope. Something greater is coming. In fact, He’s already here. ❤

Happy Easter! He is risen! He is risen, indeed!

Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live, even though they die; and whoever lives by believing in me will never die. Do you believe this?”

John 11:25-26

Why Saying Goodbye to a Comfort Character Feels Real

Have you ever wondered why a piece of you feels missing after a favorite series ends?

Have you ever felt close to a fictional character? Perhaps it’s the way they talk or make you laugh or help you feel less alone. But then, when the inevitable time comes for the show or series to end, you’re left feeling empty inside, like you are losing a real friend. Whoever the character is, they make you feel seen or cared about in some strange, unexplainable way.

If you’ve shed a tear or lost a night’s sleep over a fictional character, you’re in good company. Perhaps it’s the increased accessibility to media or the fact that people feel lonelier than ever these days, but losing a character who makes you valued can be heartbreaking.

However, if you’ve shared this experience, you may have also felt silly for getting upset by someone “not real”. Yet these feelings are more valid than you might realize.

After spending the past couple years far away from loved ones and living through our screens, it’s only natural for our minds to merge our “real” relationships with our “on-screen” ones. The awesome thing about technology is how we are able to connect with people from all over the world. However, that also means many of our relationships are long distance, and our sense of reality gets altered.

Therefore, when our brains convince us that these characters are real friends, we feel like we’re experiencing a real loss. This may trigger past experiences of ending a relationship, losing a loved one, or having a source of security become unstable.

You are free to feel grief when a source of comfort is lost or a season has come to an end.

But, we don’t have to stay stuck in those feelings.

We have someone very real, despite also not being tangible, who is right here with us. And, you guessed it, Jesus is the best source of comfort.

Jesus doesn’t change. He will always be loving and powerful and patient. He will always be there for you, no matter what you are going through or what you’re feeling.

Just think about that for a moment: Jesus doesn’t ever change. We can’t even fathom that because everything–our Earth, our society, our loved ones, us–change. And that’s what makes us crave comfort or stability.

But Jesus promises that He will be faithful to the end and even after the end. He wants us to cling to Him when we feel afraid or unloved or isolated. Jesus will remind us that He is our source of courage and He paid the ultimate sacrifice to be there for us. We are never alone.

So today, don’t feel guilty for whatever you’re feeling. Instead, bring all these complicated emotions to God and allow yourself to feel comforted knowing that there will always be one thing that never changes.

Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.

Hebrews 13:8

Holy Week Series: When Jesus “Lets Us Down”

Beginning our Holy Week series, we will start off with asking the question, “How do we react when Jesus ‘lets us down’?”
Advice for your faith journey!

Last year, I posted several days leading up to Easter, and that really brought me closer to God, as well as it hopefully helped you all get prepared for our celebration of the biggest event in history! So I thought I’d do it again this year!

Starting off this year’s series, we’re going to talk about everyone’s least favorite person–Judas. Now, I know you might think you’ve got him figured out. He’s a greedy, scumbag sort of dude, right? That’s it, his story’s over, moving on to someone better…

But actually, he’s deeper than that and we owe it to ourselves to learn everything we can from the story of Jesus’ death and resurrection.

When I first read the Easter story in the Bible, I hated Judas. I think we all have some right to. After all, he did betray Jesus. He’s the one we all blame since he’s the one who saw all the miracles Jesus did, heard all the teachings, felt all the love…and yet still handed Him over to be brutally killed.

I used to think Judas did these things for a few silver coins, all out of greed. But actually, there’s a deeper reason behind Judas’ actions. He strongly opposed the Roman government, which many Jews at that time did, since the Romans took away their freedom and taxed them heavily, among other things. Many Jews expected the king God was sending down to be the new ruler who would overthrow the Roman Empire. Of course, we all know Jesus didn’t do that and instead had a much bigger plan. But this is what upset Judas and many others who shouted “Crucify Him” just a week after praising Jesus in Jerusalem.

Essentially, Judas betrayed Jesus because Jesus let him down. Jesus didn’t have the same plan as Judas, and instead of waiting to see what Jesus would do instead, Judas decided to get as much as he could out of Jesus and be done with Him.

How many times have we treated Jesus as some vending machine? We ask, beg and plead, and once He doesn’t give us what we demand, we stop worshiping Him. I’ve heard so many stories of how people stopped believing in Jesus once something tragic happened in their lives. Maybe a loved one died, a job was lost, or a new leader came into power who goes against their beliefs. How could God let this happen?

I don’t want to minimize your feelings of pain, grief, and disappointment. Crying, needing space, having doubts…that’s all normal and natural and does not deny your faith. The issues come when you abandon your relationship with God after your plans are altered. I want you to step back for a moment and think about all you might be missing out on by being stuck in your disappointment towards God “not coming through for you” instead of focusing on the bigger plan God has in store. God is the only One who knows everything and when you place your life in His hands, you will never be disappointed because you know that even if things don’t go according to your plan, God’s plan is greater and better than what we can imagine.

Now, maybe you’re feeling convicted of a past sin or with the realization that you have abandoned Jesus. Maybe you think it’s too late.

Well, I have some important news for you.

It’s never too late.

Jesus is waiting with open arms. Even when Judas came to the garden with the soldiers to arrest Jesus, He still called Judas “friend”. He still loved Judas even when He knew the evil Judas was doing. But when Judas felt guilty, he didn’t turn to Jesus. Instead, he allowed his guilt and shame to take over and he refused Jesus’ gift of salvation and forgiveness.

But your story doesn’t have to end that way. No, your story is going to be something bigger, better, and more beautiful. Your story already is beautiful because God is writing your story.

Today, think about whether or not you have abandoned Jesus. Remember how much He loves you. Remember how He’s provided for you all along. And most of all, thank Him for His extraordinary gift of unconditional love.

While he was still speaking, Judas, one of the Twelve, arrived. With him was a large crowd armed with swords and clubs, sent from the chief priests and the elders of the people. 48 Now the betrayer had arranged a signal with them: “The one I kiss is the man; arrest him.” 49 Going at once to Jesus, Judas said, “Greetings, Rabbi!” and kissed him.50 Jesus replied, “Do what you came for, friend.”

Matthew 26:47-50

When Judas, who had betrayed him, saw that Jesus was condemned, he was seized with remorse and returned the thirty pieces of silver to the chief priests and the elders. 4 “I have sinned,” he said, “for I have betrayed innocent blood.”

Matthew 27:3-4

The saying is trustworthy and deserving of full acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am the foremost.

1 Timothy 1:15

But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

Romans 5:8