Their Victory Can Be Your Victory

“Her purpose is not your purpose.”

@Shelivespurposefully

“Just because you’re happy about her success doesn’t mean you won’t get yours. So celebrate with her! Don’t create a competition that doesn’t exist.”

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I’ve seen quotes of this nature so many times on Instagram these days, and I’m just hoping that I can really live it out. Jealousy, that green-eyed monster, has gotten the better of me countless times. But the truth is, the one it’s really hurt is me. It’s caused me to miss out on what’s right in front of me, and even worse, it’s caused me to harbor resentment towards others, either people I hardly know or even close friends.

We never really know what’s going on in other people’s lives. We don’t know what their story is, or what it took, all the failures along the way, to get where they are today. A lot of us are more private than we let on, not wanting people to know our past. And sometimes, that’s okay. But we also have to realize that others are like that too, and they only want us to see the good side of them. The victory at the end of the long, hard, brutal battle.

When we compare ourselves to others, we aren’t measuring things equally. It’s not a fair competition. We are comparing everything about one person (ourselves) and only a partial chapter of another’s story, likely the climax or the resolution. We are never on the exact same part of life as someone else when it comes to personal growth. So why are we expecting our lives to suddenly be figured out when our friend or an influencer’s life takes a dramatic change?

You have a purpose. An extraordinary purpose that no one else on Earth can fulfill.

But beloved, your purpose is not the same purpose as the person next to you. It’s not the same as your roommate, your sibling, your best friend, or even your partner.

It’s all uniquely yours.

But their victory can be your victory. You can celebrate when your friend gets that promotion, your cousin buys that new house, or your neighbor finally has the means to purchase that item you’ve both been eyeing. It’s not a race. It’s not a competition. What is meant for you will be given to you.

The same goes for that particularly touchy subject…relationships.

This one is hard for me to write and follow.

Even that person that you like, or even love, but aren’t in a relationship with, can be someone you celebrate. Even if they end up with someone else. Because they if they aren’t with you, then they weren’t meant for you. You have someone even better suited for you in your future.

Even if your best friend just got into a healthy relationship and you have been single your whole life. You can be happy for her without getting into a relationship yourself or being in that same stage of life. You just haven’t met the perfect person yet. God’s sparing you the heartbreak.

Even if you feel like everyone else in the world has their person (which they don’t… and if you think about it, you’ll realize you probably are in good company being single) you can still celebrate. You are loved by the most powerful, loving, and faithful being in the universe– God. You don’t have to be loved by some person in order to be cherished, worthy, valuable, and enough. You don’t have to be defined by a relationship. You are God’s precious creation no matter what.

So today, encourage others who you may have been envious of earlier. And I know it’s hard. I struggle with jealousy all the time, so this post is for my own benefit as much as yours. But also realize that there is so much more ahead of you that you can celebrate, and hopefully those same people you’re celebrating right now will be able to join you when it’s your turn in the limelight.

You have such a wonderful future ahead of you, and those storms, doubts, and tough situations are only here to make you stronger. You can do this. I believe in you, and more importantly, God believes in you too.

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;

    your works are wonderful,

    I know that full well.

Psalm 139:14