Love Letters to God

If I were to describe love letters in three words, they would probably be vulnerable, humiliating, and bold. Now, I know it might seem like a cop-out to write a letter rather than share romantic feelings in person, but I think it’s just as brave, and possibly more meaningful. It takes more patience, because you have to actually wait for a response. Plus, it takes a ton more effort.

As person who has written (and sent) a love letter before, I can testify that it changes your life. Maybe not in the way you want or the way you expect. For me, I didn’t suddenly have the “relationship of my dreams”. Instead, I was given a new sense of confidence and appreciation. The life I wanted wasn’t what was best for me, and now I’m glad I didn’t get what I wanted at the time.

But I’m not here today to talk about romantic love. I’m here to talk about a love that is just as important–actually, more important–and can feel just as painful sometimes. Our loving relationship with God, which sometimes doesn’t feel “loving”.

Have you ever poured your heart out to God and ended up feeling exposed, even humiliated? That usually happens when A) we mistake God as a critical, angry God or B) we don’t get the results we want.

I’m not sure what you’ve been told, but God is not ashamed of you. He loves you and He welcomes you with open arms, even after you’ve made mistakes. It takes a long time to realize this, especially after making devastating mistakes. However, it’s nevertheless true.

As for not getting what we want, I’m sure we’ve all been there. I’ve shared about my long-distanced friendship with one of my best friends and how we haven’t been able to be in communication for months due to technology issues we have no control over. The day before the last time we talked, I poured my heart out to God, tears streaming down my face, bitter words on my tongue. Then, I heard from her. I thought God heard me (which He did), and that was always going to be His answer.

Well, turns out He has something else in store for us, though I’m not sure what yet. At the moment, He’s teaching me to place my beloved friend in His hands and to trust Him. But I won’t lie, at first, when I poured my heart out to Him again and again with different results, I was frustrated. I wondered if I was doing something wrong, or worse, that God didn’t care anymore.

But here’s the thing: God isn’t a magic genie who grants our wishes. When we pour our heart out to God, we won’t always get the answer that we want. But we will get the answer that’s best for us.

I don’t say that lightly. What’s meant to be will happen. When we place our difficulties into His hands, we aren’t guaranteed answers, but we are guaranteed peace. The moment I let go of the situation, I felt an inner peace. Sure, I’m still worried sometimes or frustrated, and I go to God when I feel that way. But I also know that He will always love me and do what’s best for all of us.

I never want you to stop running to God. He wants us to come to Him because He’s the only one who can truly heal our wounds and give us peace. But when you go to Him, go because you want to be in His presence rather than hoping your wishes will get granted. No one can manipulate God, which is really good, because if everyone was in control, our world would be way more chaotic than it already is.

Perhaps today you can write a love letter to God, confessing what’s on your heart and seeking healing. Love letters are often a way to find closure. Maybe when you write about what’s bothering you, you will be able to understand it better.

I’m sorry for whatever you are going through. You are allowed to feel the pain. You are valid. You belong here. And you will get through this. I promise.

Can anything ever separate us from Christ’s love? Does it mean He no longer loves us if we have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted, or hungry, or destitute, or in danger, or threatened with death? … No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us. And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow — not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below — indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Romans 8:35, 37-39