The Beauty of Silence

We often underestimate how powerful our words can be.

I know a lot of people use that line to lead up to a “taming of the tongue” speech, but it’s so true. I’ve been reading through Proverbs (which by the way, if you want an overload of wisdom, go check it out) and there is so much advice about using our words wisely.

Our culture emphasizes saying as much as we can whenever we can. But that leads us to be too busy thinking about what we want to say that we don’t listen to anyone else. Being “quiet” is often undervalued. The quiet people are left on their own to observe life and may even be teased, when in reality, King Solomon in the Bible suggests that the people who use their words sparingly and wisely are the ones we should learn from.

The one who has knowledge uses words with restraint, and whoever has understanding is even-tempered. Even fools are thought wise if they keep silent, and discerning if they hold their tongues.

Proverbs 17:27-28

In a society where anyone can say anything, often via social media, we are encouraged to talk over each other and not really listen to what anyone else is saying. That’s why I’m so glad there’s been a recent push to listen to those who have been previously silenced. An old saying goes, it’s better to be a good listener than a good talker.

I’m sure, whether you enjoy talking or listening more, you have noticed how the outgoing, chatty people attract more friends. Hopefully you have a mix of multiple personalities within your friend group. Would you want to tell your deepest secret or confide your toughest feelings in the popular, talkative friend or in the friend who is a good listener?

Now, I’m not saying that popular, outgoing people can’t be good listeners. Sometimes the quiet people aren’t good listeners either, and are more in their own world. But what I mean is that we can all benefit from taking Solomon’s words to heart and treat each word like a valuable gift. If we use our words sparingly and with wisdom, then we will be less likely to gossip (which destroys friendships), say something in the heat of anger, or say something that offends someone.

If I still haven’t proved to you that being a good listener makes you a better person to be in relationship with, think about it this way. We all have that friend, you know the one, who talks for 90% of the conversation and asks you maybe one or two questions about your life. And while you’re answering, they cut in with their own example. You feel like you have to talk as fast as you can just to get a word in edgewise.

Sometimes I wonder if God feels like we do in that situation when we pray. We spend a chunk of our day simply talking to Him, which He loves, of course. But when do we give Him the chance to guide us? I guarantee what He has to say is more important than what we have to say.

But the best benefit of appreciating silence and learning how to listen is that it will help us be able to discern the voice of God. Our conversations with God are the most important we will ever have. And I use the word “conversation” because that’s what it needs to be– two-way!

I’ve shared here about my experiences with hearing from God, and I’ve noticed that when I am set on my own plans and busier, I have trouble knowing what God is telling me.

That’s why my challenge for you–and me!– this week is to take some intentional quiet time with God. No distractions, just you and God. And I bet that will open the door of communication between the two of you.

My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry,

James 1:19

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